What Parental Burnout Looks Like (and How to Avoid It)

Raising children is not easy, and parents can get burnt out just like anyone else. But research shows that parental burnout seems to be unique compare to other kinds of burnouts.

*This episode was written and recorded before most parents around the world started homeschooling because of coronavirus safety measures. Some of the suggestions in the video don't apply in times of social distancing, but the big ones do so we still felt this was an important video to share right now. You're doing great, parents!

Hosted by: Anthony Brown
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[sunshineandjiff]

I’m a SAHM and any time I express my burnout I just get told how lucky I am and that they wish they could stay home, so screaming into the void is my only option.

[tinycatfriend]

i'd love to see more research on parental burnout with disabled kids (i was one). they constantly have unmet needs, not enough resources and are put on pedestals as being inspirational. my mom raised me alone, with another kid, while on welfare and going through nursing school. NO ONE should have to do that without help. parental burnout can disrupt attachment and affect the mental health of the kids, as well

[JuicyCrone]

I now have the language to explain what I'm feeling. 16 years of single parenthood has definitely taken its toll.

[PirateOfTheNorth]

Being a single parent during the covid19 outbreak is tough.

[daeken]

I've never clicked a video so fast in my life.

Signed,
- Exhausted parent

[Natashea]

I think the problem with our generation or current times is that we don’t raise children in communities anymore. Each Family just does their own thing in their bubbles instead of leaning on the family or community to help balance out all the activities that take to raise children. That’s how it is in many cultures and unfortunately that is not a normal thing in American culture that you lean on your extended family and the community around you to ensure that your kids are well taken care of. So of course you’re burnt out!

[fg]

I love our 14 month old daughter more than anything in the world but at the same moment I’m not ashamed to admit that the day when my mother in law takes her for 6-7 hours is my favorite day of the week. When I drop her off and walk to my car I almost fly from knowing that I’m about to have few hours to myself, few hours of freedom😍😍😍😍😍😍

[juliebella]

I love being a Mom, what burns me out is never enough money. They make it so expensive it's beyond understanding. I often have to choose between something for me or for my child, obviously I give it to my child which only lessens my health and makes me more tired than I should be. I don't get burn out from my child, I get burnt out trying afford all that we need and having to say hot water heater or washer gets fixed this year and the older they get the more their clothes cost, the more they eat etc. I love that growing, but my goodness, try buying a whole winter wardrobe, then a spring wardrobe, then a summer wardrobe and they grow every few months so....it's not the children's fault at all this society is just beyond sick when it comes to costs of basic needs. Pay for trash, water, electricity and taxes, etc. etc. What's left for the family?

[leenfira]

Yes ! Finally someone said something! Parents ( mothers usually) around me are always tired. They refused to leave their kids with a relative, refuse to hire a cleaning service and prepare all meals for the kids ( even if the kid can make a sandwich by himself). The fact is that they have been taught that the mother who enjoys her time is a bad mom. They're basically don't want be judged harshly by others.

[crazeekids]

I have been parenting for 20 years, 13 of those as a single parent. I had so much hope as a new parent. Even up through the middle school years, I was still going strong. But these past 5 years, since I hit my 40’s, have been so hard. I just feel exhausted and am ready for them to be grown and on their own. I love my kids, but I am physically and emotionally drained.

[JP-qxwb]

I don’t think you can avoid burnout as a parent. Its just how it goes once you have kids . Never ending exhaustion.

[lyndsaybrown]

Aka, how to survive corvid quarantine if you're a parent?

[aBitSaltyRN]

Parenting burnout is absolutely real. Self-care is key to fighting burnout, but finding time and energy for that, especially if you're a single parent or have a spouse with a heavy work schedule, is damn near impossible.

I imagine there's a lot of burnout happening right now with parents stuck at home with their kids for weeks or months straight with nowhere to go and ideas for activities dwindling. Especially with many families experiencing financial distress.

[Ahuka]

I'm really loving Anthony. He is doing a great job.

[ZeusTheIrritable]

I'm the father of a 16 year old, a 13 year old and a 6 year old. I could have told these researchers about parental burnout without all the trouble of doing a study. It is real. It sucks. Therapy helps.

[Celeste-in-Oz]

Be interesting to hear how parents experience the stress & workload of kids with disability or chronic medical conditions.

[PRDreams]

1) If your kid has more than one extracurricular activity, that's too many. Find their passion and nurture it. It will feel more fulfilling to both of you and will make both of your day less stressful.

2) While they are doing their thing, do your thing. Stop trying to fit more crap into your schedule. Just breathe. Things will get done eventually. It's ok to be selfish for an hour or two.

3) Our kids just want a good parent. They don't care if we aren't perfect.

4) You want happy kids and your kids want a happy parent. That should be your goal. Forget about what society will say; as long as everyone at home is healthy and happy, it will be ok.

🤗❤️🤗

[rp]

I'm burned out. But I'll continue to do everything for my kids because I don't want them molested, family or not. Not risking it.

[pussehhoecouldneva]

I love my babies so much and wouldn’t trade them for the world, but it is extremely stressful.. mentally, physically & financially. I’m a single mom of 3 kids & the only “break” or adult time I get is going to work 2-3 days a week (that’s all I can afford babysitter wise) it’s mentally exhausting & I hate the stigma that mothers shouldn’t be tired/stressed out & we should just feel no other feeling but blessed & happy (which we do also) but we make mistakes, we get irritated, we get overwhelmed & believe it or not, WE ARENT SUPERHEROS. We are human beings with feelings.

[ameliatee]

I love your video. I think this pandemic has taught people the importance of multiple streams of income, unfortunately having a job doesn't mean financial security. I really appreciate the transparency and giving people a fighting chance during this troubling times.