Dork Cube!

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Music:

[Develan]

Mine arrived with a picture of me opening the dork cube inside. I never even ordered one.

[blackdome]

My box just broke my jaw. There wasn't even anything in there to do so, I just opened the box and suddenly had a broken jaw.

[moej]

My dork cube just arrived, I got a jar of lube and 10 baseballs. Thanks Jerma! #LootGet

[static-ky]

Something I'm surprised nobody mentioned after 8 years; Jerma gets the blood in his eyes as it springs out of the box, yet immediately says there's blood in the box despite being temporarily blinded. Therefore, the only way he instantly knows it's blood is because it went in his mouth too, which of course he would never forget the taste of considering his ever-climbing body count.

[henrycgs]

Mine came with this strange, fleshy, pulsating red mass. The weird part is that whenever I look at it I can't stop laughing! I know it sounds a bit strange, but trust me, it's the most hilarious thing I've ever seen! I do however have a strange feeling of guilt whenever I open the box to see it. But it's so funny... I can't help myself...

[darkjedi]

The delivery man literally just knocked on my front door and slashed my face open with a scimitar.

[theabsolutecat]

Mine had an LED clock counting down to March 23rd 2034, with a sticky note on the side saying “The day we all became free.” I can’t wait!

[morgboat]

completely overlooked joke is using Jerma’s code to save 40 cents

[Tulip_bip]

I got my own and when I looked inside, there was a smaller version of me looking into a box in a room just like mine.
then I looked up and saw that the roof was gone, revealing a giant me looking up.

[RTGame]

Well, he wasn't wrong about it being a dork cube. I just didn't expect it to literally be a container of some poor dork.

[ThePancaked]

I love how original and genuine Jerma still is. Wonder what he's worth on the steam market.

[mossy]

Lucky bastard, he got the blood drop. All I got in mine was a note saying that I had to keep my eyes on the guy slowly climbing out of it, because he can't move so long as I watch him

[itsitsitsitsits]

I thought my box was empty, but it turned out to just be filled with the passage of time. There are so many things I could have done with my life that I no longer have time for in my old age. The opportunities that lay before me disappeared the moment I opened the box. Thanks, Dork Cube!

[couchchester]

the fact that he had to kill 3 infants get the blood for this bit really shows his dedication to his craft!

[MIITRIN]

If you watch this video at 11:58:44 PM on New Year’s Eve your year will start off with Jerma throwing blood straight into his face

[rm_steele]

Finally got my Dork Cube today! I opened it, there was a polaroid of my tombstone and an SD card. On it was pictures of every house I've ever lived in, a text file containing my DNA encoding, a spreadsheet of every time I've left my house and various details about those times, and a video of me tied to a chair getting my head smashed in with a baseball bat! #LootGet !

[kappa]

if jerma did this today the cube would look like a 100% legit mystery box, and it would be completely indistinguishable from a bit until he opened it

[thebadegg]

Got mine a week ago.Opened my door to see a naked man with the words “Dork Cube” branded into his chest. The man gave me a large knife and gestured to his stomach. After cutting into him he screamed “LOOTGET!” and pulled a Funko Pop figurine of Darth Vader from his insides. 8/10 the blood was hard to clean off my porch.

[HappyChaos-jscw]

1:16 #LootGet !!! My Dork Cube came with a soulless homunculus that was identical to me in every way. Perfect for transferring my soul into upon my death!

[boodle]

got mine finally after 4 years, had a note saying they were sorry it took so long! it came with a cute star trek plushie, a few marvel pins, a sick Godzilla Poster and the head of Joseph Stalin