Two “Ugh” Traits Central To Narcissists

Here are two traits that are central to narcissism that will make you go, "Ugh!"

Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. For 40+ years he maintained a counseling practice in Dallas, conducting more than 65,000 therapy sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Since creating his YouTube channel, his videos have received more than 115 million views.

📣 Dr. Carter's new course, Anger Games, is live! 📣

#selfcentered #selfish #narcissism #narcissist #narcissisticmindgames #anger #angry #relationships #relationship #toxic #toxicrelationships

[hunterluxton]

You explain narcissism with a simple elegance. I've watched you many times and you always have insightful, clear and accurate analysis of such people. Thank you!

[pennycoyote]

...I call it the ick factor:
Interrupting
Judging
Overly negative
Complaining
Gossiping-rumors, speculation
Boasting
Lying
Teasing
Bullying
Offensive statements/jokes

[charlottetubbs]

What about just being mean spirited and a real bully.
I dont see shame and fear.
I see haughty, demons, and scornful.
Entitled snd egotistical

[IzabelaWaniek-ix]

True. The narcisist’s selfishness and inability to regulate emotions make it impossible to sustain any kind of relationship. It’s pathetic to watch - grown up adults who behave like dysregulated toddlers screaming- me, me, me only me!! Nobody else matters! Unbelievable but true.

[brooklynnchick]

Your ministry on YouTube is one of the things that has helped me get healthy after being raised by a covert narcissist. I found your channel and for the first time felt like someone saw me and understood what I had gone through for 35 years. I am so grateful to you. You made the difference in my life. ❤

[yukio_saito]

Yes. These 2 traits are common to overt and covert narcissists.

[simonwadsworth]

I agree. Its best to stay away from narcs.

[gigidayz]

They absolutely double down on the contempt and nastiness as soon as their shame and insecurity starts to show. I have seen this so SO many times in the narcs in my life.

[craigmerkey]

being a victim and brilliant all in the same phrase! Maddening!!!!

[amandainsa]

First description describes my former boss. Second description describes my former immediate supervisor. The Toxic Twins. I resigned 3 years ago. Best decision I've ever made! Since then, my replacements have each resigned after less than a year. Now they've hired #4. Just one day of dealing with people like that seems like an eternity!!

[WisconsinWanderer]

They have no compassion or soul at all

[lynnebucher]

Had a boyfriend literally tell me that it was his way or the highway. I moved out abruptly shortly thereafter. He tracked me down and asked me why I dumped him, and I said well you said "my way or the highway", so I chose the highway. I needed a partner, not a master.

[kellyallison]

They are creating a new reality, for everybody.

[TonyaA]

Im learning to call them out on their crap.. Only thing when I do this they try to shift blame and refuse to take accountability ever..
They make you feel like its aleays you and they play victims, when your the real victim of their evilness.

[bridgettetraveler]

They're so 2 faced!! They cause physical pain by their stressing us, if we let them!!!

[bernardwalden]

Thank you Dr Carter I like ugh as to WTF. I don't have my words back as yet though I'm getting there. Gaslighting makes me go ugh.
Thank you, Dr Carter. ❤

[BaraSchmidt]

While it may be important (to the Narcissistic individual) that their "must" list is to be rigidly observed by anyone they seek supply from, let me give you a higher priority "must" list - WE MUST be Authentic. WE MUST use discernment. WE MUST have and use Empathy. WE MUST not allow ourselves to be further subjugated by the "musts" of these hollow humans. Learn Healthy, Get Healthy and Stay Healthy!!

[terrydyer]

My husband and I were mentally and verbally abused by our evil narcissistic demon of an adult daughter, for years. It got so bad that the stress cause an emotional breakdown for my husband, One day he started crying uncontrollably with him gasping for air ( this is a guy that never cried because of his upbringing of men don't cry ) He was asking what he did wrong on raising her to be so evil then he collapsed and took his last breath 4 years and 7 months ago. She always had anger issues since she was a teen but we chopped it up as just being a teen and hormons since she seemed to be a very well rounded person overall. We noticed the changes in her as she got older and thought she was bipolar. But it was too late for us to get her help because she was over 18. She wouldn't amit that she has mental problems and get help. By the time I learned about narcissism, it was too late. The trauma damage was already done. In those horrible years of walking on eggshells she had us under her control because she was kicked out of her ex husband's home for stepping out on him and the trauma she caused. She ended back with us because she was homeless and 3 months pregnant with another's man child. So of course we took her in. She was lying from the start, telling us her marriage failed because he was abusing her physically. I know different now. We tried to help her, going through her pregnancy and the birth, then she couldn't handle being a mother. She wouldn't do what a mother should do and we ended up raising our grandson until he was 6 years old, She hunted down for a new supply because my husband became disabled and we couldn't give her a free ride anymore. She had to start paying her own way. That pissed her off and it really got bad. We ended up homeless with her stalking us and still messing with our heads. Then my husband died. She destroyed me beyond repair. I have been abandoned by everyone, ... She made sure of that.. I went no contact but it is slowly killing me from the inside out. I can't have a relationship with my grandson. I can't function anymore. I'm the one that is at fault somehow. And you know what.. I'm starting to believe I must be. I'm just a failure and a lost cause.. I'm so tired of trying. I quit...

[jmoller]

Dysregulation I've learned elsewhere is caused by being shamed for having normal emotional responses

[GrantOakes]

The term "qualities" implies something good. There's NOTHING good about a Narcissist! When I see those "characteristics or flaws", I RUN!