The Difference Between the Fearful Avoidant and Anxiously Attached Individual!

Stop Abandonment & Rejection in A Relationship Anxious Attachment Style Re-Programming Course:

I post every other day, and you'll find some completely new content there :)

Thank you for watching!

[maryhargrave]

I initially identified as an anxious attachment, but once I get into a solid relationship, I become a fearful avoidant. As I experience outside stressors not related to the relationship, I subconsciously push away my partner. Also if I feel the slightest shift in our relationship I take on the attitude of "I'll hurt you before you hurt me". Awareness is key. Thank you for your videos

[witchymama]

This makes a lot of sense. I am fearful avoidant but I always dated other fearful avoidants or anxious attached. It wasn’t until my last partner who is dismissive avoidant, that i felt like an anxious attached person. I hate the feeling.

[MsGuitars]

Loved this video. Also I kinda feel like almost all dogs are anxiously attached 😂

[aprylsaurusrexx]

I was an anxious preoccupied but after i went through so much pain in my previous relationship im seeing more fearful avoidant tendancies. Overachieving at work and school, being afraid to be in a relationship, making myself "perfect" for the next person. Verh heavily independent.

[Feedaneeshaqua]

I used to be anxiously attached but now I've transitioned into a fearful avoidant. Meeting someone who's also a fearful avoidant and who hurt me because of it, has pushed me to learn more about myself and work towards becoming more secure.

[chloehammond]

HOW THE HECK DOES SHE ONLY HAVE 51 K FOLLOWERS?! SHE DESERVES WAY MORE! Love this channel ❤️

[SpiralJoel]

Hi
I am Fearful avoidant I feel safest with breakup energy or a exit date. Thats when I share deeper feelings and cry. Thats when I feel so seen and heard. Intense emotions blow out from the resentment I have for my weakness which is my ability to set preferences. Boundary setting in real time ain’t no joke. I am working on it thanks for the help. Oh and your talking much better since this video. I hear less “ummms”Good work. I love those writing exercises too. The one about what stories do I attach to moments when my needs aren’t being met is very helpful. Thanks again for stepping in to the Arena PDS

[ahobimo]

Thank you for the extensive amount of information you've provided on this topic. It's been very hard for me to figure this out for myself. It was very helpful for me to think of it as a ratio like you suggested at the end.

The funny thing about my attachment style is that I flip from "seeking" to "avoiding" very abruptly. And no matter which mode I am in, it is always extreme. Usually when I am in a relationship, I act very anxiously attached - until I reach a "breaking point", and then I suddenly become extremely avoidant. Sometimes the avoidant behaviour is short lived, but it is always intense. And most of the time, I just avoid relationships altogether, choosing to be alone rather than risk getting hurt.

[beckym]

Different partners create different styles in me. I think I'm right on the cusp with fearful avoidant and anxious. When I get really comfortable with someone, I start to take them for granted. I seem to seek out company that makes me feel stirred up! Initially, that's exciting and then, Ugh... exhausting.

[MAzurburg]

According to the quiz on the website my attachment style is mostly fearful avoidant with equal amount dismissive and fearful. Interestingly I feel a lot more shame towards my anxious traits than towards my dismissive traits.

[lincris]

I’m FA and you described me so accurately! I threaten to leave all the time. As a former dismissive avoidant, I hate it! I suffer so much now, and it used to be so easy 😥

[luketimewalker]

OOOh I was just confused tonight by a great video from someone else describing the FA and finding it sounded a LOT like your DA, and now I find this old video that explains it all. You've done so much since that video!

[khadijathaliru]

You look absolutely smashing today, Thais!

[smileyface]

Hands up all the other FAs who thought they were another adult attachment style before discovering they were FA ✋ now that I know I'm FA, it's so clear! And I'm so thankful for Thais doing such in-depth and clear content about all the attachment styles, especially FA because it gets the least attention

[gezor]

"subconscious strategies to push the person away.." so recognisable in the second relationship.. seems like all that happened had given her arguments to leave me, without me actually allowed to just work it out with her..

[jasminejohnson]

I’ve been anxious attachment since I started dating. Met my twin flame last year and turned into fearful avoidant once we parted.

A con is: this sucks.
A pro: I feel like this is my last hump before I’m secure.

I’m more aware of my actions and emotions. I now know what boundaries are and how to use them (Although I still get nervous putting them in place), I don’t fear being alone anymore and I want to heal!

This journey is long ash but worth it.

If you’re trying to become secure and an overall better you… I’m proud of you. Keep up the good work. You’re doing great.

[iconoclastic-fantastic]

I had anxious attachment, and then I went through a traumatizing breakup, and became a fearful avoidant. Truly the worst one-time experience (ie not ongoing like the childhood trauma I experienced) of my life. It completely destroyed me. But now I just want to heal for good. Because I can't go through something like that again.

[desikrus]

This video was super helpful as it finally enabled me to figure out my attachment style on the spectrum (I was hesitating between the two in the past). Thank you so much! Now I've got the road of re-programming ahead. And I'm grateful I have you as inspiration and support along this road! Thank you!

[djenning]

“I might stop the video, but I’m not going to for now”… then the video stops and you briefly give us a “deer in the headlights” look… that was so cute and funny! I love it when your personality comes out like this in your videos.

[emilykayisit]

This is very helpful, I have watched a lot of dating coaching videos, finally these attachment styles solve my questions in my head! Thanks so much