Boyfriend Wants To 'Test-Run' Living Together! (He Will Propose If I Do Well)

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[ak]

I got married at almost 30 yrs of age. One of my values was remaining a virgin until I got married. I can't tell you the amount of men who I dated who tried to talk me into sex, and then quickly dumped me after they realized I was serious about remaining a virgin. The ONLY guy who never tried to cross boundaries and was very respectful of my values was the man I ended up marrying. I never had a moments trouble with him during our dating. I asked him about that one day and he responded, "Well, I'm planning on marrying you anyways, so there is no problem with me waiting, and what is important to you is important to me." We have been married for over 8 years and three kids later, he is the best partner I could have ever asked for. If a man really wants to marry you, he will make your beliefs and priorities important to him.

[prudencek]

To the caller, the advice they gave you is not an ultimatum, it is a boundary. Set the boundaries you want; your boundaries are there for your protection.

[kerryfitting]

She knew something was up or she wouldn't have called. Follow your gut, girl! We wish you the best!

[lmcg....]

He's a tester, it will never end, there will be tests til the bitter end and you will hate it. You don't want a tester, there's no trust and constant scutiny.

[larissaalcorn]

"He will propose if I do well." This dude is already treating her like a child. Run.

[queenu]

She’s going to move in because she’s known him since middle school🙄. She’s too invested in this relationship to not do it. She sounds naive.

[cita_m]

Girl, I would run like the gingerbread man. He's essentially asking you to interview for the position of being his wife.

[brandya.g.]

Never do wife duties at girlfriend prices.

[alphafemale]

Take it from a woman who moved in with her boyfriend 24 years ago while he was living in the basement of his brother's house. He proposed, we bought a house prior to getting married. Everything was 50/50 then and it still is now. All transactional, void of intimacy, emotional fulfillment just blah. He is a roommate to me today. Don't do it. Men become dependent on your half and don't care what it takes for you to meet your end. They just need a willing partner. Let him handle the bills AFTER he marries her. He is supposed to be a provider. These 50/50 relationships become very neglectful in the future and her naivety is what he has on his side right now. I was young and dumb, too. I can't get the years back but she can save herself the trouble now. I wouldn't even pay a percentage.

[ceecee]

Don't play house. Don't give wifey benefits when you're not a wifey yet. Soul ties are real!

[TyB]

Basically the guy wants you to audition to be his wife... If he doesn't want to marry you now out of love, then why would he 18 months from now.

[kaitlinmasten]

You can still live separately and spend significant time together and see how he manages a household- see if he wants a partner or needs a mother.

[James_Hough]

A "test run" shows shows a lack of commitment. Plain and simple.

[stephenjacquelitle]

Don't give in. Run. He's waving a big RED flag.

[melanieb]

My boyfriend asked me to move up with him. I said no. He said "will you marry me" I said yes.

[traceejohnson]

Also a Proposal is Not Marriage, wait until married. There are many couples that stay engaged for many years.

[tanyad]

Your life is not a used car dealership. No, he can’t take your for a test drive. You’re not a used vehicle. Ridiculous.

[EdelweisSusie]

One additional point John should have said to Celest - DON'T GET PREGNANT!!!
On a personal note this video is so enlightening as it highlighted that had my ex and stayed together, the 'benefits' would all have been in his favour ie HE would have had the live-in lover, the sensational cook, the great homemaker, the willing companion for trips/holidays/adventures, the empathetic ear to HIS work problems etc but what would I have got out of it? NO engagement ring, NO offer of marriage (he'd been 'burned' by his wife), NO 'equal partners' who are there for one another no matter what. WOW - did I dodge a bullet !!!

[tvlergee]

Poor girl, I can tell by how sweet she sounds she’s not gonna take this advice. Hopefully she makes the team 🤷🏽‍♂️

[brianlewis]

There are too many good men out there who would sacrifice their lives for the women they love...this guy doesn't sound like one of them.