Villain Therapy: GRU from Despicable Me

How do you learn to have a healthy attachment style?

Licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright react to Gru’s villainous story arc in the first Despicable Me film. They’re talking about Gru’s hurtful behavior from childhood trauma and how he arrives at a positive place. Jonathan explains Gru’s anxious avoidant attachment style, and he praises Steve Carell for convincing the filmmakers to lean into Gru’s evilness. And Alan wonders if this movie is actually about him. Is Alan Gru?

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Cinema Therapy is:
Written by: Megan Seawright, Jonathan Decker, and Alan Seawright
Produced by: Jonathan Decker, Megan Seawright, Alan Seawright, and Corinne Demyanovich
Edited by: Nathan Judd
Director of Photography: Bradley Olsen
English Transcription by: Anna Preis

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[Jonathan_Collins]

This is probably one of the best “villain turns good because of someone in their lives” movies up there with Megamind.

[superfanmusicmaker]

One of the best little details about the movie is how, to us as the viewer, the Minions all look exactly the same (there's only like four distinct designs and they’re all copy-pasted hundreds of times) but Gru can tell them apart, and he even knows all of their names despite there literally being thousands of them. It's not only funny in its absurdity, but it actually says so much about the characters and their dynamic without making a big deal of it.

To Gru, the Minions aren't just his generic, faceless henchmen, they're his actual friends/family. It fleshes out their relationship beyond master and lackey, and before he even adopts the girls, this is the film's first real hint that Gru _isn't_ really the heartless, evil villain he's trying to be.

[trinaq]

Margo using reverse psychology against Gru to get him to take her, Edith and Agnes to their dance class was not only hilarious, but is the first time that he steps up as an adoptive parent.

[FrisbeeGorbeh]

As a parent, I will say everything about the book reading scene was 100% accurate. You're exhausted from a long day, you're reading a book to calm them down, help them with development, and get them to DEAR GOD JUST GO TO BED and it's the weirdest story you've ever read, then suddenly there's a line that reminds you how much you love your kid and brings you into the moment and everything wonderful about them and you're doing your best not to cry in front of them. Ah, parenthood

[sadie]

I love how Margo gets to stop being a sister mom and starts getting to be able to be just sister.

[Frossheary]

That first scene with Gru and the ice cream kid sets up his character so perfectly in a subtle way - this is a man petty enough to carry a balloon around literally for this bit. I don't remember the movie justifying him having a balloon for any other reason, the man literally puts a balloon and needle in his pocket with the intention of ruining a kid's day with it, and it's gold.

[Jonathan_Collins]

The fact that Despicable Me comedy still holds up 12 years later is amazing lmao.

[tylerledgerwood]

In this world it's "You either die a Villain or you live long enough to see yourself become the Hero".

[nalublackwater]

My favorite scene in this movie is when Gru is literally holding the Moon in his hand, but rethinks if it's the most valuable thing when he sees the ticket for his "daughters" function floating by. I just love how they delivered the message of the entire movie without a single line of dialogue.

[AnonJuggerbot]

I'd really like to see a Villain Therapy for Tai Lung. He's kind of the opposite of Gru- A child who was coddled and was over-promised things he couldn't have, and was furious when he didn't get all of the things he was told he'd get.

[applejayz]

Another thing I like about the carnival game scene is that the whole movie so far his attitude's seemed very "Everybodies been so horrible, so I dont see why I should put in any effort or care to be any better" but then when he sees someone ELSE doing the same thing to the gourls from an outsider perspective, he can recognize and empathize with his own experiences (plus, as the replies pointed out, it was his own money he was scammed out of as well anyways), and so he steps in. He feels his own personal validation from getting the upper hand, and when their approval comes in, it hits right at that spot

[scocopat]

something I like about this movie is that they dont make the mother overtly and physically abusive like a lot of movies tend to do. Her mistreatment of Gru is a lot more realistic to me, something more people are going to relate to. And it validates that abuse/neglect/mistreatment doesn't have to be physical to leave a major impact on someone.

[pokemonacer]

Jonathan nailing the Gru impression consistently is something

[MorningDusk]

Whoever made the “she craves chaos” edit with Agnes deserves a raise

[FishareFriendsNotFood]

Also love the depiction of an adoptive father who learns how to nurture and open up to emotional communication, so often it's displayed that only mothers can have nurturing instincts.

[FRPWR]

"We all need love and acceptance, the thing we don't realize, is we're already deserving of it, we just need to find the people who see it." REAL AS FUCK

[BigBastion]

I like how each of the three girls represent a diff aspect of Gru himself:
Margo represents his sarcastic nature and cynicism towards people
Edith represents his insanity and love for mayhem and chaos
Anges represents his soft and sweet inside hidden underneath his touch exterior

[jordanread]

What I love about Gru's arc is that he starts in the shadow of his mother. Whom was a renowned super villain. And yet he managed to pull himself out of that by being the one thing she never was.... a loving parent.

[ViraIshnia]

I'd kind of like to see one done on Margo. Throughout the movie, particularly near the beginning, you see her having to be the adult for her sisters. Then they go to the amusement park and she starts to let herself be a kid, trusting an actual adult to make sure that her sisters are safe

[thispincer]

"We are going to steal...!"

"(Pause for effect)"

*"THE