Why Did God Let Them Die?

Grief is natural, and sadness at the death of a loved one is to be expected. But what about people who feel anger in their bereavement? Especially anger at God?

Fr. Mike shares a difficult truth for those who wish their loved ones were still with them instead of with Jesus in heaven.

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[samuelmanino]

Having lost two of my three children, I know the pain. My daughter died almost 17 years ago due to seizures from epilepsy. People have asked me, "Aren't you mad at God?" Then, 9 years ago, I lost my oldest son to cancer. Same question. I've never been mad at God. My adult children are with our Lord. Do I miss them? Terribly! But I have one adult son and two teenage grandsons. I try to live for them. My heart aches every day for the two children who are gone from my sight. But I know they are with God. It gives me some peace. Thank you for this, Fr. Mike. 🙏🏻

[christineoreilly]

Our son died by suicide 5 years ago and I miss him so very much. On the day he died, I crawled into God's lap and stayed there until I could stand and breathe again. Our Lord did not let me question why or stay in anger. Listening to the Lord, at times, was very hard, but I knew He was there to help me, protect me and care for me so that I could be there for my husband and 3 other children. Thank you for this beautiful message, I will pray that it reaches the people that need it.

[davidmorton]

I just lost the Priest of our church to suicide. He was young, and an awesome Priest. We don’t know why he did what he did. I Just came from his vigil and here is this video, and I was mad at him and at God but my grief had overwhelmed me. The vigil and this video has put it all in perspective. Thank you Father Mike, please, say a prayer for Father Dennis Conway, his family, and our parish, we all loved him and we will all miss him. Peace be with you.

[p-jo]

I lost two babies by miscarriage and it was painful. I take comfort that Jesus has got them and I hope one day I will be united with them.
Thank you Fr Mike. Even difficult topics need to be talked about.
🙏🏽

[rockyroad]

Thank you for the message. It’s so difficult to cope with having lost my boyfriend. He was only 27 and was killed by a drunk driver on the way home from helping a co-worker on his day off. I know he is with Jesus and the peace and love he has with God is beyond what we can ever experience on Earth… but it is so hard to keep going without him here and seeing our hopes and dreams together fade away.. especially since it was such an unfair and terrible accident. God please help me

[HopeMeller]

I experienced this revelation recently. I lost my husband unexpectedly, he was 42 years old. He suffered with much anxiety, depression and panic. And suddenly in my grief I thought: It's selfish of me to want him back with me on Earth when I know he is so free in Heaven. He has no more worry or fear or sadness. He gets to watch over me and our loved ones. And now it's my job to just be the person he loved. It's my job to keep living. I miss him terribly, but I'm not selfish enough to wish him away from where he is supremely happy now. I'll join him in eternity someday...and then finally we'll always get to have another day together forever.

[mariaschwab]

I miss my mom every moment. She died September 2024. At her wake, my brother told a story of our mom telling him (when he was six and the principal of our school had died) to never be mad at God, there is a plan for everything. My mom was at home in hospice, I was her primary caregiver. I grieve, but also know she is out of pain.

[michelejones]

My husband passed away August 29th of this year. He was 52 years old. This came as a complete shock and surprise to me. When the state police call you at work, you know it’s not going to be good news. I was in total disbelief. I couldn’t drive myself home from work. He seemed fine when he left for work that morning. He died at work of a heart attack. Totally unexpected. He wasn’t particularly religious, so I pray for his soul. I don’t know what God’s plan is in this, but I know God does indeed have a plan. I still emotionally can’t come to grips with this. I miss him so much.

[PatriciaRohena]

Thank you Father Mike, I just lost my mom three weeks ago from Pancreatic cancer. This week are the services and I am most grateful for being her caregiver for about 20 years. She had RA and suffered many health issues. Every Sunday she received communion at home and had the anointing of the sick towards the end of her life. I will miss her terribly but I know she is rejoicing with God. I think all that time I took care of her God was preparing me for this moment. I am sad, but she is not suffering anymore.

