10 Obsessive Things People With Borderline Personality Disorder Do

In this video, I talk about 10 obsessive tendencies that are common in individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder, keeping in mind that not everyone with BPD will experience these things in the same ways.

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About Me
Hi! I'm Lise Leblanc. I am a therapist, life coach, and author of 9 self-healing guides. I have over 20 years of experience in therapeutic, educational, and leadership roles.

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DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION IN THIS VIDEO IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL ADVICE, DIAGNOSIS OR TREATMENT. All content is for general information purposes only and does not replace a mental health care of consultation with a health professional.

If you have thoughts about harming yourself, get help right away by taking one of these actions:

Call 911 or your local emergency number immediately.
Call a suicide hotline number. In the U.S., call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) In Canada: 1.833.456.4566
Call your mental health provider, doctor or other health care provider.
Reach out to a loved one, trusted friend.
DISCLAIMER: THIS IS FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR MENTAL HEALTH CARE.

introduction (0:00)
1: Obsessive with Love (1:13)
2: Overthinking (3:51)
3: Overreact (4:57)
4: Obsessively Apologizing (6:23)
5: Obsessed with FP (7:03)
6: Asking What's Wrong (9:04)
7: Obsessed over Social Engagements (9:43)
8: Obsessed over Things (10:42)
9: Perfection (11:07)
10: Self-Obsessed (11:33)

#bpd #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #borderline

[patriaciasmith]

Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

[theharringtons]

As a self aware BPDisordered person - I haven't been in a relationship for 16 years as its much less heartache for all involved if I stay single.

[DanyTheMe]

If you have bpd don't let some of the people in these comment sections mess with your head.
Bpd is not a death sentence.
You CAN grow and learn to manage your reactions.
You CAN learn ways to self soothe and regulate.

BPD doesn't really go away, but you can learn to live with it and still have healthy and meaningful relationships. And not let it destroy your life or other's.

You'd be amazed the difference a few years of putting in the work and learning about yourself can make in your life.

[TheKatieking]

Notes from Video
10 Obsessive Behaviors:

1) Obsessive when it comes to love
* mistaken lust as love
* feeling of addiction, but feel safe putting all efforts into it
* faults begin to be seen and love/hate cycle begins
* it is not a game played, but real feelings of emotions
* fears of abandonment, destabilizing emotions, and more symptoms

2) Obsessive replay of past occurrences trying to remember all details
* feels as if something is wrong and trying to find a solution becomes the goal

3) Judgemental thinking (on accident) due to prior events or interpretations noticed
* has episodes of not being able to believe the truth & then moments of completely trusting the person

4) Apologizing occurs profusely
* guilt is easily felt over various reasons, even of things out of control
* also, it is easy to lose control of emotions when dealing with BPD, so usually apologies occur for that

5) Becomes strangely obsessed with a favorite person
* investigates the person even more, to the point of obsession
* sometimes may try to mold themselves into what their favorite person wants them to be

6) Obsessively asking what's wrong
* seeing someone upset can make us think that we did something wrong without knowing the full story
* consistently asking or "assuming" may begin to irritate loved ones

7) Obsessed over self-insecurities
* may make excuses to not go to: events, parties, & other social gatherings
* hard to find satisfaction with self but finds things to feel anxious about instead

8) Impulsive actions based on constant obsession over something
* wanting to buy something right away versus waiting
* jumping into relationships because it may be wanted sooner than later

9) Obsession over being perfect and what others may think
* black&white thinking
* "all or nothing" feeling

10) Self-obsessive and overly self-conscious type of behavior
* can be mistaken as judgemental or narcissistic
* more of an anxiety causing the obsessive behaviors & it can layer upon itself in various ways

[Sonzoul]

A lot of borderlines are borderlines because of their family (parents, siblings etc). I met my husband 16 years ago who is a very good person and I have changed enormously. When your family does not trust you and mistreat you then you develop all kinds of unhealthy behaviours. On the other hand, when someone shows you the opposite, you start developing trust and you become aware of your shortcomings and improve.

