4 Habits of Joy-Filled Marriage Book Review: How to Improve Your Marriage in 15 Minutes a Day

Keeping your marriage happy can be hard. And while many people want to learn communication skills to improve their marriage, that can only go so far. The real skills that make marriage better are skills that help you have more joy more often. In their book, The 4 Habits of Joy-Filled Marriages: How 15 Minutes a Day Will Help You Stay in Love, the authors Chris Coursey and Marcus Warner teach essential skills and habits to have a better relationship, more joy, and more love in your marriage.

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Therapy in a Nutshell, LLC, and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.

About Me:
I’m Emma McAdam. I’m a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I have worked in various settings of change and growth since 2004. My experience includes juvenile corrections, adventure therapy programs, wilderness therapy programs, an eating disorder treatment center, a residential treatment center, and I currently work in an outpatient therapy clinic.

In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life's direction.

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[jamaicaism]

1.play together
2.listen for emotions
3.appreciate each other.
4. Nurture a rythm

[deela]

Finally what I've been waiting for confirmation. This is what I experienced in my childhood EVEN THOUGH we had severe economic hardships and every one had plenty of imperfections!!!
Once in a while when gloomiest, boredom or tensions were building up when we kids were frustrated at various brickwalls my father would simply get us to do run and catch around the dining table, he too joining in, though he was in his late 40s. Or its a simple word game challenge or " middle pig". Just 15 minutes lifted up the spirits. Everyone immediately became joyful. It was always possible to " unburden" as soon as we return home. There was play time, work time, family time, and alone time. Individuality was not squashed up for the sake of the group, but was nurtured, to be of help for the group when needed. No one was lazy & indulgent, nor was dominant & bossy. Hard work and empathy was the normal.

Then came MASS MEDIA... altering perceptions and creating confusion... poor next gen kids . There is over emphasis on material possessions.

Your recommendations don't cost a cent.

[chinookvalley]

I was lucky. I watched my parents live as this book suggests. They held hands and kissed. They danced around the house with each other. They did something new - every single day. They never went to bed angry with each other (Mom said it will still be there tomorrow, but for now, they will rest). They joked and played cards or board games with each other. They were married 65 years. I am so happy they had each other, 'til the very end. For me? I never married and I happily live a single life. My brother is married to a witch and it's his 4th marriage.

[vamonarch]

Thanks. I love your channel. I’ve been married for 27 years. At every stage, you get out what you put in. Thanks for this good information.

[healingfear]

Lol I love the bloopers. I used intentional appreciation to fall in love with the new town I moved to - it was a whole different ecosystem than I was used to. I had moved from the west coast rainforest to high desert. To make it harder, I went through a difficult breakup right after the move (loved him so much). My purposeful intent to find things to appreciate about my new home really helped.

[Lr_youtube]

Joy marriage:
- transactional relationship
- relationship brain
1. Play
2. Considere of feelings and emotions
3. Daily appreciation
4. Rhythm = routine to keep it loving and happy

[ZiggyWhiskerz]

Just got married 7/18/20! I'm glad I already follow you so I can see this!

[writerrhino]

I loved the outtakes at the end. You seem so polished and at ease in your presentation, I'm glad to see you have "outtakes" in your day just like the rest of us.

[stevenleonard]

So Very Timely! Thank you. We, as a couple have heightened stress and major interruptions to our schedules (adult children have had to relocate to our place for work-at-home) and I have found myself majoring in Problem Solving mode vs Relational. This not only alerted me but gave me tools and a reference to go to for more. And here I was just exploring your content to address Anxiety (Problem-solving). Thank you.

[tinaperez]

This very much reminds me of the story / cognitive example of "which of the two fighting wolves (one fear and hate, one optimism and positive) in our head will win? The one we feed / focus on".

[candole]

In a time when it’s very easy to focus on the challenges, this is advice that a lot of couples need. Great bloopers as a bonus end.

[drklnel]

First time I can remember taking notes while watching a YouTube video. Thanks so much for sharing these tips.

[priyakulkarni]

You are just amazing ! God bless you. You make difference in people’s lives dear!

[affergot]

I definitely did buy the book after watching this review first and I have to say, the book was absolutely phenomenal! There are so many different ideas packed into this short read and it really feels like I'm getting an education about what good steps in a relationship look like! I grew up with divorced parents and I never really got to see what a marriage is supposed to look like until now, I am happy that I finally know what a healthy relationship is supposed to look and feel like <3

Thank you bunches for the review, I watched it a second time and noticed that everything was really well covered, and more importantly, showed me a very neat book

[hanane_hmd_]

waw i'm so happy i found your channel, your voice is so soothing and relaxing and the informations you give are amazing never heard before. Thank you so much for this video.

[tsjitskekok-zondervan]

Buying the book ! Thank you for your videos. They are so helpful ! You are doing a great job !

[ontheway]

Thank you so much for this book review! Ordering it right away.

[TrialTappersMentalHealthTips]

What you focus on expands. I will buy the book to focus on the habits. Connecting more then correcting will always improve the relationship. I “appreciate” all your book reviews.

[sterlingsilver]

Thank you Emma for the work you put into this channel! I have benefited from your videos.

[patricialong]

Valuable information. Thank you. And the outtakes at the end made me chuckle 😁