How to Care for an Elderly Parent You Don't Like

Caregivers do many things that they don't like out of a sense of duty and responsibility. In this video, caregiving expert Pamela D Wilson shares tips for how to care for elderly parents you don't like and make the best of a difficult situation.

Tips, resources, podcasts, a library of articles, online courses, a blog, and more are on Pamela's website

[jilligain]

I’ve been having to do this for my aging mother for afew yrs now. And it’s been quite a ride. But, in a nutshell, it’s led me to do some serious soul searching & seeking spirituality. So I suppose I’m grateful. But on the other hand, it’s dredged up some very buried childhood traumas from both her & my dad. So it’s a double edge sword really

[myriaddreams]

The first time i was honest with my mum about the strain of having her living with me, and how overwhelmed and stressed i was, she turned and walked away and didnt speak to me for days.

After 6 months of living with me, she hasn't authorised me as a representative for her aged care plan, so I can't even book services for her. Shes a stubborn, mean and miserable person and it's all making me feel insane.

[auradiana]

This wasn't helpful to trauma abuse survivors... basically, looking for trauma informed and integrating help.

[nanolight]

FTD Frontal Temporal Dementia changes behaviors and has changed my mom into someone I do not like and she does not like me. Thankfully I can get in home health care to do the bath and wound care. I say as little as possible to her and it prevents her fighting with me.

[trmzsob]

No no noooo. You actually don’t have to do any of it (even if you’re in a state that requires you to care for them, there are ways out of that). Remember you are a free person with choices. Do it because you want to or because you said you would - or don’t do it - it’s your choice. There’s only so much time to raise your own family. Don’t wreck your own life and care less for your own family out of guilt about a parent. If your elderly parent is a jerk and they didn’t set themselves up for old age, why on earth should you throw your own life into chaos? Guilt and fear is no reason to do anything.

[tamikagamble]

Don't take care of your family member....it will ruin your life.