'Did I Move Too Fast for Him?'

Have you ever gotten physical on a first date and then worried that your guy would lose interest?
That's the dilemma on Carlene's mind on this week's episode of LOVElife. Turns out the
real danger to a budding relationship isn't making out too soon, it's OVERANALYZING
his every move. The secret to making it work is "zooming out," as I explain in my answer..

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Video links at the end -

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[andromedakrisela]

Don't ask for affection, if you feel that he is ignoring you, don't try harder.

[britannyify]

Matt-- you need to do follow up calls with these guests. I'm always curious how it ends up going for them and IF they actually take your advice.

[Zoe.TheBody]

I wonder if men really over analyse like women do....seriously....its exhausting!! lol

[FreeSpirit]

Be who you are, keep healthy boundaries, the right guy will like you just as you are.

[ideasidea]

Couldn't it also be that, after they kissed and slept together, he is more laid back because he knows that she likes him and he doesn't feel he has to fight as much as before?

[msk]

Mattew I really needed to hear this because I too feel just like that girl. I'm always over thinking, thinking too much into things instead of just having fun and enjoying myself.

[annefleurvangroningen]

‘I’m gonna see the average of this guys actions’. That just really helped me bc on average this guy is interested and when I zoom in to specific moments I feel like he’s not. So that’s a great tip!!

[ohheyynina]

The overanalyzing was exhausting to hear, but Matt had great advice.

[litawi]

As a fellow over analyzer, i REALLY needed to watch this! Thank you caller, thank you Matt!

[daz]

As a man, the definition of 'easy' at 3:00 is Brilliant. I have slept with girls on the first or second date, and have tons of respect for them, i have been in 3 LTR (6mo-3years) where we slept together within the first week. it has NOTHING to with the timing of physical escalation but EVERYTHING to do with how you feel you deserve to be treated. which includes boundaries, and saying 'no' and responding to those times when I make a mistake, or say the wrong thing.

[oracleonwheels]

Wow, this convo really spelled out what empowerment looks like. Here is what I heard; I can do what I want, be authentic, and be very honest with myself and the person I'm dating. As long as I continue to focus on the life I'm manifesting, I can do what I desire.

I listened to this. Then called the man I've been playing "hard to get" with. Let me tell you what I now know about this phrase "hard to get".
We attract confusion into our lives when we use the hard to get strategy, and we attract people who are "hard" (not moving, no ease, blocked) "to get" (possession, ownership, understanding).

Today, is a day of liberation! No longer will this strategy be used by me. I give myself permission to be who I am and if the man I'm dating doesn't respond in a loving way to the truth of who I am, then I invite in the man who can and does.

Matthew, add another successfully healed single woman to your list. Thank you for the inspiring service you provide. 💖✨🙏🏽✨💖

[realalldway-raw]

Carlyn, its simple Pull Back. Stay as you were before you made out with him. Give him space & concentrate on you. Do the same thing you were doing before. Continue meeting others. Don’t focus on him alone till he claims you as his Girlfriend. Even then continue flourishing your own life & goals.

If he really wants you, he will realize that on his own.

Maintain your composure & positivity in life. See how he’ll chase you.

If he doesn’t at least you didn’t give all of you.

Goodluck

[angiesanchez]

“Kissing someone on the first date can be really hot. Being with someone who overanalyzes your every move is not” damn Matthew, okay! But actually, as a chronic over-analyzer, I needed to hear that 😂👌🏽

[artbyporschia]

That caller was so giggly! Loved her laugh!

[Sunflowergazer]

"Overanalyzing is like watching the just rotting your brain."  I'm laughing out loud, ....that's hilarious and perfectly said, Matthew.  Too funny!!! :D

[Peachylovesyou]

Lol...I overanalyse like theres no tomorrow. I needed this video! XD

[jenniferlovin]

Yeah the kiss wasn't the problem, unless someone is a bad kisser.  Most likely the guy was put off by the games that the girl was playing, "playing hard to get" denying advances but then being aggressive.  Guys don't like indecisive girls that play games.  Try enjoying the date.  Guys loved being appreciated by seeing the lady enjoying him, the date and herself.

[quinn]

I've been in the same situation like this. I've been so overthiking that i cant sleep at night. But then i "zoom out" (like Mathew said), things've changed a lot. Instead of sitting there waiting for his message or analysing his feelings bla bla, i occupied myself by doing sth else like watching youtube, reading online news or maybe just chatting with my friends on facebook, and it was fun, it made me think less bout' him and i found that spending time for youself is never a redundant thing to do, it also makes him think that "Wow she's so energetic without me, she's the one who can enjoy herself and that's lovely, perhaps i should take her time more!"
well, these are just my personal experience and i wanna share to you, hope it helpful :D

[Amy_Stanmore]

This call is hard to listen to, just do what you feel like, no games, be open, have fun, be respectful. Be genuine, stop rejecting men, it's silly, You do what you feel like. Generally guy don't call and text regardless they are waiting on the experience to seeing you that is their goal not talking on a

[debraross]

Matthew,
I'm finding this video years after it was posted. I feel that often we are lead to people or advice that is relevant with no time frame. I just want you to know that your God given gift is so apparent in what you do, how you present yourself, and the knowledge you share. You matter. I have listened and laughed and conected with many of your shares but this one hit home with words that have no age restrictions or time restraints. " what you do with your time and energy is important. " "How you stick to your principles in life, how you live with integrity, how you give to the world what you want to give to the world is important "
This advice Matthew is not only relevant then, but now and always. Thank you. Thank you for sharing your gifts.