When Your Girl Stops Putting In Effort

It sucks when your relationship is flourishing, you're super happy, & then you notice that your girl has has stopped putting in the effort & investing. You're noticing that you're now a low priority, she's rarely available, the physical intimacy has been throttled & seemingly everything has come to a screeching halt. Naturally, men try to pick up the slack to get the relationship back to where it was, but they often find themselves trying harder & harder, & getting nothing in return. Your girl has become complacent.

In this Coaching Video a viewer writes in to me after his girlfriend has stopped putting in effort into the relationship. In response, he's been giving her space, but that's not changing her behavior, & he's still finding himself a low priority in his girlfriend's life. I give him some guidance on how to handle his complacent girlfriend's lack of effort in the relationship & start getting his needs met.
#MensDatingTips #RelationshipInvestment #PutYourFootDown #MensRelationshipAdvice
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I'm Erik Peterson, a men's relationship & dating coach, and at Skill of Attraction I provide dating tips & relationship advice, mainly for men, to help facilitate growing & maintaining attraction in their romantic relationships to where it's fun, loving & relatively effortless.

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[ddmozz]

I watch this video a couple of times per year. So many hard truths

[eddiewinslow]

I'm feeling weird, I don't know if this is me being insecure or what. I was in a relationship before the girl I'm with now and was cheated on, she was a horrible person. My new girlfriend is nothing like my ex but something happened recently and I may just be overly insecure from past experience. My girlfriend has never dressed up for work before, always dressed casual, very casual but just this week after we spent a nice weekend together she drove back home (she lives almost 2 hours away) and she has been off work for a couple weeks and was going back the next day, the very first thing she did as soon as she got home was go out shopping for new clothes for work, which is fine obviously, but it seemed to be very important for her to do this asap before she went back to work, the next day she sends me a picture of her at work, all dressed up, a skirt (something she never wears) a dressy shirt, more makeup than usual, hair done up in a new way, not wearing a necklace I bought her that she told me she wears all the time, new dressy sandals. The whole year shes worked at this place she's always worn casual outfits, so it seemed really odd and out of place for her to all of a sudden dress sexy at work, she told me a coworker commented on her outfit and said oh I didn't even know you had legs and she said, I never dress like this but I think I'm going to keep doing it I like it, I asked her what made her decide to get all dressed up 3 different times, not sounding insecure about it and she ignored it each time. I'm wondering if she's trying to attract another man's attention at work, if shes cheating or I'm just being stupid and insecure, maybe I've shown her too much desire, I've made her feel like I'm extremely attracted to her, maybe she feels it's boring now that she doesn't need to put in any effort and she's finding it more fun to attract other men. I don't know, but when she showed me she was dressed up all sexy just for work which she has never done, it worried me.

[sebarioxes]

Great video as always! I kind of have a problem with my girlfriend, before quarantine we were great, weve been together for about 6 months, after quarantine started I haven’t seen her and she has a gotten a lot more distant over the past couple weeks, she initially told me she was very stressed with school (were both 16 btw) and housework and her strict parents aren’t helpfull so i gave her space in hope that things will get better but they haven’t we rarely talk now and when we do is almost always text and i feel like shes really taking me for granted i do basically all the work in the relationship and i want her to start putting more effort. Now i know this is all basic problem stuff but the thing is that ive asked her how she feels towards me and she says she’s completely good and nothing is bothering her. I want to stop putting most effort to see if she initiates contact but i feel like its just gonna make things worse. I really don’t want to lose her and still love her but feeling down all the time because of this really hurts. What do you think i should do coach?

[jluis]

The first real nail in your coffin is called marriage (minus the honeymoon). Up until then its peanuts.

[kristinabrickey]

Maybe she has been trying to tell you the problem and you won’t listen so she isn’t happy and is forced to move on

[aldenmorris]

she never invites me out with her friends