Pretty Privilege Isn't Real, You're Just Shallow.

[agalus]

The "pretty privilege" starts for girls already in kindergarden which is quite frankly really scary. The pretty girls get all the leading roles in school plays and are always picked over the less pretty ones to participate in social activities. Even when they lack skills to do it, their beauty compensates for it. As a 5-6 year old, I could never figure out why I was never picked to be Cinderella or even her Godmother even though I was a pretty good actress, could read flawlessly, memorise my role and speak very well. Every time I suggested to my teachers that I really want that role, they downplayed me or laughted at my attempt, then gave me a minor role where I only talked one sentence and was supposed to dress up or paint my face. Then I stopped asking, stopped trying to get picked, became really shy and timid, not wanting to participate in anything at all anymore.

[TrueImmortality]

My best friend since childhood is tall thin and a natural blonde. Throughout our teenage years people would tell her she should be a model. She got all the male attention. When my tire blew out no one stopped to help until she came to pick me up on the side of the road. I'm not even what society deems "unattractive" but having a friend who fit the mold to a T really sidelined me for years. She's a lovely lady and a wonderful person. I wish people would find her attractive for that reason. And I wish people would think about the teenage girl beside a girl like her and realize what they don't say is sometimes as important as what they do.

[bananablxe]

let's not forget that some murderers have people who support them only because they're deemed as "pretty" and "cute" (WHEN THEY LITERALLY COMMITTED A CRIME !)

[mariaantoniaramires]

I think Ted Bundy movie with Zac Efron is actually a pretty good example of how being handsome and carismatic can get you away with a lot of stuff. I watched it with my dad and he didn’t know the history of Ted Bundy and he was like “I didn’t get it, is he actually guilty?” Because they showed him pretending that he was a nice guy, then reveling into a monster.

[leahpark]

as someone who constantly, CONSTANTLY gets compared to my "pretty" younger sister and watching her get offered free food, makeup, or whatever from stores while i get passed over because im not conventionally pretty, pretty privilege is real... and honestly being attractive means getting the upperhand in a lot of service / retail job selection as well.

[koalaeucalyptus]

I once saw a video where a black woman was talking about internalized racism. She really marked me with this sentence:
"You can't control the first thing you think, but you can control the second." [EDIT: it was Khadija Mbowe, I couldn't remember when I posted but @S was kind enough to remind me!]

You can first react with the pretty privilege that automatically happens within you, but then stop and think about your biases and decide whether you really have a reason to trust/distrust that person, or if that is an effect of how attracted you are to that person.

[daikonnn]

I remember watching a tiktok of someone interviewing ppl on the street abt the worst thing that happened to them and this woman talked about how when she was homeless, she was picked off the street and kidnapped and tortured brutally. but all the comments were like "youre so pretty!!" "she's so pretty" "aww she didn't deserve that she's so pretty🥺" HELLO SHE LITERALLY WSS TORTURED AND ALL U GOT TO SAY ARE THINGS ABT HER APPEARANCE?!?!?!?!

[blancabizzotto]

I actually have a pretty interesting story with "pretty privilege".
For contest I'm someone who always fitted the generic beauty standards and until 1 year ago I used to have long blond hair and dress really feminine, than I decided to shave my hair off and dress more unisex (cause that's what I preferred) and since I made this change, the way men treat me changed COMPLETELY.
Compared to just on year ago where I used to have long hair where I was catcalled all the time (at least 2 times a week), followed, harassed NOW men barely approach me and if they do it's almost all the time with more respect.
So yeah basically man before objectified me and acted like creeps because they found me more attractive and now that I'm less "pretty" they treat like a human being. That's crazy

[davidmont]

I was valedictorian, top of the class, literally a national representative in philosophy and writing competitions yet the speech and spotlight was taken from me when I graduated and was given to a white handsome dude whose only accomplishment was being more popular and was apparently the principal's favorite student. You can't tell me pretty privilege ain't real.

[bears]

Kpop industry is the living representation of how people judge others based on their appearence, especially of how idols are usually seen as angels and saints because they're good looking, while we know basically nothing of their true personality. Not only that but they're also objectified as hell and a single sign of a change in their "innocent behavior" brings scandals

[kristipatowary]

I hate how most movies or animated movies try to give the message "don't judge a book by it's cover" at the end but only after the protagonist has magically become prettier or rich.

[JH-egyk]

Instead of “pretty privilege isn’t real, you’re just shallow” isn’t it more “pretty privilege is real BECAUSE you’re shallow”? “Pretty” people (depending on where you’re from and it’s beauty standards) are undeniably treated better than those who don’t fit the same mold. Granted it’s our fault and it could go if we as a society got better, but the privilege is undeniably real.

[poilaaliop]

The anime thing reminds me, a few months ago, a WoC posted a casual Tik Tok illustrating how discovering a certain type of manga was like... A really happy sexual awakening for her. She got ripped to shreds for it. Literally tons of white egirls post about the same content and get congratulated and thirsted over. But ONE PoC (who didn't have an egirl style btw? I feel like that might play into it too) posts about her love for it and gets slated. It was horrible, I hope she's OK.

[malory]

Pretty privilege does exist, BECAUSE people are shallow, even if they don’t think you’re shallow, you are. You perceive people’s actions differently based on their appearance.

[AlllieDayes]

But we need to seriously talk about the psychological damage this does to people and how it shapes their dysmorphia, low self esteem and difficulty and sometimes inability to truly love themselves

[sklerpo]

i love that salem does her makeup to fit the topics she talks about like who else puts that much love into what they create

[scarletthuxley]

the Ted Bundy film u mention is from the perspective of his girlfriend and is meant to be romanticised to reveal his evil - it's about how she sees ted. The directors cast Zac Effron because he is the "heartthrob" of our generation, and seeing him do all these evil things allowed modern audiences to understand why all these women are blinded by charm and beauty. It's a warning, not an endorsement

[kyraschluter]

The entire thing with having zac efron play ted bundy was to highlight this romanticisation of ted bundy at the time and highlight the entire halo effect people had around him. As well as the essential shock factor of seeing this attractive man as a serial killer which plays into the pretty privilege area of his trial and its following. It's a really good film that shows how this all went down very well and efron is amazing in it. It doesn't romanticise ted bundy but showed how other people did and how messed up it was.

[no.]

As a black person who grew up with internalised racism and self hate, and is still trying to overcome it, seeing the title made me upset. There are a number of examples I could give of people getting away or doing some messed up stuff and get away with. I have BEEN the bane of one of those examples. Pretty privilege is VERY much real.

[veronicalynn]

I'll never forget when I was in 5th grade. I always loved the outdoors, in the summer I'd stay out there all day till I had to come inside. I would get very tanned, due to being mixed with Mexican, Puerto Rican, Native American. I had very long dark hair and for some reason, as a kid, I had very thick sideburns and my arms would get hairy. Well anyway, I had a crush on this kid named Brandon, He didn't know, but one day he was like, "Veronica, I want to tell you something." I got so excited that he was even talking to me until he says loudly in front of some other kids how I looked like a monkey and started making fun of me for being tanned with thick hair. I ended up getting suspended cause I punched him in the face. I'll tell you what, he never messed with me again though. He deserved it haha.