Psychology of Judging People and How to Cultivate a Kind Mind

Why do we like to judge people? Why is it unwise to let our minds develop judgmental habits? How can we develop new habits of mind that are not so judgmental? These are some questions we explore in this video.

Keywords: attribution theory, internal attribution, external attribution, type 1 thinking, type 2 thinking, kind mind

Produced by
Nick Fortino & Robert Daluz

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[psychologyis]

Now there are layers to this because you can make an internal attribution, like saying a man abused someone because he is abusive, but make an external attribution about how he became abusive. So he abused because he’s abusive but he’s abusive because he was abused.

And it’s an interesting note here that if you embrace the philosophical position of determinism—that there is no true volition—and you’re going to be consistent with it, you are committed to making external attributions for literally all human behavior. Determinists believe there is no internal locus of control and thus leaves no room for judging a person.

[HopefulTribe]

So true! I have noticed that the more we accept ourselves, the less we judge others...

[hemantsharmachannel]

You are superior to no one, you are infirior to no one ...

[casinogamer]

We spend too much time worrying about other people and why they look the way they look or dress the way they dress or why they don't talk very much why they are the way they are etc. etc. STOP IT! It is okay if we're not all the same. We aren't supposed to be. Focus on other things going on in the world and things that we can change. If someone doesn't talk to you or say hi or smile so what. Let them go their own way. And continue on with your own life. Maybe that person has things going on in their lives that don't have anything to do with you or me. Maybe they just don't know how to socialize but they really want to. And if they don't want to that is okay it is their choice as long as it has no effect on you then why should you care anyway. Hatred doesn't help anything and it only makes us look bad. And when we judge others in a lot of cases we are only hurting ourselves because in some cases that person could have been a really good friend or someone who could have helped us in some way. It is about acceptance. We sometimes expect everything to be perfect in an imperfect world and it doesn't work that way it never has and it never will there will always be differences remember that there is a balance to everything in life and you can't have one thing without the complete opposite where there are extroverts there will be introverts where there is hot there is cold where there is black there will be white where there is light there will be darkness and so on and so forth. Live and let live.

[DonnaM.Turner]

True ❤Judging others has no power in the long run who is anyone to judge another human ! We’re all one body !

[Octavio]

I can't express how free i feel after this video. Just one video to realise how poisoning is one habit.
❤

[jeromecabral]

I never judge a person negatively I always judge others with positive thoughts

[bestrongandloveyourself]

This is amazing video! I am trying to be less judgmental and at the same time not to get upset by the judgements of other people and this information was very helpful! Thank you so much! 🙏💖💖💖

[francisbertolini]

We must judge actions but not other's motives.

[hemantsharmachannel]

You ase so calm ... listening to you take us to another zone ...

[ChrisBird]

Thanks, I needed this .. I was SOO judgmental and bitter . Meditation brought this to my attention ..

[PowerOfOne-uh]

Very good points made here that I havent really thought about before. Thanks for sharing. :)

[mohammadghaffari]

I truly like the video. You emphasized the difference between judgement and assessment in an understandable simple way

[brightphoebesays]

I have observed a person over the course of my entire life and particularly her treatment of me over the last 10 years, since my divorce. I know that growing up she was more interested in being Superior to others and always being the coolest and having the coolest and the best and winning. The last time I went for coffee with her, 8 years ago, I determined that I didn't actually like her that much, because she is status oriented and materialistic, and didn't really want to be friends with her, even though she's almost like a relative. Then last Christmas she did not wish me happy holidays, nor send me a card, and then at my birthday in April she neglected me all together as well. She usually sends me a belated birthday wish by email. That didn't even come this year. She always says how busy she is, and how important everything else is in her life. I ascertained over the last eight years of her not having enough time for me, even once telling me she did not have time for my drama, that she's a snob, and that she thinks she is superior to me and that she does not value having a relationship with me. So I told her I didn't want to stay in touch anymore. I don't regret cutting her loose, but then I lost my aunt as well, her mother, who I did nothing to, but considers my slight of her daughter to be a slight of herself. My aunt insists that I apologize to her her saying she was a snob. She says I don't know her and I can't say that. But from my point of view she comes across as exactly that. My aunt says i a mean cruel and spiteful and is disgusted by me now. She says her daughter got to where she is through hard work, and that my lower station in life is my own fault. I do not think those things of myself. I was setting a boundary about how people are allowed to treat me, because I do have self-respect. My aunt lives a life of privilege. She has wealth yet never worked a day in her life. So how can she say? How can she say I haven't tried hard enough and that's why my marriage failed and that's why I don't have a career. It's not that simple. I started out at a disadvantage, and it's no longer appropriate for her daughter and I to pretend we are real sisters. She will always be more successful than I, and I will always be more sensitive and empathetic than she.

[nikhilpranav]

External attributions could lead to external attributions, abusive, dug-abusing households, lead to abusive, drug-abusive people. But I grew up thinking that society is built on one thing. Respect. I still think that way, and even though it happen very quickly, if I judge someone, I do that to think what may be disrespectful, and attempt to avoid it. Great video, by the way, I enjoyed the presentation of these well researched assessments.

[natebullock]

Really important, high quality content. Thank you

[lexynoelle]

4:38-4:51 was so powerful wow. Thank you for the insight ❤️

[kareendeveraux]

That's why I pity most psychiatrists and psychologists. Imagine living with the judgmental DSM in your mind...
Thank you for this awesome video. ❤️

[LeroyHudson-os]

The main problem that I have with people is that they've judged me before getting to know me. Even in church. That's why I don't go to church anymore.

[budte]

I have an acquaintance whe kept a dozen ducks in her garden. Because of foxes (UK) she only let them out under her supervision. One day she needed to go quickly to the shops and decided to take a chance leaving the ducks unsupervised. When she returned 20 minutes later all 12 ducks were dead with their heads eaten. There is no point expecting foxes to be anything other than foxes. It is all they know and are capable of. There is a difference in assessing something without judging that it ought to have been different. So supervise and take care of your ducks, , do what you need to do, but don't blame the fox for being a fox - it is not the fox that feels that judgement..