Kids In Rental Flats: How Does Living In Small Spaces Really Affect Children? | Talking Point

There are over 23,000 children living in public rental housing in Singapore. These are households that the government reserves for low-income families at a subsidized rate. Beyond space constraints, what impact does growing up in rental housing have on children? To find out, Talking Point puts three kids through a series of tests – academic and mental – to find out what’s beyond plain sight. We also get a closer look at a new boarding facility for children who come from rental housing.

About the show:
Talking Point investigates a current issue or event, offering different perspectives to local stories and revealing how it all affects you.
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[renji]

I dont usually post comments in YT but this episode really resonated with me. I've stayed in a 2 room HDB rental flat for close to 30 years from my kindergarden days until my mid 30s. So I thought I would like to share some perspectives and personal experience. Apologies in advance if my experience is a bit too long.

From my kindergarden days to my primary school days, I thought living in a 2 room HDB rental flat was a norm so I didnt' really had any issues. When it came to secondary school, I realised most of my peers are living in 3 to 5 rooms flats, with them getting their own room. I was envious of people having their own room as I sleep in the living room with the parents taking the bedroom. I would say self-esteem is one of the biggest issues(even till today, I don't tell anyone I used to stay in a 2 room HDB rental flat). I was very worried friends would ask to visit my house and I always have to find reasons to turn them down. I will always shut off whenever they talk about families or their house as my parents also divorced when I was in secondary 1. My dad then stayed with me and things actually went downhill from there as my mum used to be the one paying the rental fee and utilities bill. Didn't do well in my studies before I went into ITE, served my 2 years in national service and then went to polytechnic for 3 years.

I still remembered HDB calling me on a few occasions when I was in poly, reminding me that since my mum has taken her name out from the rental flat, my dad and I are not supposed to be staying in the flat anymore. I was quite stressed whenever I received those calls, but somehow gotten used to it. When I graduated from poly(mid 20s) I managed to find a job which paid me 1.7k as my starting salary. After a few years and changing company, I was earning around low 2K per month and I thought maybe it's time I should try applying for a flat with my dad since it is always better to have your own place. HDB rejected my application, stating that I have close to 10K in rental arrears so my HDB loan application was rejected. I then arranged for a repayment plan with them and subsequently cleared it. At the same time, I've also completed my part time degree as I see that it is the only way I could ever afford a flat(since my dad has never worked in his life before, he has no CPF or savings on his own). I applied and successfully balloted for a 4 rooms BTO flat in a non mature estate when I was around 30 years old and has moved in since 2020.

My own personal thoughts? I've always felt to this day then whatever you do, you will always lag behind as compared to peers who has a better situation than you. Now you may say rental flat doesn't play a part, but it actually links to a lot of things. For example, your parents will never have a place of their own if they are not going to stay with you. So you have to stay with them, but this would affect your relationships and potential marriages as well as not many women would want to stay with their in-laws. Then there's the issue of privacy, esp when you are a teenager growing up and actually yearns for some personal space but does not have much.

Do I feel bitter towards my parents? Yes, i don't deny that when I was growing up, but over the past few years, I understand this could also be due to influence from their previous generation whereby they do not really focused much on financial security.

In my 38 years of life, I've never ever know anyone with my circle that stays in a 2 room rental flat before so yes I would agree self-esteem and anxiety will be one of the key issues affecting these children. I'm still suffering from low self esteem till this date. I still remembered and feel very embarrased and anxious till this date whenever I remembered an incident when my ex colleagues sent me home after I gotten drunk from a company event. My only consolation was there I dont have any siblings to to fight for the limited space that I have.

My advice to children facing this situation? 1. Get as high an education as possible, even if it meant working to put yourself through school (My fees in ITE was covered by bursary, my fees in poly was covered by my mum's CPF and I paid for my degree while working part-time)

2. It is OK to feel low-self esteem at this point of your life, but do not let this situation dictate how your future will be. More often than not, you will definitely lag behind your peers not matter how well you do, but try and enjoy the few positives things that you can find from your life. I think I broke down once during poly in front of a friend without telling them the reason why. The stress accumulated over the years, from a broken family, financial issues to a place that does not belong to you and threats of eviction is constantly there.

3. Get a grasp of your family's financial situation as early as possible so you know when and how you can get a place of your own(assuming your family is going to stay with you as well)

Would love to share more but I think my post is kinda long already. I pray that fewer children will experience what these kids and I've gone through, esp those from broken families and parents that are not working.

[akhbarkhanmohamad]

Wardina last words were " At least we have a rental flat others are worst"that speaks of real gratefullness.She look the saddest.

[th]

I feel so bad for Wardina… She is being robbed of her childhood…. Having to be a substitute mother for her younger brother and all.

[leewn]

Wong Hai Feng is so adorable and happy. It may be a small space but it sure reflects the love his parents have for him and brought him up well to have self respect. May he grow up to be a successful individual cherishing his parental love.

