CPTSD

#cptsd #trauma #hypervigilance

[pattif]

Yes - walking on eggshells! Hypervigilant at all times. I am the caregiver of my 92 year old mother. She was very abusive when I was young. I am still working on healing and will be relieved when she passes.
Thank you for your videos. ❤

[CandaceWebb]

So true! It wasn't until I had cancer that I realized that nobody was looking after me. Even though I was always looking after them, it was not reciprocated. I choose to be my own caretaker and best friend.

[amandaforrester]

This is why so many of us LITERAL caregivers, group home workers, nursing home, medical feild peeps seem to have traumatic backgrounds. Late night 2nd shift conversations are often just exchanges of trauma histories and then laughing about it. At least in my experience!

[AlitaAvenger]

Walking on eggshells...yes, it s*cks.
Thanks for this great short explanation about hyper-vigilance and over-focusing to make sure being safe... though it never made us truly safe, no matter how hard we've tried.

[jimberry]

Not just a pretty person but a very intelligent individual. Thank God for you 😮😢😂❤

[LexinePishue]

I feel like my hypervigilance has stripped me of the ability to even identify my own wants and needs, because I was trained from such a young age to consider my wants, my needs, as being way down on the ladder of things we were going to address. They just never quite made it to the top of the list, they weren't as urgent as the upcoming explosion, or getting dinner to the table on time, or it was never as bad as what was happening for my sibling, or my parents. So now, I'm a full grown adult who has a REALLY HARD TIME identifying what it is that will make me feel accomplished, fulfilled, loved and supported. I just... cant' fathom what those things are.

[jonmason]

I used to be so like this...I still can be but I think I got used one too many times and finally got mad as hell. Now, if all, and I mean every single one, of my needs aren't met, I won't be doing anything to help out another human ever again.

[RogueMamaStitcher]

I'm daily proof of that. Your hair looks awesome, Dr Kim

[DauphinPourpre]

I'm working on this. When my mom passed, i started wking out obsessively bc she always berated me about my weight. Now, I'm trying to learn how to put myself first so I can start working out again. I really do love it but there's a mental roadblock bc I don't know how to do this for myself. 😢

[JeraldGarretson-rbfl]

Dear Dr. Sage, sorry for my crazy giddy flatter feathers. I relapsed last night on 4 Coors and half a blunt. Back today on the trail and tails to amends. I am so sensitive when I feel people I cherish most tough love myself. I think most of the time I'm just totally delusional in thinking the entire population is glaring at me. Thanks for the teaching I received today on indifference, I think it is. I look forward to that this evening. Thanks to all of you for taking time to help me. I know you are all so busy.

[JessWicked]

Tears because it hurts to so clearly see myself in words spoken out loud by another person. The mirror hurts yet validates my feelings.
Thank you.

[Midnight_tarot]

Mom was explosive, dad always believed you should stand behind your spouse, even if they are wrong (his words). I somehow forgot that was my entire childhood til just now?? I feel houdini’d but in a helpful way 😂❤

[AFAskygoddess]

*This thought just came to me. I'd like to suggest we all do this ritual.*
I'm going to buy a carton of eggs and place them on the ground. I will affirm that my happiness comes from within me, not from the approval of others. I will promise myself that I will never walk on eggshells again as I walk across them and see that the world doesn't end when shells break.

[sobo]

Yes, walking on eggshells. My Dad and I had good relationship. I was lucky I had one parent could turn too. My Mom on the other hand was cold and ridged with me, if not all my siblings. I knew from a young age to be come quite aware of the mood my zoom was in. In her defense she went through hell and back with her father. But for what ever reason I was her scape goat, black sheep of the family if you will. And I spent as much time as possible in my safe space, my room. I knew my mother would rather me not be around. And in fact one day when she really was upset with me she told me she had hated me since the day I was born. That I was nothing but trouble for the family. It actually came as a I knew it all along moment. When she said the words, well it was a conformation that I was not crazy. It was validating my feelings. I’m not saying it didn’t hurt. But her words finally matched up with her treatment of me. I walked on eggshells everyday of my childhood.

[Coexistwithmyfist]

Yea, I became always scared when my mom would come in my room. I was feeling like she was coming to yell at me again. I hate being around her.

[HMMC]

Holy s#!t….mind blown 🤯 I wish you would take clients outside of California!!! I need to work with you!! Going to start with your courses ❤

[Nagykan]

I feel like my jobs and relationships got worse when I tried to stop doing this.

[BobbiGail]

...then if you learn more and find the courage to stop fawning over these ppl, if they are in a "respected" position in your life, they may make you pay DEARLY for your newfound boundary. They might remind you over and over how YOU have ruined their very life by being independent of theirs. (Super confusing, bc I THOUGHT this was the goal! I didn't know that growing up was a TRANSACTION.)

[davdelmer]

Jesus… Kim is so wise, AND UNBELIEVABLE HOT ❤

[Slipping_thru_the_Seams]

ive always felt like I'm looking at the world from the outside in and not "looking out" through my eyes. weird.