5 Practical Ways To Outsmart a Narcissist

Is there a way to outsmart a narcissist when they are so mean and calculated? If yes, how? How you be steps ahead of them and feel controlled and terrified? Let me answer these questions for you in this episode.

Chapters
00:00 Introduction
00:43 see the narcissist as they are not who you want them to be
03:41 Respond and don’t react
05:05 Have well-defined and strong boundaries
06:38 Don’t take the blame
08:05 use their personality traits against them

[sheribrogden]

When my narcissist threatened to leave me I told him "No, we will be together forever. You will never leave." He was out of the house within a week.

[itomomi]

Wasted 2 years on a narcissist which caused constant insomnia, feeling of emptiness and self doubt. Finally went no contact and starting to feel like my original self. Narcissist will not change, everything is a facade and they are not what they say they are and you point that out and you'll get gaslighted. If you suspect your partner is a narcissist, RUN AWAY and never look back!

[danicadjukic]

A narcissist's power relies in your reaction !

[laurenkoch]

I stopped reacting, played dumb but the whole time I was gaining strength and separating assets, hiding money planning. The same time willing him to change but the only one that changed was me
.27 years married done.

[queenwinning]

I was fairly new into a relationship with a narcissist. I realized it after a weekend getaway. On the trip, I was naturally smiling, happy, enjoying myself at my own expense. He was grumpy and too mighty to dare have fun. His "Good Guy" mask had slipped. When we got home, he gave me THE TALK. He pointed out my trip behavior. He said I was disobedient and had poor self-esteem. He said I didn't love myself and I was inconsiderate. He expressed he wasnt sure he would remain in the relationship. I knew this was all manipulation. He wanted control over my emotions since I was naturally happy. I wanted the breakup so badly, but wanted him to believe I didn't. I said "I've worked so hard to be yours...you can't throw it all away." I knew he wanted to devastate me. He broke it off immediately!! I was so thrilled inside. A few weeks later, he contacted to rekindle. I dodged that bullet!

[eastafrika]

The way I outsmarted the Narcissist who was my dad was to do to him what he never thought I would ever do, after he thought he broke me, which is to take him to court over my mom's property and to actually win the case. The weakness of the Narcissist is that they think you won't make it or dare act in your own favor

[kennethlapointesongwriter]

Agree. The only power they have is getting a bad reaction from you, flustering you, upsetting you, etc. If you can hold your own and NOT react, they have nothing over you.

[annsmith]

Children should be taught about narcissists when in secondary school. We need to know about these things!! I wish I had known before I got married to a child in an adults body ( who is now my ex, thank God🙏🏻) He was controlling then, but I confused it with love and got married anyway🤬🤬🤬What a truly awful life I had after that. Temper tantrum’s, violence and mental abuse.Smashing things around the house, if he couldn’t get his way😢😢.The only truly good thing to come out of this nightmare, was my two wonderful sons❤️❤️

[laurelmarshall]

The best thing I ever did to deal with a narcissist was to LEAVE them & not have ANY contact with them anymore.

[popmonika]

If you can appeal to their ego- they'll be more than happy to tell you anything or even listen to anything you advise them.

Their ego is their biggest weakness. In the long-term you can use it against them.

[rubyjet]

I never felt inferior to a narcissist because I realized that they are incapable of using logical thinking which I am quite good at. For me, this is their biggest weakness.

[maryfrances]

If you MUST deal with a narcissist, don’t tell them anything about you. Never be straightforward or honest with them, because they will use the information to try and intercept your goals or progress.

[virginialisettevarela]

"Expecting from a narcissist is like beating a dead horse" 😂 Made me laugh. So true

[nowshinahmed]

Knowing that the person is my enemy and was all the time, now I can relax. Not expecting anything from it. I think this is how I outsmart the narcissist.

[alicearcturus]

You are so right on every point. After 5 years of him being out of the house, I still have to deal with him because of family. Luckily I have no warm feelings toward him. I had to forget my ego. I don't react when he criticizes my looks or some other nonsense. I just say "that's interesting" and get back to business. I am extremely polite and nice. I am not fake because I tell him if he is happy, the family is happy. I don't expect anything from him such as getting right back to me when I message him about something someone in family needs. I just wait till he feels like it. I don't care, let him think he is in control. Someday I will never have to see him again. I feel good about myself because I have myself under control. I've come a long way.

[simonpegg]

Excellent points! Most people waste their time and energy trying to change the narc. Instead, they should be seen as what they are, which are that a narc is an incorrigible monster and strategies should be built by the abuse victim to protect oneself, like going no-contact.

[adrianmlridgewayarcmlramll]

Best advice I've ever heard, my wife is a total monster and has tortured me for 11 years of miserable marriage. Now I know how to react to her lies, projections, blaming and hatefulness. God knows what will happen when I finally file for divorce in January. Please pray for me. Adrian in Bermuda...

[ND-orso]

You are so right for us to NOT HAVE HOPE for their non fixing ways

[JessicaJLandi]

I told the toxic person I needed some distance from her insensitivity (she had always acknowledged she was insensitive and that people just needed to accept that about her). Then when I got distance and took an honest look at the whole relationship, I actually saw how toxic the friendship was and then I decided to make the distance permanent. So much peace and joy back in my life now!

[grantaugustyniak]

I’ll admit - I have used Narcissistic tactics against Narcs. As a Sigma Empath it brought me joy - I’m not gonna lie about that ither. But my most effective way to deal with Narcs is to grey rock them, ignore them & just simply be myself and walk away from them ( like literally-walk away )