15 First Date Red Flags

First dates can be stressful, they can also be fun and exciting however often we don't see, we may overlook, or we are unaware of the red flags that signify that this person is not a keeper and we should immediatly move on.
When we have little time invested in a relationship, it's much easier to move on with our own life. Why waste time with someone that's not ready for a relationship? Why waste your time with someone who is already devaluing you?
Also, don't forget, many of us fall into a type of codependent persona like the victim or the savior. Don't fall into this trap in the very beginning instead watch this video and be aware of what to look for and if you see some of these red flags, move on quickly so you have the opportunity to find a relationship that works for all concerned.

[seekingthemiddleway]

"Enough about me. Let's talk about what YOU think of me". Ha ha.

[crissieasmr]

Flag # 16: Even if they are very polite with everyone, if you see a flash of contempt when they are looking at you, even for a fraction of a second, never call them again. These people may treat you well for a while but they will always look down at you. They are the best actors.

[barbaraf.]

I have a HUGE red flag: if you ever, ever get that feeling that that person (your date) is trying to CHANGE YOU in any way - run and never look back. People who try to change you DO NOT LOVE YOU AT ALL; they're just looking for a victim to drive her/him insane.

[christapista]

1. Last minute change of plans or cancelling date
2. They show up really late
3. Asks too many questions about your ex on the first date
4. They’re looking all over the place - not paying attention to you
5. They can’t put down their phone
6. Talks about themselves constantly
7. Tells you about their ex and bad-mouths them
8. Goes to the bathroom too often and comes back acting different
9. Getting sexual too quickly on the first date and talking about it constantly
10. Making slight devaluations of you
11.They’re overly dramatic and sucking your will to live
12. They don’t accept disagreement very well
13. They treat the waitstaff rudely
14. Asks you to help them financially on the first date
15. They lose their cool with you or someone else at the date

[teresaperez]

I had a date and the guy talked for 3 straight hours. I literally couldn't get a word in. I was so exhausted. Needless to say. no 2nd date happened. LOL

[Ethericrose]

I went on a first date in my youth with a number 7. He actually told me how he'd needed to punch his ex to shut her up. I excused myself, saying I needed the loo, yet ran for the exit door and never saw that guy again. There are some strange people out there.

[terrietackett]

I give them 15 minutes of being late, beyond that, I'm unavailable. I've hated this since I was a teen.

[NOWoclock]

These flags are here to save you! I love that! Remember, don't collect red flags, you only need ONE!

[NKRAIEM]

I had a first date where she told me she went thru a nervous breakdown- was playing victim card early on and was a sign of what was to come...ended up being a BPD- she activated the savior in me... and ended up stayin in for 4 yrs, until I got completely drained. And now I GET it!

[vampireslayer]

You've got to trust your gut.
She "cold scanned" me the first time we met in person. Then it seemed too easy.
I was Idealized for a year, then devalued and I saw the discard coming (so I ended it).
After six months and some therapy I learned about Cluster B Disorders (I did not have a clue).
With a little more work I figured out that she was BPD with comorbid covert NPD traits.
It was painful, but darn I'm glad that I ended it when I did.

[thomson]

I noticed that people talk about themselves too much when they're nervous, too. It's not always narcissism.

[marks]

I have spent the past 27 years in toxic relationships, I wish I had access to this advice a long time ago, and yet, it is never too late to learn. Thank you 🙏

[teresaperez]

I did have a guy look at me and said.. "I don't like short hair. I'll just buy you hair extensions."

Another guy.. looked at me and commented on my outfit. He said "Oh, trying to keep up with the kids I see."

I felt so stupid. I had literally just bought myself this outfit because I liked it and thought it looked nice.

These were guys I dated. I also notice that one of the guys got SUPER super anger at another driver. It actually kinda scared me. I thought his reaction was over the top. He got anger because the car slowed down.

I'm really enjoying all your videos so much!! Thank you so much for your time and information!!

[zoeiiseda]

You forgot to say--"If they change plans at last minute, they could be married"

[pejmansehatpour]

Ashley I think you are one the most sincere people I listen to on YouTube. Thanks.

[heatherwhittaker]

These things can be true for friendships as well.thank you Ashley...great video.

[prschuster]

Being distracted by the phone is my cue to leave right then and there.

[eeomwyu]

I noticed 99% of people around me have bad red flags....no wonder most of my life I stay single.... There's a lot of garbage out there, and so little and so rare of treasure.

[gigibtsurvivor]

Narcissistic RED FLAGS are also when they ask many questions if you to know your vulnerabilities and intentionally mirror you.

[jorgeespinosa]

Dating is like a box of chocolates....you never know what you're going to get.