The Harsh Reality of Problem Solving: What to Do When Nothing Works

Join us for an honest discussion about handling situations when solutions fail to yield the expected results. In this video, we confront the challenging reality of problem-solving and navigating scenarios when solutions don't go as planned.

Encountering obstacles or setbacks in problem-solving is an inevitable part of life. We'll delve into the complexities of this reality, exploring the emotions and frustrations that arise when our solutions fall short of resolving the issue at hand.

Dr. K’s Guide to Mental Health explores Anxiety, Depression, ADHD, and Meditation

▼ Timestamps ▼
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00:00 - Introduction
01:57 - How do I know what's gonna work?
03:13 - Where the theory comes from
07:39 - Positive Deviance
10:41 - How does this work practically?
15:16 - Conclusion

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DISCLAIMER

Healthy Gamer is an online community and resource platform for gamers and their families. It does not provide medical services or professional counseling, and it is not a substitute for professional medical care. Our coaches are peer supporters, not professionally trained experts, and they cannot provide medical service. If you or a loved one are experiencing an emergency, please call your nation's emergency telephone number.

All guests of Healthy Gamer are informed of the public, non-medical nature of the content and have expressly agreed to share their story.

#healthygamergg #problemsolving #lifeadvice

[MELLMAO]

Whoa this is truly a game changer. I suffer from chronic pain daily and it can get very easy to blame yourself and wonder what you did wrong when you get a flare-up, and you go into a vicious cycle of guilt and over-analyzing. What does help a lot more is seeing what am I doing when I have LOWER pain-days or when pain gets more manageable sooner. Ofc, you can't do much when your pain is dependant of barometric pressures, weather changes and menstrual cycles, but you can look at other things that you have control over when you are feeling better. For me it's sleep, light exercising, resting enough/ taking frequent breaks and socializing

[tayzonday]

This is a helpful perspective. Thanks so much 🙏

[ThemBEanss]

I’m amazed at how many angles Dr. K uses to understand the feeling of “stuckness.”

[ShenobiYT]

Applied "Positive Deviance" during my weight loss last year, losing 33 pounds in a span of 6 months was excruciating but worth it. I'd rather experience pain from discipline than pain from regret.

[elietheprof]

The famine story shows just how deadly social norms can be. The fact that people will avoid "peasant food" to the point of malnourishment

[KingofWorms]

This video literally just slapped me in the face with a new perspective. Thank you so much for this!

[JLchevz]

I did this (unknowingly) to fix my IBS. I focused on that I COULD eat and what didn't made me bloated and miserable and only ate that and added little by little other foods until I had a complete diet and it worked. (Took me months of trial and error though but I slowly saw improvements and now I can eat everything).

[randxalthor]

Thank you for bringing attention to this! Even before the video ended, I had already begun to think of times when I succeeded and what was different about those times. It's alleviating my sense of helplessness and hopelessness.

[jonesaffrou]

as usual makes me wanna file a restraining order on dr K just because of how relevant it is. literally two days ago I took a routine test in uni that I've been failing since day 1 and all but aced it. the fact did capture my attention but I didn't go beyond basic "I guess if you actually study you get good", but now I'm more interested in dissecting what makes the way I study for the subject so effective and applying it to other subjects where I'm barely passing.

Also doesn't help that barely passing is the norm for this major because it's actually pretty challenging, especially since it's packed with ""gifted"" kids (including me). But there are people who are so good I don't know if I want to worship them or slice their tires, and I wouldn't say they're more intelligent than me or my classmates or something, so it's absolutely possible if you get the techniques tailored for you.

[JLchevz]

This is good. Sometimes focusing on the problems only makes us overwhelmed instead of focused on actually looking at what we did right.

[lilijagaming]

The scary part is that I have already done similar thinking process and there is one big factor: I perform the best if I am not going to work and in general I am not forced to go out. At this point I kind don't know what to do next.

[toomanysymbols]

I think my main problem currently is the lack of a fundamental motivator that makes me want to replicate past successes. I'm really prone to nihilism, and I just can't seem to find a way to not constantly return to that state of mind. It's not that I don't know how to solve my problems, it's that I don't have a stable and consistent answer to the question of why I should solve them in the first place. It just comes down to finding the basic and inherent value within my life, but I feel like I have to lie to myself to make me believe there is any.

I also know though, that by simply getting out there and engaging with the world with my full attention, that I don't have time to realize that what I'm doing has no purpose. That could work, except for the fact that in the long term I believe it will lead to never being able to be alone with my own mind, which I suppose is a very common problem in the modern world, though people probably each have their own thing that causes it.

For me it's the nihilism that inevitably creeps in after a while. I know I could fill these moments with meditation, spiritual practice etc to keep that stuff at bay, so that's probably where I should start. Now for the initial motivation to build up the habit of doing these things, I suppose that will just have to be the desire to be free of suffering. Alright, let's get to it then, hopefully.

[pc]

Y'know, I know people come up with superlatives all the time but your channel has genuinely helped me, especially on the adhd side of things. You really seem to have sought to understand things at a deeper level and tried them out on yourself instead of parroting received wisdom. This is worthwhile material 👍

[vietnamese_man]

Super helpful--I've heard time and time again about the concept of deliberate practice and 'learning from our mistakes', but we never really emphasize the theme of 'duplicating our successes'. Really insightful talk, this is something I did sometimes unknowingly but I never knew it had its own formal concept.

[nikilexaa]

I don't comment on YouTube videos often, but Dr. K if you're reading this... I don't think I can accurately describe how much your videos have helped me. Keep doing what you're doing, because the world needs more people like you. I'm sure you probably read tons of similar comments, so this one will most likely be forgotten by you in the next 15 minutes, but I bet a lot of people will forever benefit from your advice. And I imagine it feels fucking amazing when you think about it. I guess that's the best compliment one can ever get - the realization you impacted someone's life at some point, where if they wouldn't have stumbled upon you, they could be in much worse state now.

[Chii_]

I've been falling deep in a slump and rotating negative thoughts recently and I needed this video so much. Thank you!

[canaldogrifonoia]

This video blew my mind when I realized that I have been keeping a journal about my days since 2018! What a resource! For the past three weeks, I have been reading my journal from 2023 and selecting both positive and negative aspects about my personality. My initial intention was to see where I stand compared to the big five traits, but now I am definitely using it for positive deviance purposes. Thank you, doc!

[PatChatGC]

My mind is blown. This sounds so simple and obvious now that I hear it, but I never would've thought about looking at it this way. I'm so glad that you make videos!!

[horchatatee]

Dr. K NEVER fails with presenting a different route or take that blows my mind with how in front of me but unaware of it I was. Much love <3

[alexanderprivate]

Another great example is from WW2: one person said to reinforce the returning airplanes on the places were they did not get hit, instead of the places were they where. The logic behind it. The planes that did not return probably got hit on the spots were the returning planes did not. It increased the amount of returning planes significantly.