[wonderingwanderer]

I was married to someone exactly like this. I loved being the favorite person… until her brother moved in with us and he became her favorite person. I became the bad guy in every situation. It completely destroyed the marriage, and was super creepy in hindsight. She also told me her therapist said I had BPD (had me so messed up I went to 4 different professionals to get confirmation I don’t). The divorce damn near destroyed me, and within a few months, she got with someone new while I was left picking up the pieces. The good thing is it broke me of a need to want to be the rescuer in a relationship and I’m hyper aware of codependency. But those lessons cost a lot of time and tears.

[magau]

BPD stems from childhood neglect that mirrors as we get older.

[Yriel]

"I'm so annoying. I'm kind of fine with the fact that I'm annoying. I annoy a lot of people. People tell me I annoy them. I try not to annoy people too much. Do you find me annoying?" "Well not as a person but this is getting ann..." "I KNEW IT."

[chasing-mental-clarity]

“Not everyone with BPD will have all of these” I HAVE ALL 10 😭😭😭😭😭

[jesselochner]

I've decided to stay alone from now on. I find its a lot easier to be alone. I don't want to hurt or ruin people lives anymore.

[CristiandlfDeval]

I was severely traumatized years ago as a teenage, got diagnosed with BPD. Spent my whole life fighting BPD. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Not until my wife recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Never thought I would be saying this about mushrooms.

[Mo_Makeup_Please]

I'm a self-aware BPD and Bipolar. It's hard to realize what's mood and what's personality. It took a long time for the doctors to figure out I had both. Cognitive Therapy and being mindful has helped a lot. I've been happily in a healthy relationship for 11 years now. It can be done, you just have to learn yourself— something that is easier said than done. You must be prepared to admit your own faults and take the time to think rationally. I know, hard, but it is possible!

[takumichan]

1:14 love
4:01 overthinking
4:58 splitting bad/good hate
6:30 apologizing
7:02 favorite person

[langstonreece]

Face all the demons— the anger, the sadness. The only time I’ve feel control is when I meditate. I become mindful. I’m able to look past my feelings in the moment and say to myself “my feelings change. Soon my anger will pass and love will come back. Just hold on.”

[DD-jmug]

The brain/ mind can be damaged just like a limb or an ankle etc... mental health support and therapy should be easily available to everyone. Starting at school and throughout life. Unfortunately it's not taken seriously enough. Therefore we are left to it. Many many people have mental health problems and are walking around not realising that's it's not them. They can get help and heal.

[earthdragonw]

As a diagnosee, it is really difficult to deal with the guilt of splitting. Obsessing over some minor actions that partners do, or wanting to get that one thing that you know you don't need (like an overseas vacation, or time spent in productive but no long term hobbies), even when that can ruin long term plans. It's exhausting to obsess, and even more to obsess over obsessing (poring over the guilt over and over again in the odd hours of night, losing sleep, catastrophizing). Your videos really give perspective. So does comments from fellow warriors in this page. Sharing light and love.

[irenem]

Most end up like this for they were most likely left all alone as children and formed insecure attachments to themselves, the people and world around them. They don't know who they are for they may have never been able to be who they are to protect themselves from emotional abuse. They probably had a narcissistic parent.

[bean]

I have been on the receiving end of almost all of these for 43 years. Your videos have helped me "put a name on it". Your presentation of the inner turmoil of someone with BPD was helpful. I so appreciate the compassion you show for those with BPD.

[dlm]

This is so me. I've never been diagnosed, but I am horrible in relationships/marriages. I'm 10+ years single and love it. It's freeing. I attract men who have issues, and then it triggers my unhealthy personality disorder.

[MutantAnomaly]

I went researching for help with c-PTSD, but then started hearing about BPD and so many of the experiences I hear shared I relate to so much. The crushing fear of abandonment, becoming completely absorbed by relationships, the obsessive thoughts, personality always fluctuating but never feeling concrete. I haven't been able to see a professional yet, but I've experienced too much of this since I was a kid to not ask about it.