The Key Differences Between Introverts and Autistic People

Hi! I'm Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic. On this video I explore some of the key differences between an #introvert and an #autistic person. Plus, I share my personal lived experiences as an #actuallyautistic person. #orionkelly #autism #asd #autismsigns #whatautismfeelslike

⏱ Index:
00:00 - Welcome
00:51 - What is an Introvert
02:50 - Social interactions
07:34 - Self awareness
08:57 - Routine
10:10 - Sensory overload

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ABOUT ORION:
Orion Kelly is an #ActuallyAutistic vlogger (YouTuber), podcaster, radio host, actor, keynote speaker and Autistic advocate based in Australia. Orion is all about helping you increase your understanding, acceptance and appreciation of Autistic people.

#AutisticVoices #ActuallyAutistic #Autistic #Autism #OrionKelly #ThatAutisticGuy #ASD

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[SylviusTheMad]

My social anxiety is learned. I didn't used to be anxious around people. It was only when I realized the extent to which I didn't understand people that I became anxious about dealing with them.

[NathanEnos]

"They get the game, they just don't like playing it." Wow. I literally stopped the video, clapped my hands and said "YES!" That is the most clear, concise way of explaining introversion I've ever heard.
Thank you for the video!

[katherinehealy]

I’m definitely an introvert but I’ve also always felt I was mistakenly dropped off on the wrong planet when I was born. Interacting with others is usually confusing and exhausting. I’m 71 now, so I’ve gotten better at it over the years through trial and error. I don’t have a diagnosis and probably won’t seek one at this point, but videos such as this offer a wealth of information about many traits that I identify with.

[brightmoon]

I'm a very introverted person and have been asked many times over the years if I'm autistic. It made me angry for a long time. Then I started answering, "No, I just don't like people." That always shuts them up. 😉

America is a nation of extroverts. My introversion has caused me many problems over the years because people just don't understand. I can't imagine how hard it must be for autistic people. It's a sad commentary on society. 😕

I just want to thank you Orion. I started watching your channel because I have a new stepgrandson, seven years old, that's autistic, and I very much do want to understand.

[urseliusurgel]

I am both an introvert and a diagnosed autist. One of the problems that some intelligent autistic adults can face in getting a diagnosis, or recognising their own autism, is that they have intellectually created 'work-arounds' that outwardly negate some of their autistic traits. For example, I am very good at eye-contact, but I do it consciously. Over many years, I have worked out what duration of eye contact other people find comfortable. Long before I realised that I was autistic, I noticed that I seemed to be missing out on something in interactions with other people, particularly the opposite sex. After conversations, friends would remark about how a woman obviously liked me, and I would be at a complete loss about how that was evident. Being fairly bright, I then actively researched facial expressions and body language, and became reasonably adept at decoding non-verbal signals. Intelligence, or low animal cunning, take your pick, can negate some of the more obvious and stereotypical traits of autism in some people, but the people concerned are still autistic. I have problems with anxiety, changes in routine, some really unpleasant sensory issues and was selectively mute as a child, none of which would be evident if you met me.

[nightfox]

As both, I want to point out a key misunderstanding that a lot of people have about introverts and that is that we aren't necessarily drained by all social interactions. We don't just avoid social interaction entirely. We are drained by social interactions with large groups of people and with people we don't know well but, contrary to common belief, we are often recharged by interaction with small groups of people we are very close with. Autistic people may often by introverted, but autism goes beyond just social interactions, where introversion is by definition related specifically to social interactions. The only reason I think the two are conflated is because they are often evaluated from a social context.

[gardnert]

I'm an autistic extrovert. It was really hard growing up because I would constantly be putting myself out there and failing miserably, usually making myself a big target. But I was also very interested in getting better at social interaction (despite not knowing why I sucked at it until recently), so I just kept going for it and trying to figure out how to be better. Now I feel very comfortable in most social settings and in putting myself out there, as long as I understand the social situation I'm in.

[jc]

I'm an empathic, HSP introvert. I DEFINITELY "get the game"! I pick up on, and often absorb, others' moods. It's EXHAUSTING!

[TheKjoy]

So, we have established that not all introverts are autistic and that not all autistic are introverted, but am I an autistic introvert or an introverted autistic person because I am both autistic and an introvert. Yes, being both made it just that much more difficult for other people to see and accept that I am autistic. I think that my doctors were so distracted by the introvert side of things that they missed everything else for decades. I was labeled as just shy, quiet, too sensitive, and an introvert.
I am shy because social interactions are so difficult that I usually don't know how to start them. I am quiet because I am semi-non-verbal, they now say it is selective mutism but it is more than that. I am too sensitive to sensory stimuli, both my emotions and those of others, to how people treat me and talk to me. I am an introvert. I draw both energy and the ability to self-regulate from alone time. My preferred hobbies are things that I can enjoy by myself or share with others to some degree such as reading, photography, sewing, arts and crafts, cooking, and baking. I have had only a few really close friends and most of them chose me as a friend, I didn't seek them out.

