Do You Feel You’re Giving Too Much in Relationships? (Matthew Hussey)

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Do you ignore red flags?

Do you feel like you give too much in your relationships?

Do you brush things under the carpet when someone violates your boundaries?

If so, this week’s video is specifically for you…

The richness and depth of a true connection can only come from giving other people the chance to reciprocate your warmth, kindness, and giving nature…

Because while it might feel selfless or nurturing to pour into others without receiving in return – it can actually backfire, weaken your connection, and make you feel resentful.

I promise that if you find the courage to be honest, you’ll find more satisfaction, fulfillment, and happiness in your relationships.

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[sqoishicasette]

*Being overly giving without receiving is the mantra to end up with narcissistic and emotionally unavailable people*
Goes for both men and women

[meesamagill]

Im no longer settling for the kind of relationship where theres no reciprocation. Fed up of giving my all and getting nothing in return

[Cookingwithkryskrys]

A person who'd abandon you for voicing your needs was going to eventually abandon you anyway. Things like respect, communication & honesty shouldn't be negotiable. They're the minimum. If someone can't even give you the minimum, why prolong the inevitable? Suffering in silence over silent expectations not met is the most cruel thing to do to yourself. If you avoid voicing your needs, you not only strip yourself of having met needs, you strip the other person of their chance to meet your needs & show you that they're capable of & willing to have your back. Fear of abandonment or being misunderstood is understandable b/c we're all human. But remember, what makes relationships so fun & worthy is in knowing that you found the 1 person you can be your complete vulnerable self with. If you can't even be that with someone, that defeats the purpose of choosing them out of billions of people/options to be with. Give yourself the permission to speak & live in your truth. The right person will respect you for having a voice, not abandon you for it

[cococha]

over giving and getting nothing back in a relationship can be really exhausting. It can led to emtional break down for both men and women.

[mao]

As I guy, this is basically how I live my life, and I'm sure a lot of men go through this too. I am someone who gives gives and gives, and I hardly ever receive. My relationship is probably 90/10, and that's being generous, and it is quite painful when you are with someone you love so much, you give them everything, basically hand them over your self and soul, and that person in return does nothing and gives you nothing. And I am not talking about material things, I am talking about everything in general. I know this video is aimed towards women, but I can't help to think that men actually suffer from this far more, because society today expects men to be the support, the pillars of the relationship. In many relationships (not all), the woman rely on men, but who do we rely on? In my case, I have no one to rely on but myself. And the funny/ironic thing is that if someone came to me and told me that his/hers relationship was anything like mine, I would with no hesitation tell them "leave him/her" but when you are living it, it's a whole different story. I feel like I am being taken advantage of, and despite knowing that, it's hard to leave, especially when you have invested nearly 10 years into the relationship. The thought of leaving and having to start fresh is very scary, and emotionally taxing... The sad part about this is that many men suffer like this, but we have no one to talk to, because if we open up about it, we are seen as weak and unreliable, so we have to suffer in the shadow and alone, while pretending to be ok when we are not.

[MissSunshine]

People go crazy once you speak up & set boundaries like “you’ve changed :/“ yeah no shit I’m doing what’s best for me once

[mins]

When he said “ the amount they give, they don’t feel worthy of it..” that hit home sooo hard that I just started sobbing .

[katieboyle]

This is the best lesson I’ve ever learned. Putting yourself first in a relationship isn’t a bad thing - it’s necessary. This includes communicating your needs, standards, and boundaries. I am a much happier person and better partner because I learned to have honest, hard conversations with people. I may wear my heart on my sleeve, but I don’t just give it away at the same time. Great video 👍🏻

[RYEANkindaAWESOME]

Two years in and I broke off a relationship where I gave and gave. I’m drained and I want to focus on my worth! I’m battling with thinking I’ll be alone forever - but it’s a lie I’m telling myself and I realize that. Thank you

[jvstkiki]

I over think everything when it comes to all relationships

[JustSamPlays]

I gave everything I could, I wore my heart on my sleeve and loved so much despite not feeling it myself, I told her my needs and she left me saying it’s not who she is as a person. It’s hard, it was last night and I’m struggling but your videos are really helping. Thank you.

[sarahaverytrealestate]

“...pain doesn’t deprives me from being happy lack of growth is...” Wow, 😍😍😍

[taranjain]

This is me bro. Sometimes people just don't give back to you and then you don't feel like giving that much anymore because people take advantage of you. Especially those people you thought were your friends don't seem to appreciate all that I do for them. Give to those people who deserve your time and energy rather than wasting it on people who never reciprocate...

[ChocoParfaitFra]

I really feel like he's talking about me

[milaalt]

"And then one day you may exode." Matthew Hussey
Eerily raise my hand because I did.

[chsetheun]

When you mentioned that part of about 3 years and putting your foot down. Literally just happened to me. 3 years in, been giving the whole time, then started asking for things i needed and the relationship ended. Good life lesson though.

[danielbryce]

I like how you said “continue to give, but communicate your needs”

All other advice I’ve received was “stop giving, or don’t give so much”.

Sadly, I did exactly what you recommend toward the end of my last marriage. I tried communicating my needs, even saying “no” to all the constant requests for help. In marriage counseling she accused me of “only giving to get”. I was shocked and floored.

We didn’t last much longer after that.

[Lenalight]

This is like you read my mind posting this video. It’s been four years and I’ve been wishing he treated me in a special way that I treat him. I communicated that to him several times and he turns it around and makes me sound that he already does these things and makes me sound like I’m just emotional. I feel like he takes things for granted that I do for him and doesn’t reciprocate that for me.

[Miffinloop]

This is so true for all of my friendships. Thank you for pointing this out for me. I realize that I do not want to point things out because I know that people will leave, and I feel unworthy of having my needs met, then eventually realizing that pointing things out only makes people pretend to meet my needs, for none other than pleasing me. I feel unworthy of being pleased. Everything makes sense now..

[CP-bopr]

I told my partner my needs and all I was given was "okay I get it"....and I'm aware I have an anxious attachment style, but if im going through a personal struggle and I turn to my partner to complain and ask what I need right now and just not even get it back hurts me so much. I see the red flags, but when I bring it up he plays victim and it makes me feel bad