[serevilos]

My mother died last December 4. Her healing was my daily prayer, my every mass intention the last 3 years. That day when the ER nurses asked us to sign the DNR form, we refused several times. We were asked to let go of our mother. With a heavy heart, we called our parish priest for her last sacrament. We let God do what He wanted. God in His great mercy, sent our Mother home to Him and He gave us peace despite our pain.

[mariod]

As someone who lost his Father this year I can say will full confidence that you said everything with grace, respect and with a loving caring tone. You are the perfect person to deliver that message Father Mike. God Bless!!!

[johnslaughter]

God called my 12-year old son. That was 23-1/2 years ago. I still miss him; sometimes I even choke up when I talk about him. But, I know he is with God and I'm doing my best that I'll join him when it is my time. I think the hardest thing I had to do was not asking, "Why?" God's way is not our way. He is infinite wisdom. I just remember that not a sparrow falls from the sky that He gave the nod.

[peeshyholland]

My almost three year old son drowned in a neighbors swimming pool. He was in a coma for 21 days. This tragedy drove me so close to Jesus. I never was mad at him. And like you said I was very sad for a very long time. It took me five years to even feel somewhat better. One day I was looking out my kitchen window and saw some young boys getting into trouble and I thought my son doesn’t have to go through the pains of bullying or getting in to trouble. He’s in Heaven with Jesus and he’s my little saint. I’m going to see him again.

[philiptamer]

My wife died VERY YOUNG in a car wreck and we were about to have a child . Mandy was that once in a lifetime schoolteacher and when she died I was VERY ANGRY We were VERY involved in church, volunteering WEEKLY .I HATED GOD, ANGRY AT HIM AND BECAME A NOT SO NICE PERSON Now after a LOT of years I'm back in church again, the anger is STILL THERE SOMEWHAT, STILL NOT A VERY NICE PERSON BUT IM ON A ROAD TO REDISCOVERING MY FAITH .

[biancadizon]

Thank you for this message Fr. Mike. I lost my baby boy at 21 weeks over a year ago and it completely broke me. It was my first pregnancy, and my husband and I were already struggling to get pregnant, as it took us almost 2 years to finally get the positive pregnancy test. My faith was definitely shaken after we lost our baby and I relate so much to how angry I was at God. It was even so hard for me to pray. I just kept asking God why? How could He let this happen? But I know God is also grieving and mourning with us, and I take comfort now in knowing that my baby never knew pain, harm, or anything bad. He only knew love from within the womb and when he woke up, he was immediately with God and his love and grace. It’s taken a lot of healing and time but now I can say my faith has gotten stronger because of this immense grief that will always be with me. Praying for all those who are grieving and mourning losses 🙏🏼❤️

[rawraw]

Thank you, Father Mike. My sister passed 17 months ago. Next to my daughter, she was the person I was closest to. The more time that has passed, the angrier I have been feeling. But…of COURSE I am so happy she is with Jesus and no longer suffering. She is home. Thank you for the reminder! Prayers for you. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

[teekayfourtwon]

My wife and I had three children die in utero. I have dealt with grief and anger for over ten years. I never thought of it this way. Thank you Fr. Mike, this is something I needed to hear.

[Peacelovinggrannie]

I lost my husband to Motor Neurones disease. It was God who helped my children and I through it! A couple of things happened we feel was divine intervention - giving us the strength to go through it and my husband a peaceful death.
Never ever thought about blaming God.
Sometimes life just happens!

[cy]

My father passed away unexpectedly at the age of 56. I happened to talk him that morning and later that day I received a phone call he passed away. I remember being angry, which I understood later was part of the grieving process. I recall asking God why he would take our father away from our mother and away from his children. I just couldn't understand why it happened. I felt I was in a bad dream that I would never wake up from. Back then grief counseling wasn't available so I had to work through it on my own. One evening I was incredibly despondent and was sobbing uncontrollably. In that moment I felt God's presence very strongly and He was telling me everything was okay, my dad was with Him. Thank you Father Mike, you are very kind.

[jenni_d]

Thank you, Fr. I lost my father on Valentine’s Day and I felt an overwhelming feeling of anger. Then I realized that my father is in Heaven with God. Sometimes, it’s not enough to be consoled. The realization comes like an epiphany - and that is when God is speaking directly to our hearts.