Dementia Caregiving Verbal or Physical Outbursts

[carolynsole]

My husband has Parkinsons and swears at me so much. I do take it personally and it upsets me so much. It is definitely changing how I feel about him, difficult to continue to even like someone who can be this nasty.

[ladyrose]

My mom has dementia not alzheimer. She's very nasty and swear a lot and screaming for the police to come and kick me out.The next day shes' very nice and loving. I'm very sad.

[bianca-pwbx]

I am 16 and currently training to work in aged care. This video was super helpful! <3

[IMadeThis]

My husband is bipolar. He has the same problems. He has verbal outburst, physical outbursts, and becomes angry quite easily. I was already a patient person, who never yelled, and was very diplomatic, and this works very well. Of course, your patience can run out, and that’s when I read from my Bible. Another thing that has worked for me, is putting on a really fun song on my phone. Figure out what kind of music your person likes, and just one little song can turn everything around. When I put a song on, he smiles and dances. It’s wonderful.

[ralex]

My mom has dementia agitation as she continues to lose control, horrible disease.
She is in an early stage of the disease, but it will get worse as she gets older
Bladder infections are a big part of her decline. Sad to watch this unfold.
I’m not a trained expert, but I’ve been learning more about this illness day by day
She has some good days and I can be calm, but when the bad days are there puts me in a whirl.
Trying my best and praying I die before this disease hits me. Horrible thing to go through, but if you live into your nineties chances are this will be your fate. It’s an unstoppable train.

[annetakubiak]

My mother always was THE NICEST PERSON . Now is just the opposite

[LeanneAuroraBlue]

My father has always been a toxic Narc, tonight visiting him in the hospital I was abused for the last time

[christar]

My “mother “ was always a screaming, hateful, super-narcissistic personality disorderd witch. She was so abusive and last I saw her she had the beginning of dementia. I’d hate to see her or be anywhere near her now. She was attacking me more than usual. She doesn’t deserve any help from me.

[tienkan]

Yes, patience wins everything. Be calm

[OwnedByTheState]

Imagine not that your body is falling apart, but your memories, your love, your very sense of self is fragmenting, decaying, fracturing, collapsing. It is fear and horror incarnate that this person is experiencing, if you really want to help you must respond with compassion to a person's entire reality collapsing in upon itself.

[marrianner.]

Regarding how many times you can work and strive to de-escalate situations, we can have outbursts in the same manner. It is so sad ....the deteriorating brain, but it is cruel on the caregiver who has to deal with these violent outbursts!!
My husband is 16 years older and now 89. This disease ruins a long-time marital relationship. The bad times with the disease overpower good times. I feel like a single person and have lost any love that was there.

[LadyRedBird]

It reminds me of my kids whom have autism. The way to redirect, engage, help them through chaotic thoughts and reactions etc....my mother currently has pretty bad delirium in the hospital right now, however she has exhibited dementia symptoms since 2018/2019. She has not been diagnosed with dementia at this time but videos like this just confirm what I've already known, combined with delirium. One day at a time. ✨

[Spiritualabuseandrecovery]

Oh dear Lord this is my mom and dad controls everything we do or say, now he has dementia too it's a mad house now

[nunyabiddies]

Watching to clip around 1:44 is chilling. My mother does exactly and I mean EXACTLY what this lady is doing. Bshe completely overreacts and gets angry if she can't find a certain pan, silverware.. she goes on to accuse one of her family members of stealing it. We have been getting accused of stealing things that she seems to have lost on a daily basis now sometimes 2-3 times a day. Dealing with her mood swings has become completely unbearable. But what confuses me is that she is a highly functioning individual for right now at 65 years old she's a respiratory therapist about to retire. So she seems to handle her job okay (although I'm not at work with her so I don't really know) she also comes up with bizarre accusations, like somebody stole her windshield wipers and replaced them, we get accused of things like this that I'm at my wits end.. if anyone else has any similar stories to share with someone they know has been diagnosed with dementia I would love to hear your story for comparisons

[rhondawiggins]

That’s when they go to the nursing home. people shorten their own lives, taking care of partners or parents like that. Nursing homes with dementia units are equipped to take care of those people then you can go visit them.

[ecopley]

There were some good tips in this video, but one thing I didn't agree with. I understand in the beginning people may think it helpful to say "I'm sorry" as was mentioned here. It was also mentioned "apologize" - but did the carer do anything wrong? Initially this apology tool seems a very useful tool to a caregiver as it pacifies the person with dementia. They are convinced you have done something wrong, and the apology soothes them. It may even seem to the carer's sense of honesty, that it is not dishonest, as you are only apologizing for a potential slight, not a real one. This pattern will repeat.
Unfortunately, the long term consequences of continually apologizing to a person with dementia are not good. They will get the idea that you really have a problem, that you are always doing something wrong, that they need to instruct you and help you as you just can't get it right. They will soon believe that you are the crazy one, and they need to help you.
I say, start out from the beginning by not using the "apology" tool as it may mislead the demented person. They don't understand honesty either as many things are beyond their comprehension. I suggest using diversion technique instead - something else to look at or talk about, something non-controversial and just pleasant to behold, like a garden, etc. Hopefully they will soon forget the imagined slight, until the next one comes along for sure, but then you have to do it all over again. One of the main things is to stay calm, not because it helps, it doesn't always, but just because in the end you will be glad you did, it's the right thing to do. Watching what you say and how you say it will only help with some dementias and not others.

[IamMagsB]

Ok but how do you explain when a person with dementia tells you to kneel before her? That was an embedded bad character that subconsciously let out.

[enchantress]

My dad has brain cancer related dementia and he's accusing of a lot of ugly things. So I'm just having any interaction anymore. He has nothing nice to say

[AeroBennett]

My father has a short temper than mine
He has yelled at me
he has yelled at my mom
And I am at my wits end over my father’s behavior
Fueled by stress and frustration

[brandyhuffman]

Dementia patients pick up on your body language, always remain calm and maintain eye contact.