Self-Neutrality: What It Is And How To Practice It

[incognitoe]

This is outrageously therapeutic. I'm a grown man crying at a desk at work.

[amandarattray]

HEIDI! YOU'RE HELPING ME FIX MY LIFE SCARILY QUICKLY. Each video is another stepping stone! I could never tell you all you've helped me regain...

[jerry.cray_II]

I learned to stop gambling my self-worth and value on the outcome of any given situation. Afraid of making mistakes, or failure, embarrassment, or rejection of any kind. Shame led me to believe that my value was supposed to be earned, when instead it is generated internally. I don’t earn or lose value, I am value. I am worthy. That mindset shift changed everything for me.

I no longer fear trying things or going for what I want because I’ve detached my worth from the outcome. My worth is always intact. That is the understanding that was the missing link to my journey to a secure lifestyle.

Love your work Heidi. Thank you.

[alinei.]

"THERE ISN'T A
PERSON YOU
WOULDN'T LOVE
IF YOU COULD READ THEIR
STORY."
Marjorie P. Hinkley

A saying i‘ve always tried to take at heart but never before for my own story…

THANK YOU HEIDI! You‘re videos and clear explantations help me with so many walls I hit in my journey so far… I appreciate your work very much!

[MichaelRyanEpley]

05:24 "We cannot personal develop our way out of it. We cannot date our way out of it. We cannot succeed our way out of it." I love that! I mean I know it, I just haven't been doing it.

[oldskooldriver]

The most amazing feeling in life was the day when my inner shame lifted away and disappeared. It was after realizing my ex wife had leveraged my inner shame for years, added to it, amplified it, and made it her tool to control me. My inner shame returns at time, but I know what it is. This video is such an awesome talk on how shame works invisibly in some, and I wish this had been available 20 year ago when I was married.

[the.emc]

"There must be an explanation for whatever has been going on for you." <- This is so liberating. <3

[hardenedsap]

My dad told me he was going to break my will during whippings. That I would be a whore just like my mom.
Your videos are helping me heal decades of pain and self-rejection and abhorrence. Thank you for making this free and accessible.

[asmundlvgreen]

Wow, I’m 44 but yet learning so much from you. Recently been diagnosed with burnout, which I’ve now found is due to me hiding from shame and low self-esteem through creating a false «I’m better than all of you» identity which eventually made me break down. Really interesting and helpful videos Heidi - thank you

[sovereign_soul_]

Since i recently found your channel, ive been binging your videos and this one is BAR NONE my favorite of all of them. Very inspiring and uplifting. Thanks so much for all you do. you're already proving a prominent role in my long-overdue healing journey.

[brianr]

I think I came to Self neutrality on my own a few years ago. The term 'self love' alwayse made me cringe and seemed like a fairy tale. So I managed to get myself to a place where I no longer did 'self hate.' I gave myself the same respect that I would give a coworker or a stranger. Seemed like a good comprimise, but still haven't reached the next step yet.

[kristina]

This is so helpful. I am bipolar 1 now in remission. I carry so much shame about what my parents and children suffered. I try to stay in the present, but when my thoughts wander to the past, I am filled with regret and shame. Thank you for offering this information.

[geetu]

You’ve nailed healing on another level… you end up feeling good about yourself by seeing good in others 🌸

[shimmeringchimps]

Heidi, you truly have a gift of communicating complex topics in a concise, logical, yet compassionate way. You are helping so many people! ❤️

[stjameshamat]

I am human like everybody else and I am not above having the same human needs and emotions as everybody else, nor is it shameful to have those needs and emotions. That is a realisation I really needed. Thank you Heidi.

[angel_]

you telling me to stop living in my magical fantasy world made me wanna petulantly huff like a child and reflexively say no. 😆 lmao. but maybe it really is time to let my little magical fantasy future go. who’s to say im not that cool future version of myself right now, and whats stopping me from just.. being that person right now? my fantasies were such a blanket of comfort, something i could always indulge in and escape off to when everything became overwhelming or sad. it’s such a conflicting feeling to have to let that go. letting reality set in is a sobering experience. those exact visions of my future will never truly exist. those exact versions of my future self will never truly exist. but it doesn’t mean that something just as, if not more, fulfilling is waiting for me around the corner, if only i can bring myself to the present and acknowledge and appreciate myself in my entirety, all aspects, fully and unconditionally. thanks heidi. some of these thoughts need time to seep in, but im glad i have this reality check. it’s alright to have visions of the future, i know, but i can’t let those visions fog up my present so heavily that i can’t take steps forward in any direction. it does a great disservice to present me. i just realised that now. let me not run towards a future that ill never be able to catch up to, and focus on how i exist in my environment in the present.

[peke]

10:40 Become curious about our own emotional responses
13:20 Start applying the same type of reasoning to everybody else
16:51 Nobody is the exception to the aforementioned rule
19:59 Refuse to engage in magical thinking
22:13 Observe our emotional experiences without shaming ourselves for them

[abifriend]

Never in all my years have searching have I come across a goldmine of information such as this. Thank you so much Heidi you are saving lives. X

[oftenlucid]

One of my favorite sayings is "Life is not what you see, but the light you see it in". You can often choose to see things in a different light. That is empowering.

I also really liked "The fact that we feel all that stuff is what connects us to other people". . .

"I went to the mountain top looking for victory. But I found it in the valley, you can't take my joy from me". Michelle Shocked.

[darkrebel]

Solzhenitsyn once said "The line between good and evil runs through the heart of every man." Nobody is inherently good or evil, or even fully good or evil at any point in their life.