8 years in England as an American (and why it ended)

A reflection on my eight years of living in England, plus I answer your questions from Instagram.

About Love and London:
I'm Jess, I've lived in London for many years, and this channel is a London travel guide for anyone visiting the city that wants to experience it like you live here. Beyond talking about the usual London attractions, I show you some of the cooler things to do in London, that most travel guides don't mention. Watch my videos and you'll feel like you've got a Londoner friend telling you the best kept secrets in the city.

[RestingonHope]

Advice to people wanting to get married. Please do not compromise on things like having children, how you discipline the children, cultural expectations, where you want to live, family culture etc. Please do not compromise on these things if they mean alot to you. Just walk away. Marriage is not a thing to take lightly

[brucejohnson]

I'm a 72 year old American and I have been watching L&L for a few years now. I don't really think that I will ever be able to visit the UK, so I am vacationing vicariously through your channel. I am very sorry for all the bad that is hopefully in your past now, but very glad for the good. I continue to be impressed how such a young person such as your self can accomplish so much. You are truly exceptional. Wishing you all the best!

[roohana]

I'm from NYC and in London for 3 years now. I can relate to a few things - like being more conscious of my American accent:-). Agree London is super expensive but you get a lot more for it than in NYC (more space etc). I'm also self employed and it's a relief to have stellar healthcare and not pay anything for it (except in the form of very high taxes). I always cried when I paid US taxes because I felt like I got nothing for it in return or nothing that was noticeable. But here I don't mind the high tax because I feel like I'm taken care of in so many ways! I love it here! I feel like I'm in center of the universe over here. Continue to enjoy life in London!

[brianbozo]

Americans are great, warm, welcoming people and its a plus when an American is able or choses to live in Britain. The British people are generally kind and welcoming and have a good sense of humour while Americans bring energy, optimism, clear communication which compliments some of the qualities of the British. So its win -win for both. Another huge advantage to living in the UK Is its proximity to Europe with most of Europe being less than a 2 hour flight away or a 3 hour train journey to places like Paris or Amsterdam. You also generally have 4-6 weeks annual holiday and can travel back to the US 2-3 times / year.

[jeremypearson]

I did the opposite, i moved to the US to get married a long time ago and it didn’t work out. I’m now in my late 50’s (no kids ) and remarried for 25 years. I’m glad to hear you’re in a good position mentally and physically. I still miss things in the UK after all this time.

[davetoday]

At the begining of this video clip, I was afraid you were going to say you were leaving London. Thank god you're not! Just love your views of London life. Please keep up the great work.

[bridget]

I lived in Europe for 6 years. I understand about your life disappearing after some time. When I came back, everyone’s life had moved on. We didn’t connect as much because I had all these new experiences. Some stayed but some left.

[iainsan]

I don't usually watch very personal videos like this, but I was captivated by your strength and honesty. I am pleased that you have enjoyed (most) of your time here and I think that you are a very welcome addition to these islands. I wish you all the very best in the future.

[beccajohnson]

You are so inspiring! I'm 23 and moving to London in September and watching you has not only made me even more excited but also settles so many of my moving jitters. You've inspired me to start a travel blog (and maybe even a vlog when I get back to London). Thank you for being you!

[estellehowell]

I have always been convinced I didn't want children and when I was younger lots of people told me I would change my mind.

Well, I will be 49 this year and I never changed my mind and I have no regrets whatsoever.

No disrespect to those who do have children, but parenthood isn't for all of us.

[draoi]

Best of luck to you, hope the next 8 years are full of happiness for you.

[gogogidget]

I am 31, I have followed you ever since you first started this channel, not consistently recently though since I have made the choice to be on social media less in the last 4 yrs. I popped up on here to check on what you've been doing lately and it's a shock to see where you were at before to you being single now. But it's a good shock. I'm saddened that you went through a divorce, but I'm glad you are still able to live in London and continue your work despite all the hardships, and on your own it makes everything much harder but also more rewarding because you're doing everything for you. You're very lucky to continue to do what you want to do, but I know it's your own determination that keeps pushing you. There were many struggles but you're still doing you. It's crazy to see how much one can grow from a carefree 23 yr old to an experienced 31 yr old. I'm super proud of you, girl.

[pattyhart]

I’m a military wife & after 10 years, my husband and I sat down and discussed seriously for a few days about having children and we decided not to have children due to my husband said that he loves our life the way it is and he doesn’t want to share me with anyone: we have an amazing life and I’ve never done what society says I should be doing: I do my own thing. I wish the best for you

[sct]

We never had kids, 1) couldn't afford it 2) too immature 3) didn't want the responsibility 4) scared .
We are now 62/75 years old and have NO regrets and are weathy because we saved so much money.

[dpbusby]

Always liked your channel, sad your original reason for settling in the UK is no more, but very pleased you can, and do, remain here. The UK deserves more people like you.

[janicebrowningaquino]

Hello from Portsmouth, NH!
Well, I’m delighted to have discovered your channel! I’m glad you shared where you have been on your external and internal journey. More importantly, I’m so glad you are beginning to understand the ‘value’ of your own life, and you are enjoying it. I married young. Fell in love with my in-laws and extended family, not so much my husband, I fell out of love with him! Marriage took up most of my 20’s. The sad thing for me about all of this was I am and have been all my life, a diehard Anglophile (maiden name-)Browning) and I studied Romance languages all through school. Eight years of French, two of Italian and Spanish. I have never been to England, anywhere in Great Britain, or Europe. Approaching 70 now, for a variety of reasons I don’t think I will be able to travel now. The reason I share aspects of my story is that I want you to use that information to have a larger appreciation for where you are at this point in your life other than just from your own perspective or that of your friends. I don’t know you, but from watching your face through the entire piece I’d say your do understand that there are good and bad aspects to everything in life-APPRECIATE what you have been able to do on your own. Too many people marry far too young before they know themselves at all. Now, I follow blogs from people all over the world. In particular at the moment, people living in France. You are the very FIRST person in Britain I have found (do you think of yourself as an American ex-pat, or consider that contrived) that I have found to be willing to share who you are evolving to become. All I can say is YOU GO GIRL! Your family may miss you but they should also be so proud of your ability to recover and rebuild. I am SO looking forward to watching many more entries on your channel, I am a new follower!

[analauracoloccini]

As a mother of 3, I totally get that you don't want to have children. Motherhood completely changes the focus of your life, and not everyone needs to want that for them. I live in a different city than the rest of my family, and even though I am just a few hours away, I really empathise with you in many of the things you said. I'm glad you are much happier now. Love from Argentina

[alicates]

Spanish living in the UK for 9 years here and I can absolutely relate to everything you say about living abroad.
It’s funny how different we are from the day we arrived, eh? Specially in your case, but so glad to hear that your are much happier now than then.
Wishing you many more years of happiness in London!

[stevefaulkner]

Ah the 'C Word', children. Thankfully, I came around to the idea that my wife didn't want children and 25 years on, we are still together. We were pressured by family, but we stuck to our guns and remained childless. I really hope that you thrive in your new life. This is a great video, thank you.

[atlo]

Jess, I’ve been following your videos for several months now, as we plan a family trip to London. They always impress me as especially generous. Both in your efforts to present top opportunities, and in the way you invest your self and presenting them. This particular video outdoes them all. Again, very generous, but also notably brave. You put it out there for others to learn from (or even share their own experiences or attempts at advice). If we live right, we’re learning all the way. You have so much to offer, and surely so many great things ahead of you. Enjoy it all.