[peterma]

Yes, living in small rental flats do present some problems but I believe the bigger issue is living in poverty. You can adapt to living in small spaces but if you don’t have enough money to buy food or if you have to babysit your siblings, you can’t adapt to that. I think it’s very misleading to focus on small rental flats and not focus on the bigger factor which is poverty.

[yokeshin]

I grew up as part of a 6 member family (parents plus 4 kids of similar ages) in a rented room, with communal hall, kitchen, old styled toilet and bathroom in the back of the three storey house. No car and no electronics. Everything was a luxury. Didn't go to Uni as I didn't want to burden my parents with the cost of education and went out to work to save for my trip to the UK for training.Left home at 22. So I understand the the problems though the time wasn't the same. Simply knew my parents were borrowing to keep a roof over our heads and food in our stomachs. Eternally grateful to them. RIP mum and dad.

[MaxJoseph]

Actually also really happy for Munah for her “career pivot”. For those who have watched her grow from her previous YouTube appearances to now on CNA, happy for and proud of you, Munah! Go from strength to strength from here 💪🏼💪🏼

[lwan]

Just hope that Wardina's brother grows up to appreciate his sister and the sacrifice she made to be his second mother at such a young age.

[andromeda]

I felt it wasn't really right to make the parents respond to the test results in front of the camera. It was humiliating for them, when they were already struggling to make ends meet. One can always just narrate what their response was. Felt sorry for them.

[YashaClone]

Living in a cramped flat is a symptom of many other issues, not just the size of the apartment they stay in. These children are stressed because they are parentified, made responsible for household responsibilities beyond their years and are constantly stressed about money and all the implications of not having any (school fees, utilities, food, roof over head). A child should not have to be forced to care for their siblings full time, a child should not have to worry about the parents having money, should not have to go work to supplement the household income, or save to buy a house, etc. To lump it all up and say its the stress of cramped living conditions is oversimplification of a multitude of other issues. Why was that one child away from mom for that period of time? Where is the father? What “issues” did the mom have?

[TheFarhanaAnna]

I grew up in a single parent household and in a private rental flat. I am grateful for the support we had from our extended family and from various organisations to help with my studies, our household expenses and bills. It was a huge relief to my mum when my sister and I were awarded education bursaries and I even had the opportunity to study abroad. I am rooting for all 3 kids to flourish despite life’s circumstances. It does not matter where you come from but how you perform. Education is the ticket out of poverty and breaking the cycle.

[sayurik]

CNA should interview this sociologist in NTU Prof Teo You Yenn. She wrote this amazing book called “this is what inequality looks like” that had many meaningful and thoughtful observations about people living in rental flats and their situations.

[stellaliu]

I grew up in a 13 sqm single room with my parents and sister and had a not-bad childhood. Yes, I dreamed of a bigger home and private space, but it was not a huge issue. I didn't need ten rooms to enjoy reading or daydreaming.
After we moved to Canada, I rented a laneway house built upon a garage. Almost all the classes of my older son lived in 5-6 bedroom houses with prices higher than 5M. However, he did not struggle with this because there were too many important things in his life.
Living in a small space lets us know how big the outside world and the future should be. And every time we moved into a bigger place, it was a joyful life experience.

[lanaitgirl]

hai feng sounds like a really smart kid

[boingocphan]

My worst experience living in a small flat was having to hear my parents’ quarreling!

[chanchan]

Breaking out of this cycle is very hard but not impossible. I hope they continue to work hard with the support of all those around them. Speaking as somebody who lived in the same type of 2-room rental flat, but managed to graduate from a local u debt-free. There will be many sacrifices to be made, but the journey was worth it. Shall not bore everyone with long stories, but willing to share small tips if anyone is interested.

[lildon]

As someone who has spent some time in my childhood living in a small space, I appreciate this video. However, there is a major confounding variable here - and that is the poor financial situation of the family. If living space is the parameter being studied, this should have also looked at kids from higher-income families who also live in a small space. Otherwise, I think it's great that there is a program that gives a bigger space to kids though. I hope it continues and supports more children in the future.

[lowwastehighmelanin]

The issues these children face remind me of my wife and the difficulties she had growing up...but in Austria. It's odd to me that this is such a universal problem with zero consistent fixes for it.

Truly rooting for all of these kiddos.

[eddynoir]

When you have a psychologist next to you eyeballing what you circle as your answers, the results will not be accurate as they could be made under pressure. I don't understand why she can't let them have some personal and private space to fill up that questionnaire.

[danieljong]

Of the 3 people, Wardina is the most pitiful, she is already working to help support the family by sending parcels. Not easy for her. I pray that Wardina and the family can be more open to each other. To wardina, dont give up. God bless u and ur family. (M'sian here, March 28, 23)