If You Find It Hard To Set Boundaries | Dr Julie

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WHO AM I:
I'm a clinical psychologist. I am here to share insights from therapy and psychology research so that you can make use of it in your daily life to understand how your mind works and optimise your own mental health. I cover all things from confidence and motivation to mood and anxiety. I look forward to chatting with you in the comments.

[DrJulie]

Hi I'm Dr. Julie subscribe & follow me for lots more videos on mental health and psychology.
For more on this see my new no.1 bestselling book - Why has nobody told me this before?

[timothymcphail]

She should put herself first by watching her hands while she's cutting that lemon... Safety first

[anapaulacueno]

I'm having anxiety watching you cut that lemon without looking at it 😬😬

[winkyhere]

Those of us raised by a Narcissist were told how *"Selfish!"* we were, whenever we *did* dare make a choice that went against their dictates, or took the spotlight away from them. Our lack of boundaries is due to years of such conditioning. So, it also takes years of hard work in therapy to get beyond such a fractured mindset. But it's *So Worth* the effort!! Healing *IS* possible.

For anyone struggling, *Keep Going.* You'll be GLAD you did, eventually. 💙

[martakomasko]

Ive also noticed its coming sometimes from fear of abandonment

[LarryLurexKh]

Wow, nowadays Mental health awrness is very important. People like Julie really help. :)

[flirkvslife]

The fact that she cut the lemon into four equal slices, representing needs for yourself and others being equal.. beautiful

[Cyanide_Mallika]

Her accuracy scares me I sometimes feel she lives inside my head😂

[yuub]

That first cut😖 it really startled me, I thought you cut your finger instead 😭

[laurisawitch]

This helps me a lot to know that my boundaries should also be seen as equal to other people! Growing up in a narcissistic family scares me that other people will be neglectful of my own needs if I bring them up. Thank you sm

[barboradovhunova]

Thank you, Dr. Julia.

Its not always easy do it.. It's struggle for An empath 🙌❤️

[marlena]

I'm so glad you decided to start this channel. Most of the time I hate psychology content, becuse it doesn't seen helpfull or professional and often just makes me overthink way too much. Your shorts are just perfect- calm, informative and they don't just tell you to change your life 180° in a minute. Thank you for your work

[pianta]

Yep, I remember putting everyone first when i was little but it unfortunately made it so that a lot of my friends weren’t actually my friends and just liked me because I always said yes to everything they asked. At some point i started choosing for myself instead of them, that helped but it also made it that i had basically no friends, i was still nice to others and cared about them, I just stopped saying yes all the time and most of my ‘friends’ didn’t like that. I put a lot of pressure on myself and started acting desperate to get friends, it took me years to realize that that only works against you. For the first time in years i have actual good friends now, that value me for who i am and not what i can offer. To everyone that has trouble with getting friends, try to be yourself and then eventually people like you will find you if you are open to it.

[sauce]

Watching you gently call me out on my issues really makes me want to become better 😅 seriously though, thank you for doing this. Your videos are real eye openers.

[MrsBee-uolc]

You my lady are a true blessing to my life! Thank you for sharing your wonderful wisdom with the world!

[olythecat]

This channel has helped me so much. I couldn’t be more thankful!

[lulululu]

Your needs are equal to those of other people. But you're you, so you're responsible for yourself first and foremost.

[cindyvanderhouven]

I can’t get over that gorgeous background. The second time I watched the message 😂 and indeed it is quite hard to find a healthy balance.

[MyCottonSunset]

I feel so called out. 🤣 I just started going to therapy and I never realized just how tangled I am 😅

[hye-seonkim]

I've only just started doing this, putting me first. Now no one contacts me. 😟 I never stopped caring about them, but they seem to not like that I need distance sometimes so I can care for myself. 🤷