ULTRA ORTHODOX: Hasidic Jewish Sect FORCED Her to Marry & Consummate with a Stranger

**Content warning: Sexual Abuse/Sexual Discussions** A brave and fierce mother, Chavie Weisberger, divulges the deepest, darkest corners of her life from growing up in a very strict ultra-orthodox sect of Judaism ran by her grandfather. She shares her heart-wrenching custody battle and how the courts forced her to conform to the religion years after she had left it behind. Listen with caution, this episode is as heavy as it is inspirational and incredible.

Chapter Markers
00:00:00 Intro
00:02:31 What is Hasidic Judaism?
00:05:06 The restrictions she grew up with
00:06:42 The extreme modesty guidelines (no red)
00:11:12 Her "formal" sex education at 18 yrs old
00:17:14 Did she feel ready or excited about sex with her husband?
00:19:11 Not understanding her sexual connection with women as an issue
00:22:46 Forced consummation
00:28:36 Religious practices before/during sex
00:31:59 What happened once she went to therapy...
00:38:53 25 yrs old, divorced with 3 children under 5....HOW?
00:43:38 The reason her kids were swiftly taken away
00:47:37 Court ordered her to HIDE her values from her kids. Forced conformity.
00:52:12 Forced to keep kids in Hasidic community
00:54:51 How the kids are doing now
00:58:55 Linda, Listen

Resource for people who need help leaving Hasidic Judaism

For a Male perspective, check out this video with Yohanan

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Theme Song Produced and Composed by Christian Guevara

**Disclaimer: Thanks for joining us at Cults to Consciousness. This storytelling podcast is meant to be for entertainment purposes only and does not substitute for medical advice. We may discuss triggering topics and we ask that you make your personal mental health a priority. Lastly, the opinions of our guests do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the host.**

[sarahs.]

Can we take a moment to applaud all the powerful women who stand up against oppression that men brought upon us.

[daylightbright]

Can we all take a moment to applaud the Rabbi from Israel who actually told her it would be healthiest for her to leave the marriage since she was clearly unhappy and not in love? AND gave her practical advice on how to do that safely?? Absolute chad.

[ErikaFischer-id]

She smiles so much and brings so much positivity allthough she ‘s been in hard moments and traumas. Great soul!

[baylamakarov]

As a modern Orthodox Jew, it’s so crazy how the same creed can be taken to such extremes. I’m so thankful I grew up in such a moderate, open, and spiritual Jewish environment where I actually got to enjoy my religion and allow it to enhance my life instead of ruin and restrict it

[yefefiyah]

As someone who bore witness to Chavie's struggle, and as someone who left the hasidic community myself and is raising my 16 year old outside of the confines of fundamentalism, I am in constant awe of Chavie and the strength that was required to come through this so successfully, with so much grace. Chavie is one of the most beautiful, mindful, skillful people I have ever been fortunate to meet. And seeing her kids come into their own has been a gift as well. Thank you, Chavie, for sharing your story so selflessly. And for giving your children the gift of freedom.

[susanpaul]

Chava, you do not need a ghost writer. Write your book yourself. Your voice is very, very authentic and very srong, full of courage and what you have learned through so much hard work.

[diaryofanotdgirl]

I too am Chavi. Not her. But a woman who went through what she did. I had my 9 year old daughter kidnapped by my own siblings after leaving the hasidic community in 2015… and I’m in London. This is worldwide. Thank you for sharing your story. You are a true inspiration ❤

[Kat-trig]

I was married to a Jehovah's Witness and I can see so many similarities in beliefs (especially with how women are viewed). I remember when I got divorced I was 25, with a 5 year old son with cerebral palsy, living abroad and being completely alone (because not only did I not have family in the country, he isolated me from all of my friends) and just having mixed feelings of relief, anger and fear. I'm now 43 years old and I can still recall that moment I got my freedom back- it felt like I was given a second chance at life, like being brought back from the dead.

[glamourgeek]

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It is the first time I truly understood my parents’ divorce when I was a year old and the horrors my mom went through to remove us from my grandparents’ conservative community. This podcast is going to play a big part in my healing from childhood traumas.

[purrfectnails]

Omg when she talked about her 20 yo going to college, and exploring relationships and themselves as opposed to being forced into a marriage and having babies like she was at that age, I just felt all the work she did that payed off for her and her children.

[sharonmedeiros]

By the way, I stumbled on this podcast accidentally and didnt think I would want to hear about the terrible experiences other women have gone through, but Ive been rivited by every story Ive listened to, and have learned so much and gotten such insight from them. I feel a newfound sense of connection to other women and a much deeper empathy to women I never thought I had any connection with. Its given me a strong sense of sisterhood, so well done! This is a wonderful and important series.

[LovinglfDesigns]

This wedding night sounds horrific and traumatizing for both the man and the woman. This woman is so brave.

[momogal]

I left the Mormon faith when my bishop told me I had to get permission from my abuser to obtain a "temple divorce" after my legal one. I can't imagine how bad it would have been had we had children. My heart aches for women like this who have so much more trouble leaving their old lives and for those who are still trapped.

[ForgottenWalrus]

I grew up in an orthodox household and in an ultra-orthodox community and left when I was 16, I just wanna say this video made me feel so happy and seen. It is so difficult for me to find similar stories to my own, it often feels isolating. Thank you so much for posting this and talking about the topic in a respectful way that does not encourage antisematism (because I find this topic often encourages others to be antisemetic unfortunatly ): ) Keep posting videos like this!

[roadlesstraveled]

I appreciate how Chavi explained the differences between Jewish sects. It would have been very easy to lump us all into "bad, crazy, Jews who oppress all the women" and i really respect that you took the time to explain the differences. Great video!

[Selahsmum]

As much as I am horrified at, and grieve along with Chavi for the abuses of her upbringing and her marriage, and I am even MORE impressed by her dedication to her children to obey the unfair court rulings that she had to, basically, pretend to be hassidic for her children all those years. I highly, highly respect the personal sacrifices that she made in order for her children to have their mother in their lives and to be able to be a bridge to freedom for them once they were grown. That is truly self-sacrificing and admirable. God bless them all.

[Jet_Pilot]

Great interview and also infuriating. A judge has no legal authority to force someone to follow religious rules. That’s an incredible first amendment violation.

[RagingThroughSpace]

As a Jew who grew up studying the Torah and semi-religious but not Hassidic at all, and hearing about the "bad spirits after the wedding" again for the first time as an adult, I wonder if what it really is, is depression following an unwanted marriage and unwanted consummation.

[lisaboban]

"Neither of us wanted to be there."
I cannot imagine what that must have felt like.
Thank you Chavi for sharing this with those of us who have no exposure to this world.

[rowanhard]

It never fails to annoy me when ANY religion is allowed to suspend the constitution. This is why separation of church and state is important. Only people who want to force their beliefs on others are against that separation.
Congrats to anyone who escapes religious suppression.