The 6 Love Styles and How to Understand Yours

Have you ever wondered about the different ways we express and perceive love? Or what the secret is to a long and happy romantic relationship?

In this video, we'd like to talk about a little theory known as the “Color Wheel Theory of Love.” Also sometimes known as Lee’s (1977) love styles or love attitudes, this theory proposes that people love in different ways, which can be categorized into six broad styles of love.

These love styles not only characterize our relationship with others but also how we feel and act towards our romantic partners. Here are the six different love styles and how you can better understand yours.

Writer: Chloe Avenasa
Script Editor: Vanessa Tao
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
Animator: Zuzia
YouTube Manager: Cindy Cheong

References:
Lee, J. A. (1977). A typology of styles of loving. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 3(2), 173-182.
Davis, K. E., & Latty-Mann, H. (1987). Love styles and relationship quality: A contribution to validation. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 4(4), 409-428.
Fricker, J., & Moore, S. (2002). Relationship satisfaction: The role of love styles and attachment styles. Current Research in Social Psychology, 7(11), 182-204.
Levy, M. B., & Davis, K. E. (1988). Love Styles and attachment styles compared: Their relations to each other and to various relationship characteristics. Journal of social and Personal Relationships, 5(4), 439-471.
Mallandain, I., & Davies, M. F. (1994). The colours of love: Personality correlates of love styles. Personality

[amethysttvgl]

I'm platonic love for sure! It took me over 3 years of friendship/"dating" (we were in middle/high school so it wasnt really dating as much as it was closer friends with a new title XD) before I even felt comfortable with my partner touching me (just casual autism things lol)! However after those 3 years of growing close as friends, I finally felt comfortable enough to get serious and really open up! 5 years later and I'm so glad I really took my time getting to know such a wonderful man. He was and always will be my best friend! Even in a few years when he's my husband, I'll always love him for being the best friend, partner, and family I could ever ask for!

[lycorines]

Remember guys, love is different for everyone.

[Dev.Yadav.]

"The magic of our first love is our ignorance that it can never end." :, )

[mariats]

fun fact, 5/6 of these words are actually Greek!
Eros = Έρωτας
Mania = Μανία
Pragma = Πράγμα
Storge = Στοργή
Agape = Αγάπη

[Wind_Cursed]

I'm a mix of Pragma (Practical love), Storge (Platonic love), and Agape (Selfless love). However, I'm mainly in the Storge category and pretty much always have been. Everything in this video that was said about Storge fits my love style perfectly. I do have a little bit of other love styles mixed in, too. I'm just mainly in the Storge category right now

[SoCalRegisteredNurse]

I’ve been Agape in several relationships. My daughter is this way, too. In my experience the other person gets conditioned to it and learns to expect it, not reciprocate as much, and take it for granted, unfortunately. So now I’m Storge

[smittywerganyangermanjense]

I gotta say I try to fight it, but I sometimes feel the mania in my love style because I do get jealous and lonely and sometimes I have been too codependent in past relationships. I've found it's easier for me to be single and seek more of a platonic bond with someone that develops naturally rather than trying to go looking for romantic relationships. Platonic stuff feels so much better because then I'm less uncertain about a person which makes me more comfortable and confident in our relationship.

[sober]

Love yourself, be you. Take care of yourself and put yourself first. That's the most beautiful love.

[thebiggestmaraudersfan]

0:46 Eros | Passionate Love
1:24 Mania | Obsessive Love
2:00 Ludus | Game-Playing Love
2:33 Pragma | Practical Love
3:11 Storge | Platonic Love
4:06 Agape | Selfless Love ❤️

[unknowndestinyplayer]

I find myself a mixture of pretty much all these love styles but I most relate to Agape because me and my significant other are both making sure the other is comfortable or okay. I tend to over look my own feelings and focus more on my partner's but they also understand that and try to make me feel better in turn. We also decided to get to know eachother first before starting anything serious so we were friends before hand.

[meowisnow]

learning about these different types of love would have really helped me when i was struggling with my sexual orientation. it makes so much sense that my love style is platonic because i’ve recently come to the conclusion that i’m aroace since i’ve never experienced any kind of romantic or sexual attraction to others

[itsgirlcraft]

...this showed up in my feed after I commented on someone's post about being demotivated and feeling guilty for not posting. Where I made myself cry with how emotional said comment was getting.
This feels very relevant.

[ZancoIntel]

My crush cares deeply about me. I was on the verge of having a panic attack for like a week, and I couldn't hold out anymore. I just text her "Help" and she calls me as soon as she saw my text. We hung out for about 3 hours the next day, and cuddled for a bit. She tells me I'm one of the most important people in her life. Yet I still think I'm in the friend zone.

I'm definitely a Storge love kind of guy.

[NathalieLazo]

“Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough” ― Oprah Winfrey ✨
Being grateful is a TOTAL GAME CHANGER! ❤️

[DrinkYourNailPolish]

Agape love is talked abt frequently in my religion. How followers should be selfless and kind to one another even with ppl who hurt us we are expected to turn the other cheek. It's hard sometimes and not always do we live up to expectations but it's wonderful having agape love as our standard.

[Nuwa_Eri]

When I was younger, I definitely had Manic Love Style.
Now I'm Storge and Agape depending on who it is.
Amazing how we grow.

[mintiebunnyemmakora]

❤ _Timestamps_ ❤

0:46 - Eros - Passionate Love
1:24 - Mania - Obsessive Love
2:00 - Ludus - Game-Playing Love
2:34 - Pragma - Practical Love
3:10 - Storge - Platonic Love
4:05 - Agape - Selfless Love

[tokuroko]

As someone who's balancing on Pragma, Storge and Agabe but is like zero Eros, i find it difficult to be with someone because most of the time they all have Eros love style, im uncapable of it. Like showing my love is such a private intimate process for me, that either i distance myself from them when they want to show that much affection or i start "cringing". And than they mistake it as me disliking them or finding it creepy. But it's not that, I show my love through cooking you hearty meals, taking care of you and your stuff and as a payback a simple thank you or listening to me how my day was, is plenty enough. However by far no one really understood that, because media's potrayal of love is really only shown in eros style, and once you have different lovestyle, especially being young and being girl, they find it weird.

[zadiczane]

I like to think that the person making these is actually every one of these at the same time.

[eitanshapiro]

I learned something new today! definitely have a mix of Mania and Pragma. Basically I won't become obsessed with someone unless I think the relationship is practical.... It's a strange combination and I've found many girls can find it off putting at times. I've definitely been trying to change more to Pragma over Mania, but I also have OCD so that can be very difficult at times.