A Son's Heartfelt Message to his Dad with Dementia - Behind the News

Jacob is one the 3 million Australians regularly caring for a loved one at home. His dad Peter has dementia so Jacob helps his mum look after him.

JACOB JAMES: Hello, my name is Jacob. I'm 11-years-old. What I like about my dad is that, he's always here for me, he's all ears and then in times of need when I need him he'll always be there to give me kisses and hugs. That's really why I love my dad so much. Yes, he forgets things, but he's still my dad. It's not going to change the way I talk to him, or the way he talks to me.

CATHY JAMES: He's a pretty special man, my husband. Three years ago, we noticed that Pete was starting to forget things. Not understanding what was going on. We knew it was coming, but having the diagnosis was the hardest. They diagnosed Pete with early-onset dementia, Alzheimer's.

JACOB JAMES: Every day I wake up in the morning, I get dressed, get his breakfast and everything ready and then I'll get the lunches ready and make sure dad’s got everything he needs. Then I'll make sure dad goes to work before 8am, because he needs to leave before then. Our roles have kind of swapped. Like, I'm now looking after him instead of him looking after me. But for many years, dad has done that and in an excellent way. I think of it like I'm paying him back for all the good things he's done for me. It's actually kind of fun looking after dad. I really enjoy it. I like putting a smile to his face.

JACOB JAMES: I used to get cranky with dad because he was forgetting everything, and I had no idea about dementia at all. And I used to get really cranky with him and when I finally figured it out, I was, like, what is this? And mum explained it to me really well and I was, like, I'm so sorry, dad, for all the times I yelled at you. I'm so sorry. I couldn’t get over the fact I didn't know about my dad, but I was yelling at him because he was not remembering things.

CATHY JAMES: For me, I go, OK, we've got to do this, this and this. Well, we can't do that anymore, we just got to do one thing and then wait and have that finished and do the next. It’s no use talking about what's happening tomorrow or what's happening in an hour, it's just what's happening now. What we're trying to do is make sure Pete always knows he's so loved and he's family and that's what we do, and I'll always make sure he's OK. Some days are harder than others for Jake. He's having to say now to his own dad, dad, it's OK, don't worry about it. It blows me away how a little boy can do that.

PETE JAMES: He's my crutch for one of the better term. He just helps me out with whatever I need to do. Whatever I do, he's there to help me. He makes sure I get up on time, if I get lost, if I lose my phone or lose my keys, he's always there to help me to do that stuff. He's an amazing young man.

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