How To Stop A 'Frustrating' Dementia Behavior

Sometimes people with Alzheimer's disease, Lewy Body dementia, Frontotemporal dementia, and vascular dementia can do things that are frustrating to the caregiver. Things that end up costing the caregiver more time. In those cases,, you'll want to try the approach of "getting ahead of the behavior." This video breaks down the approach. Be sure to leave your ideas in the comments below so careblazers can help and share with one another.

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☀️ THE DEMENTIA DAILY DOSE:
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In case you haven’t met me, my name is Natali Edmonds and I am a board certified geropsychologist. That means that I am a clinical psychologist who specializes in working with older adults. One day, while hiking a trail, I came up with the idea for Careblazers and I decided to see if posting videos online could provide help to the many other Careblazers in the world who don’t get to have help come directly to them in their homes. I hope that this work helps you in some way on your caregiving journey. #careblazer #dementia #alzheimer

[activistgranny.]

I planted flowers for my mother because she was cutting our pumpkins before they were ready. I grew a lot of different cut flowers and potted herbs for her. She stopped cutting the pumpkins and started cutting and arranging her flowers. It also got her to spend more time outside and walk around the backyard.

[janejohnson]

My husband often criticizes my driving and this gets very annoying, particularly when we are on a day trip. I found some audio books he finds enjoyable and listening to these on our trip has significantly decreased his repeated criticisms.

[rachelt]

I do this for my family member with dementia. She loves to rummage through her things. I brought her an 18 gallon tote and a couple smaller 12-16 quart storage bins and filled them with random items. She likes to go through the containers and moves items between the bins. It works to keep her focused on something positive.

[stevenblack]

We use different colour socks 🧦 and have 20 pairs and we pulled them apart and get her to pair them up and then we fold napkins as well

[cherierobinclark]

I have recently become my moms caregiver and your videos are helping me. It’s easy to get frustrated when you don’t understand what is happening, it’s so gradual sometimes.

[WriteWordsAllDay]

Thank you for this video, and all of the other information you so freely give. My 70-year-old dad is about 3.5 years since diagnosis and we’ve progressed to about a stage V out of VII. Mom and I are the main caregivers (other family members try but aren’t fully on board). We find ourselves (as I know so many others do) in this weird place of loving Dad where he is but also preparing for whatever comes next. It’s so stressful. And terrifying. Mom and I work as a team and do research and share the responsibilities….and I cannot fathom how so many do it on their own. It’s just a lot. And….I hate dementia. I hate losing my dad piece by piece. Sigh. But we won’t let him go without all the love and support we can give him, as long as we can.

[marybrand]

My husband was a coin collector so we exchange $100. Of quarters each week at the bank for him to go through looking for something he needs. It is helpful with memory, eye hand coordination and he likes it. It keeps him from ordering stuff on his phone.

[arthurlincoln]

How about having a box of colored balls or plastic blocks or some other items that have two or three colors and asking your loved one to sort them into separate jars or another box? For men, how about a box of screws or bolts that need sorting?
As ever Dr Natalie gives good simple advice that we can all follow.

[dannymeske]

The problem is keeping them interested in the new activity...they lack focus! And go back to seeing things that aren't there or happening! It's a lot like the terrible 2's

[KiKiQuiQuiKiKi]

Here’s an activity idea: (after sorting through family photos and taking out the “keepers”) give them a box if photos to “sort, ” “identify, ” tell stories (real or imagined), etc.

[susanlarberg]

I give my husband all the small towels, wash clothes and socks to fold. He feels he is helping and I tell him how proud of him I am and it makes him happy

[robinbliss]

I love this idea! My mother used to be very organized and has a reputation as having an orderly mind. Well this is no longer the case, but I can go through boxes of stuff in my closet that needs to be organized or sorted and have her go through those boxes, one at a time, rather than her reorganizing the kitchen every week (she no longer cooks, and frequently forgets where she has moved something to, thus making things harder for me and my sister, who do all the cooking now). Even if it’s just a box of clothes to be donated, she can sort them by size or season and feel productive and accomplished without making my life harder.

[xiixiixo]

My mother retired from the post office. I give her "mail" to read and sort.

[spiritwave]

Thank you so much for everything you do. You have majorly helped my experience with my mom go as smooth as possible. She is at the point, where words only sometimes work. She does not do anything improper at this time, thankfully, but she once expressed a desire to go through the change jar to wrap the coins. I calmly said no, at the time, because I knew she would miscount (and no, I did not tell her that), and she was fine with that. Now I can suggest that she do that, and then I will reset it all, so she can do it again, when she wants to. Hopefully, I won't need the change for something else lol. My point is to always listen to your loved one, because they give you clues to make life easier.

[debby]

I was going crazy with this all winter when I couldn’t take mom out as often due to weather. I bought a few unfinished bird houses, some paint and had her paint them so she could put out this spring. It kept her busy, focused on using her hands but didn’t require any thinking. She painted them all the color of her house, no variation at all 😂 and now wants to keep them all inside for decorations instead of in the flower gardens. I’ve learned to pick and choose my battles wisely for mental preservation so inside decorations they are 😂

[susanerevia]

Ok, I thought that I would never have an but my mom loves candies, and we have leftover of mixture of Halloween candy. I'm going to have her sort them out into old cottage cheese cartons. She usually restricts her self to 2 or 3 candies so I think she will be safe with the whole bag. Will see how it goes. Thank you to everyone who is sharing ideas.

[theaweavers]

One afternoon my loved one really wanted a gin and tonic which we didnt have so we went into the kkitchen and together made a pot of tea then found our favourite cups and then looked for biscuits we went back and drank the tea in the garden ...no talk of gin!!

[donaldnicol]

My wife was given an MRI two weeks ago for getting dizzy upon standing up, and getting very bad headaches.This past week our family doctor called her in and said her frontal and temporal lobes were more reduced than he thought a 65 year old would be.Sometimes she will mix up the order of a couple of words in a sentence.Or perhaps over treat the dog and cats.She has always had a big interest the well being of all kinds of wild animals.Our front yard looks like a feeding/drinking station for birds, squirrels, rabbits and a chipmunk.But this is something that makes her happy, and gives her a positive outlet for a deep caring for animals.

[andrewbennett]

My mum is being abusive to me it's killing me I love her so much it's destroying me I love her so much

[shanesmaineshop]

I just want to say thank you so much for your videos. My mom has now passed on but by watching your video we were SOOOO much better equipped to work with her. Thank You Thank You.