Borderline Personality Disorder vs. Depression - How to Manage Your Emotions

How do you know if you have borderline personality disorder versus being depressed? People with borderline personality disorder can feel depressed but not all low moods are depression. You can have both depression and borderline personality disorder. However, with borderline personality disorder you can have dramatic changes in your emotions that are due to emotional dysregulation. In this video I talk about emotional regulation and give you two techniques to manage your emotions.

Borderline Personality Disorder Video

Mindfulness Video

Recommended self-help books (Includes affiliate links. Any proceeds gains goes to support the channel and do not cost you any additional money)

Calming the Emotional Storm: Using Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills to Manage Your Emotions and Balance Your Life

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook for Anxiety: Breaking Free from Worry, Panic, PTSD, and Other Anxiety Symptoms

Disclaimer: All of the information on this channel is for educational purposes and not intended to be specific/personal medical advice from me to you. Watching the videos or getting answers to comments/question, does not establish a doctor-patient relationship. If you have your own doctor, perhaps these videos can help prepare you for your discussion with your doctor.

[kayp]

Can you make a video about keeping employment and mental health?

[yopueelin]

With: “BPD are afraid of abandonment so she perceived him as being bored with her at home, that he’d rather go to the gym than cuddle” I resonated with thinking one thing and then at that moment when your partner says something it feels in response to your thoughts and you have a reaction based on if it actually was a response to your thoughts/unspoken desire. But the paranoia of abandonment that causes thoughts like: “he’s bored at home with me” I can see more clearly as “negative talk” so they don’t seem as detrimental as the “reacting to false/imagined reaponses.”

[arantzaazuara]

i’ve been very confused about my relationship with my mom for a long time she doesn’t believe in mental illness but she has crazy mood swings and usually they happen in episodes that last months of weeks like she’ll have normal emotions and have control of her anger and be in a good mood for a few months and then for the next few months she will get angry at small and weird things and be annoyed by everyone and then suddenly want to go out and party and be all over expressing her love for us a lot and constantly reminding me how much she loves me here’s an example: i tend to adjust to my moms mood so one day i was bringing her lunch to work and i got her a salad from panera she got very mad at me because i had gotten her a small salad with no meat (not what she wanted) she got very angry and said that if i cared about her i would’ve known what salad to get her stating that she had been starving the whole day and working hard and that she couldn’t believe that this “shit” was what i brought her. Skip to a few months later i brought her lunch again but was running late and mostly packed snack like things she was disappointed but told me it was okay because she could buy some food at her job she did not get angry and on the other hand told me she was glad i brought her lunch. This happens quite a lot where she will get very angry over certain things and months later not give a single thought to them when they happen again and then a few months later get angry over the same things again i just need some input and this is long but please help i apologize for the length and the lack of punctuation

[thefletchlife]

Clinical Psych student here, this is brilliant content clearly explained. Thanks for taking the time to record this.

[JackRabbit]

I just wanted to say thank you.

This is the first psychology channel I've been recommended that doesn't demonzie us folks with borderline, and understands that we're people too.

I've subscribed, and will certainly be following some of the advice laid out here.

Thank you again doctor, I was afraid the whole of the internet hated us after seeing some of the downright venomous opinions held by other psychology channels, but now I realize things are rarely as bad as they seem.

[taylorrich-lane]

Situation: I ask my best friend of 10 years at least once a week if she wants to hang out. We're both "busy" people, meaning we both have full time jobs, we both have different relationships to maintain, and we both are on opposite schedules. We have one day a week that lines up perfectly for me being able to see her. She's my person, my favorite person in the world. So like I said, I ask her once a week to hang out, and it seems like the past few months, every time I ask her to hang out, she's got a reason why she can't. I try my best to really understand that and respect that, but there's one catch. I see her out with her boyfriend all the time. I see her doing things with him and not me, and obviously I have to respect the fact that she's got a relationship that she loves being in, she's happy and I'm happy for her. All I've asked is for a few hours of her time a week, whereas he'll sometime get days or weeks of her time. This last week was really the breaking point for me when I started to piece together that maybe she doesn't want to be my friend anymore. I tell myself that she's replaced me, she's found someone that's gonna keep up with her on different levels and that I'm just no longer needed. If she's not my friend I'll be completely lost. I messaged her tonight, and instead of telling her all of the things I'm thinking and writing her, I told her, "I really miss hanging out with you." I'm just hoping she replies...
I've done DBT therapy before, and it helped for a while, but the person I was going to was only seeing patients under 18 years of age, so I had to stop seeing them when I turned 18. Since then, I haven't found anyone that uses DBT as their method of therapy and I really need it. I appreciate these videos, even if they're short. Thank you.

[Sarablueunicorn]

How to distinguish what your "gut" is telling you from the disorder? Most times in the past that my gut has told nssome people were trying to harm me in some manner I ended up being right.

[lauragadille]

It's so hard to keep my emotions in tact when I'm going through a spell of my depression and anxiety.

[dougflatt]

I’ve been holding my symptoms since I’ve been a child and I’m almost 32 now

[mairzydoats]

I feel like I see alot of people using "BPD" like it's short for Bi-Polar Disorder instead of Borderline Personality Disorder.

[Roxanna.wez]

As always, informative video. Looking for to more videos on managing emotions and DBT 👍

[Nicole-vhnn]

I have bpd and depression and your example of a partner saying he's going to the gym made me laugh because I have responded many times that exact same way ..

Very useful video, thank you

[traymctrayful]

if I am honest, this makes me feel like a bad person. I feel I am the empirical of my suffering, I already know that. But if your realising your behaviour with others (changed it), but your still left with these crazy emotions. how do you learn to live with it? I feel these techniques are more for protecting the other people around us you know? I am aware of how wrong my behaviour is seomtimes, my reactions to situations and how my emotional dysregulation plays a huge part in majority of where I go in my moods. I am better at communicating with others for that and its make me alot aware of why I know Im not normal in a sense of regulating and my thoughts. But how do you learn to live with it? Sorry for my depthful question, but if I am honest this is something I am struggling with in myself at the moment. Trying to look for ways to accept it

[maryammohamed]

I'm grateful I found your channel, your videos are helping me more than my therapist ever did in her 30 min session. thank you so much, please keep doing that, it's a great help. It's straight to the point and based on science not hypothetically motivating.

[saviongilbert]

Thank you Dr. Tracey Marks for such informative information and placing it here on YouTube.

[isafava]

I can't even put in words how much this helps. I'm going to try to practice some of these things. Living with borderline sucks, but when you have some tools, it makes it easier. Thank you very much.

[davidhansen]

Dr marks your magic!!! Don't remember self harming in a decade but had a weak moment today. After counting the 38 burns I'm still left with today from last incident I wasnt sure way outta trap today until you popped in my head and I decided no actions till 1 of your vids on bpd. You helped me calm down and brought my mind from darkness back to baseline. Thank you Dr. I really can't explain how helpful you and a few others have been.

[michellenunyas]

This is so helpful. Sometimes it really feels hopeless but this video gives me so much hope.

[DreamingInTechnicolor]

Great video. I have a friend with BPD who’s battling depression after dealing with the death of her spouse.. I’m trying to be supportive while dealing with my own situation but I’ve learned to tread lightly. These videos have been a great source of information; it helps me to understand another’s perspective/ perception and to tailor mine.

[megss]

You are great! Thank you SO much for your time spent making videos for people like me, someone who is desperate to find answers. You have given me new hope in my struggle with mental health. Thank you!