I feel nothing - Anhedonia

I feel nothing... like all the time.
Anhedonia is the inability to experience pleasure.

Schizophrenic, Rachel Star Withers talks about how she feels nothing all the time. Anhedonia is a common negative symptom of schizophrenia.

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Lil' Broken Star

To See in the Dark: Hallucination and Delusion Journal

[jayhille]

10 years of anhedonia. I named the monster inside LIFELESS and it's not fun living at all.

[Rainy_Fernandez]

I love how honest you are. I've been chronically depressed for 14 years. I completely get what you're saying. I feel the same way to some extent. I don't really feel like I'm living life. Over the years I've learned how to pretend a little better and at least now I can hold a stable job (although there are many days I wish I could just stay in bed instead). I would say that I experience "blunted affect". I can still feel things but if I display a positive emotion it doesn't feel genuine. I persistently feel an inner emptiness that I have a hard time describing. Putting on a facade is exhausting. I don't try to appear happy or positive...I just put on a face that is enough to get by I guess. I also observe other people and how they interact with others and express their emotions. I know it just isn't the same for me as it once was long ago. I feel so disconnected.

[trevorschneider]

Numbness is the highest level of pain. It causes this constant feeling of terror and extreme uncomfortableness. To keep eating and keep breathing takes all I have because there's just nothing.

[Nieporte]

"I feel like a freak. I watch people a lot."
You're not a freak. I've always watched everyone, so I know how "normal" people act and to make sure they're no danger to me.

Thank you.

[Ghaida]

I feel i'm not excited for anything and I don't know how to find my path in life and I really feel nothing I mean I'm just waiting for my life to end it's nothing i mean this is the only thing that I know that i want it

[Marc-mjsk]

Do people with anhedonia get bored? I mean if you don’t enjoy and feel any pleasure from doing things that would normally be fun, then doing absolutely nothing is the same? I find it difficult not being bored even when doing nothing 🤷‍♂️

[Evian]

Antipsychotics are definitely not gunna help with anhedonia because of the way they affect dopamine. Also I know from first hand experience with antipsychotics that they make me feel really flat.

[solidariosiempreamoalosani]

You are a living example that obstacles can be overcome if you fight with a lot of faith,
I admire you because despite your fears you face to the destination

[joyellen]

I don't feel freaky. I feel that no one realizes that I'm actually not feeling anything.

[luciferfaust]

I've been experiencing this a lot lately. I have major depression and some other disorders. About the only time I feel strongly about something is when I'm frustrated that I'm not getting better. I keep bringing it up to my doctor but he hasn't changed my meds in a long time. I also have a lot of ideas and feel creative and yet, there's no drive to actually do any of it. Thank you for sharing this.

[anonymousanonymous]

I feel the same way. I'm 25 and single . No kids. I can't have a family or even a partner because I'm not feeling anything and it sucks. I can't fake my way through life .

[myloflex]

the last line there really is the most important.

[yoda]

My anhedonia has come from a lot of long-term stress.
I had nothing left, no feeling, no emotions, no motivations, no fear.
I was a complete zombie, dead on the inside.
I have had anhedonia for 2 years, what helped me is l-tyrosine.
Now it's all coming back, just before I had anhedonia, so there is a cure.

[lille-mary]

The pretending. It takes so much energy to do it, you tend to crash into even less energy and less of feeling nothing after you have pretended to not bring your family down for Christmas, or to not make a family member dealing with something tough, feel even worse becaue of your level of not being able to not be depressed. So you pretend, interact, and crash.

[keepcalmanddaytrade]

Same situation! Know one will ever be able to know how we feel. Horrible. To me it was caused by SSRI drugs.

[Ninjabot]

From one "Anhedonian" to another, I'd give you a hug. Even though it doesn't do anything emotionally, it reminds us of some of our humanity on our clearer days.

[dirtybird]

I have depression and I'm dead inside too. Thanks for the vid.

[manuelgentile]

Eat magic mushrooms, forget about anything else !

[marrun]

Rachel- Thank you for sharing- and Keep Going... you are an Inspiration!

[robdavies]

Could be an amazing sunset and id think its a f88king sun setting !!, i fake my happiness to be like others when i see things or am involved. That childhood sense of wonder of the world is long gone,