[TVTransmo]

I'm 48 years old and always thought that I was a weird-nerdy-quirky-socially awkward-introvert. I had a work related accident 9 years ago and been struggling to figure out what to do since then. I cant work full-time with tools any more and I struggle to concentrate on mental stuff that doesn't interest me.
Then 3 weeks ago welfare office send me to 2 psychologist (at once) due to possible depression and/or ptsd. They concluded that I was on the spectrum and I now await an appointment with a psychiatrist who is going to do the final screening and determine where on the spectrum I am and if anything else should be added.
I try not to go hypochondriac and diagnose myself before the appointment, but took an online test and scored 42.
It all make sense now :)

[mikmook]

There are differences but also similarities. I'm an introvert but I saw a comment by someone who is autistic a while back saying they find it difficult to know when to enter a conversation in a group. People just seem to talk over each other and they didn't understand the rules. It might be for different reasons but a lot of introverts can relate to that. You're waiting for someone to finish speaking before you offer your opinion but then someone else jumps in and you end up saying nothing. It seems rude. Like thinking "I have something more important to say than you so I'm going to talk over you." A good thing about talking to introverts is that you get to finish a sentence. I've often been told that I'm a good listener, probably because I'm not interrupting all the time. You say we get the game but don't want to play it. Sort of. The rules of the game were written by extroverts, which is why we don't want to play. Introverts are often seen as unsociable and distant, but it depends on the situation. We dislike small talk but can talk for hours about something which interests us. I've heard autistic people say the same about small talk. Not unsociable, just want to connect with people in a more meaningful way than talking about the weather. It's raining. Yep. Introverts can also feel overstimulated but I think that's always down to needing a break from other people. That's enough humans for today. Time to read a book. I think that feeling of being overstimulated is more general for people with autism right? I might be wrong.

[mistingwolf]

"[Introverts] get the game, they just don't like playing it." This, for me, is a perfect analogy. I love, love, love being left alone to do my own thing. COVID was a mixed blessing; while there were a lot of troubles in the world and I was worried for my loved ones, it paved the way for me to get away from the office permanently and I am much happier. I opted out of a "fun in-office party" because the stresses of packing my work things, trying to find parking, being at a desk I know was going to be uncomfortable at, and having to be around other people is just too much trouble. I do enjoy spending time with family or friends on occasion, but if I had the choice, I would just hermit up and stay home.

[Kochanuts]

I’ve always wondered if I’m actually an introvert or just prefer my own company and am exhausted from being misunderstood or pretending to play a part to fit in. I can actually be quite extroverted and energetic if I happen to find myself among like-minded people. I wish it happened more often. I’m so lonely.

[BadNessie]

Hi there, introvert here! Thank you for the good content! I would also like to point out as an addition to your own topic, as it's often confused, an introvert is not automatically socially anxious. Some may be, but it's not a default! ❤️

[marie-bernadettebenedict]

I am both autistic and introverted. My favourite way to spend most of my day is in an empty Church; praying, reading, silently contemplating, playing piano for around 7 hours a day. This gives me interior peace, and makes social interaction possible as it fills my battery, but I must return to this consistent environment to refill. My second favourite place is my bedroom, where my bed is my ‘nest’, with weighted blankets, heat pads and swuishdmallows. I keep a weighted blanket at Church too and no one minds that I’m often found in a corner of the Church out of the way with my blanket and a pillow laying down and praying, or sitting and writing or reading.

[jamistardust]

I'm an autistic introvert with an avoidant personality. I was diagnosed with the 2 conditions in 1997 . I was 62. I loved your video. I'm glad that Autism has become something that can be diagnosed. it would have helped me when I was young.

[bbdh]

I considered myself an introvert for a long time. Turns out I'm just an (undiagnosed) autistic person with introverted tendencies. Thanks for helping me tease apart these two overlapping phenomenon, and all the other content!

[einahsirro]

That was actually very informative. I have wondered for a long time if I was on the autism spectrum because I'm an introvert who is occasionally socially awkward (especially when I was young.) But your video convinces me that I am just a garden variety introvert who was raised by (also) reclusive introverts, so the social skills I had to painstakingly learn were not unavailable to me due to brain wiring, but just to family and cultural handicap (white rural Protestant Midwestern Americans are not famous for their social sophistication.) I'm sensitive, and dislike bright lights and loud noises, but I can deal with them. II've never had a meltdown in my life, and have learned to be responsive to other people's cues, so... yeah... I think I'm just an introvert. Thank you!

[ETAonTheEUC]

I'm not autistic, but I am a big introvert. This is very interesting stuff to me and you've explained it very well! Thanks!

[gd]

The big difference between a autistic person and an introvert i think is that in the company of the right people they can turn off the introvert. Like I'm an anti social introvert due to an abusive childhood. In the company of most people act exactly like a text book introvert. Around my wife and kids I'm fairly normal.