Are You Smart Enough To Get These Nerdy Jokes?

Get your PhD in humor with this collection of intellectual jokes.

We pulled the best gags from a recent Reddit thread of intellectual jokes and illustrated them as cartoons in order to test your knowledge of chemistry, physics, math, Latin, computer science and more. If you don't laugh, you probably should've paid more attention in school.

Adapted from this BuzzFeed post:

Animation by Kevin McShane

Voiceover by Kevin McShane, Hillary Levine, Kate Reynolds, Andrew Ilnyckyj, and Henry Goldman

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MUSIC:

DianisMult - Comedy by Vyacheslav Zhmurin
used via Creative Commons Attribution License

SOUND EFFECTS:

Bar atmosphere - Not So Busy by fogma

metal pop foley by Alternicity

01 baby crying hard by PickleJones

cupboard creak 3 by Corsica_S

keyboard-typing by Anton

rattle1-2 by acrober

Body Fall Over by raubana

broken_string by alexbird

swosh-08 - "stick cutting air" by qubodup

Socket Wrench by kklab5050

buzzer by guitarguy1985

Desk Thud by JWMalahy

DST-AncientCurse-III by Striderjapan

cartoon fast footsteps-mg by martian

Ding Ding Small Bell by JohnsonBrandEditing

Calm Morning Outdoor Ambience by blouhond

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[aislinga]

A neutron walks into a bar and orders a round of drinks. When he pulls out his wallet, the bartender says "no charge for you"

[rosecoloredchloe]

So G, C, and E Flat walk in to a bar. The Bartender says, " Sorry we don't serve minors here."

[clairekross]

I tell bad chemistry jokes because all the other ones argon.

[emilydraper]

I'd make a chemistry joke, but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

[omgmeepmeeeplol]

A boy says to his dad "I'm cold".

The day says "Well go stand in the corner".

The boy asks, "Why?".

The dad replies, "Because it's 90 Degrees!"

[cassandratodd]

When I found out Oxygen and Magnesium were dating, I was like "OMg!"

[pashaefendi]

The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.

[aislingwhelan]

Einstein, Pascal and Newton are playing hide and seek. Einstein turns around and counts, Pascal runs off and hides but Newton stays behind Einstein, takes out a piece of chalk and draws a square that is 1m2 in size.
When Einstien finishes counting, he turns around and says
"I found you Newton!!"
Newton replies
" No, you found one Newton per square metre. You found Pascal"

[unknowinglyawesome]

A roman walks in to a bar, holds up two fingers and says "five beers please"

[georgeplith]

Two scientists walk into a bar

The first says “I’ll have some H2O.”

The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.”

Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

bye

[onandonandomnom]

there are 6 people on a boat and 7 cigarretes, but they don't have a lighter, so how do they smoke? they throw a cigarrete overboard and now the boats a cigarrete lighter

[ashbylaws]

hey dude, do you know any jokes about sodium hypobromite?

NaBrO

[harpy]

A proton and an electron walk into a bar.
The electron says to the proton, "I hate my job..."
The proton says, "Oh, don't be so negative!"
... You can burn me now...

[emilyle]

This jerk in my class's name is Atom he makes up everything

[Bsusfilms]

Silver and platinum are walking down the street, and they see gold. Silver greets him saying: "Au"!

[Michael-vtuw]

1.) H2O2 is poisonous 
2.) It could be either a boy or a girl.
3.) In computer science, Arrays are lists of things but you must specify the number of things in the array. In this case the programmer specified 2 things in the list but put down three and the last thing put down was an "off by one error" and his array was off by one. 
4.) A chemist would pronounce it "un-ionized" and a plumber would pronounce it "union-ized"
5.) Helium is  a noble gas. Noble gases don't chemically react under normal conditions.
6.) Entropy is the measure of disorder in the universe. Entropy always goes up according the second law of thermodynamics so it is therefore never "what it used to be"
7.) Absolute zero is zero Kelvin (0K)
8.) 1023 MB is one off of a GB or a "gig"
9.) In Latin, Martini is the plural of Martinis
10.) Mew is the symbol used in physics to denote the coefficient of friction. So the one with the lowest mew will slide quicker.
11.) Hard to explain but in programs, there are "if then" statements and she said "if there are eggs then get a dozen" that is parallel to the if than statements used in comp. sci. so the programmer got a dozen loaves of bread. (you really need to know java to get this one and the 3rd one, its just hard to explain if you dont know java)
12.) You have mass at church. The Higgs- Boson particle is used in physics to explain why things have mass.
13.) Kleptomaniacs steal things or "take things, literally"
14.) Buddhist Monks seek Nirvana, which is the state of being "one with everything".
15.) This is a video about jokes, rhetorical questions are ones that aren't supposed to be answered, so the question "what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question" is a rhetorical question so it's not supposed to be answered, which is also why its a joke.

[RoseUchihachan]

"i think I lost an electron"
"are you positive?"

[TheAstrobiologistOW]

I would tell you that joke about quantum physics again, but it's never the same twice.

[mrresetti]

knock
knock
knock knock
knock knock knock
knock knock knock knock knock
whose there?




Fibonacci

[grimreaper]

Two atoms walk into a bar, the first one says "I think I lost an electron", "Are you sure?" said the second one, to witch the first one replied "I'm positive !"