3 Tough truths about all people | Mel Robbins #Shorts

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It took me years to understand these 3️⃣ truths about all people.

I’m breaking down these powerful and fundamental truths that you need to accept about other people in order to live a better life on the latest episode of The Mel Robbins Podcast

You are wasting so much time, energy, and attention trying to control other people…

If you’re frustrated by the fact that your spouse or partner won’t exercise more…

If you get angry seeing how much money your daughter wastes going out every weekend…

If you’re annoyed by how stubborn your parents have become the older they get…

Me too. 🙃

Once you apply these 3️⃣ truths to your life and realize that you can’t control other people, your relationships will be WAY easier.

#melrobbins #relationshipadvice #lifelesson #melrobbinspodcast

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[tq]

Yep! Have those conversations early and often.You'll save yourself a lot of heartbreak!

[wrenchlix]

"I thought we were having fun" was what he said after a year of dating. Added to clarify that we started with the same intentions and it devolved to that statement when I said I couldn't do it anymore and deserved what I had been looking for.

[almosdezsi]

3 years, almost three years. I ended it today.

[kristiiiiiiiii]

This is what I did. I’m married to him today. It was nerve wracking, but I was at the point in life where I wasn’t going to date just to have something to do. I wanted to build a life with someone. He told me he wanted the same thing, and I’m so thankful.

[narshaee]

Iv realised this this week and said at 3am whatever is happening between us it’s destroying my soul and I just know you’re not giving me what I want and deserve. It’s hurting but I deserve to be loved respect someone to be loyal to me I’m worth way more than he’s giving.
I gave up a while ago but I just have trouble letting go.

[Wynterlass]

THIS IS SO TRUE. (My guy, he’s 8 yrs younger & we’ve been together 8 yrs as comrades) He made it very clear at the beginning. He did not want to get into a relationship, which was fine by me because I had just gotten out of a 32 year marriage. We live in the same apartment building. We have separate apts, he’s upstairs & I’m downstairs. A funny thing happened, when he told me he did not want a relationship, it hurt. Yet, he told me right up front so I didn’t spend the last few years hoping for a relationship with HIM. Instead, I got a fabulous relationship with me!!! I learned who I AM! I’m not a needy, jealous woman at all. I’m strong and talented .
People WILL SHOW YOU OR TELL you what they are… BELIEVE THEM

[AnnaSmith-bzwx]

Dr. Kate Wachs book "Relationships for Dummies" has a chapter dealing with this matter. Basically she says to only date those who from the beginning have the same relationship goals that you have.

[Remi_Taj_Nanny]

5 YEARS of my life 😢 but the saddest part of this is that it ruined my relationship with my beautiful children, I became toxic because of it 😢... Doing the hard work in therapy to become my authentic self and not allow anyone to treat me like im unworthy of love. 💔

[MikeHunthire]

This is interesting because in the comments you all are making it sound like you don’t know, but you do and you always do. When you’re a reacher, you’re the one doing most all of the work and the other person is settling for you and you know it. You’re going above and beyond to please them and you know you are. So for so many of you acting like you don’t know and it’s a surprise is interesting! Because if someone isn’t willing to put in the same amount of effort as you, they aren’t for you it’s just your turn!

[christinav]

No thanks I had a marriage of 20 years to a narcissist then I was discarded. I don’t believe in relationships anymore the word sickens me. I now believe in nurturing and preserving me. Now I’m so content with my life, I wouldn’t risk myself again!

[H.H]

Well, I asked all the right questions and he answered all the answers I wanted, ended up he was just lying to get me. So this unfortunately doesn’t work much.

[juliab]

In the last months of my dating period, I used to ask straight away, I didnt even see the point of waiting to ask. And even when some said yes thinking they d have a chance of getting their way, I spotted them quickly too (the actions didnt match the words). My boyfriend was so straight forward, both in actions and words... when it is right from both sides it just show ❤

[oper]

I realized coming out and stating every relationship has a purpose. I don’t have to be married, but I want to know that the relationship I’m in will have a purpose. If the other person doesn’t feel that desire or need for a commitment, that’s okay. I can’t control what someone else wants, but I can definitely limit how much time I give to them. Better to have relationships goals aligned, then invest your time and love.

[joys]

Have those hard conversations when dating and it makes marriage so much easier! My husband and I have never fought over money in marriage because we talked about all the details of our spending and our future expectations around money during our dating relationship. He didn’t want to share accounts and I laid out the facts on why I believed in joint finances and that was my expectation with the person I married. It wasn’t a demand on him because he wasn’t my husband and he could have walked away. We are a team and building wealth together now but neither one of us was trapped because communication happened before commitment. Same with so many other topics. I gave up some dreams because I loved what he wanted for us as a team more. Marriage isn’t hard when you talk before marriage.

[El-aitch]

This describes a “friendship” situation I had. This makes so much sense!

[soul_retreat_healing]

I agree, I think you know pretty quick whether you can see your life without that person or not, it's not that complicated unless you make it

[ladyofspa]

In addition to a brutally honest conversation on do our visions, values, timing match on relationship WITH Each Other. .. ..?
But Having an undeniable conviction within and committment to bulid and experience the relationship you desire and deserve with or without

[babetweirdgirl]

Yes. Keep the hard conversations coming as you grow together. Then it just becomes 'conversation' and it isn't hard anymore. Start like this "So I was thinking. . . What do you think?" "I noticed xyz and have a specific problem with it for this reason. Would you help me by in a very specific way?" Choose a time to bring it up when both of you are not angry. If one of you gets angry stop talking. Bring it up again later when you're cooled off.

[GinaTheSoulWorker]

Bonus tip: If they say they don’t know, don’t stay and figure it out with them. Take that answer as a no and save yourself 4 years.

[lynettejohnson]

Getting thru the difficult conversations with empathy and fairness could strengthen an already stong love bond.
Avoidance may cause doubt.