Love On The Spectrum (Review By Autistic Person)

Netflix released Love on the Spectrum to an international audience this July, but what does an autistic person think about it?

An honest review by an autistic person can't be hard to find... surely? ;)

What did you think of Love on the Spectrum? Comment below

[YoSamdySam]

Be sure to complain about the reflection on my glasses right down here 👇

[dracawyn]

I went back and forth between "is this representation or is this exploitation?" It was cute and I really liked most of the people but some if the framing and music choices made me wonder if they were being made fun of. At points, I got old-timey freakshow vibes.

[rainboSnails]

auto-generated captions wrote "neurotypical gaze" as "neurotypical gays" and i honestly find that hilarious

[allbymyshelf]

The reaction to the show has really made me uncomfortable. So many people have watched it, which is great, but because it's made for the neurotypical gaze I've heard a lot of "It's so inspiring", "What a heartwarming show!" and the vibe I get as well is that we are almost a spectacle for people who want to see how the 'mysterious' autistic person lives. I think the representation is so much better than a lot of things out there right now, but we still have a long way to go.

[MD-difi]

Maybe there can be a small group of older people on the spectrum who could share their life experience and give some advice to the cast.

[TheOakleysworld]

As an autistic person who has been fortunate enough to have a fairly good dating experience overall, I completely agree on your takes about the coach. The most successful dates I've ever had with people who were identified (or suspected) autistic, involved meeting up at a comfortable/familiar setting. One of our homes for example. And I know to neurotypical people, that may sound absurd. But when unfamiliar and unpredictable surroundings can be the most stressful and traumatic aspect of your life, this can be a great option. The worst dates I've ever had were when meeting in bars. These were always uncomfortable, distressing and unproductive. Maybe I should be a dating coach for my fellow autists? xD

[studionightshade]

I was neutral about the show. I did find certain parts patronizing and agree about the coach... She seems like a nice lady but isn't necessary. I'd like to see more autism people that aren't living at home represented. Some of us managed to get jobs, own homes, and struggled quietly before diagnosis for years. Dating as an autistic person still sucks, even if you manage to overcome the other obstacles that represent "adulthood" in the Western world. More diversity (other races, LBGTQ+) maybe get more feedback from autistic people on how to edit the show in a way that illuminates the characters instead of putting the spotlight on the awkward. We're all awkward. No need to make it the running theme.

[hfenring]

I like that take : "Show where neurotypicals are gawking at autistics like they're zoo animals.". I don't want to believe that the show creators had that in mind, but in a way it felt as such.
It wasn't an entirely bad representation of autism and I did enjoy watching the show, but there's a lot that can and should be improved for season 2. But I'm not holding my breath, since this show seems to be targeted at neurotypical audience. I don't believe it will ever have the same impact and honesty as, for example, Hannah Gadsby's "Nannette" and "Douglas" specials.

[karatepop]

The issue, for me, with the popularity of the show is the expansion from that. Michael has been SO popular - and NT people are fascinated with him, and are reducing autism to, once again, straight white male who likes trains. Further than that, though, are the interviews, which include his mother who repeatedly says there was "something wrong" with him and she says she wants him to mask, to fit in, or he won't get by. NOTHING about changing systems or advocating change, etc. Ugh. She's a nightmare.. I think Unemployables and the Undateables are HUGELY problematic.

[viennadesou]

I feel like the entire dating premise IS trying to fit neurodiverse people into NT life. It seems like there is a very narrow mindset for how dating and relationships are meant to set off. That awkward "job interview" like introduction...there's got to be a better way around that. Not the show's fault but just my 2 cents.

[thevirtualjim]

"This is a show about autistic people? why would we WANT autistic people involved in running it? Why WOULDN'T we make it all about trying to make autistic people fit into an NT world? Why WOULDN'T we put so much focus on their NT families instead of the autistic people themselves. We HAVE to infantilize the autistic people, otherwise how could we make them out to be disabled otherwise?"
- all the people who made nearly ever show about autistic people.

Sure in this show I liked the autistic people themselves but as you pointed out everything else about the show sucked and i was very upset about iu. Also michael's family just laughs at him all thre time - i feel so bad for him and that young woman who has been convinced that her happy stim is really some unknown muscular diysfunction? I wish i could help them!

[arasharfa]

The patronising tone seems to be the core definition of the NT gaze

[TheWhitePhoenix]

Incidentally the show that motivated me to look into my own autism diagnosis and ultimately led me here. Not perfect by any means but a stepping stone in the right direction. Also if it helps those of us in the generation that missed out on early detection then it's all the better.

[vegansauce]

I believe Paul from Aspergers From The Inside is a relationship coach, and he also lives in Australia. Of course, I have no clue if he would be interested in taking on this commitment at the moment.

[weirdosnextdoor]

I feel the same way, and looking forward to season 2. Fingers crossed we get more inclusion and less looking at us like zoo animals. Focus on their personal journeys rather than the shock value of Autistic moments like stimming or getting confused or panic attacks.

[laurakurkowski]

I have avoided watching this series primarily for the main concern that if it was patronizing, it would disappoint and upset me greatly. However, what put me off the most was the mainstream media embracing and focusing on the men in the show. I’m not seeing that same mainstream reaction about the women and it concerns me that society is more ok with autistic traits being exhibited by a man than they are with autism in women. (You’ve already eloquently addressed many times on your channel that autism in women is not recognized/understood at this point in time.)

[awkward]

I wish there was more discussion about masking, and about differences in AFAB people, and about stimming, and about sensory things. Those are all going to play a role in people's relationships anyway, isn't it worth discussing?

[diannepenny]

I agree about the relationship coach: it was cringeworthy, watching her leaning in really close and eye-balling her poor 'student'!

[justinevans]

I did not like it, felt forced and inauthentic,

[MarkScheffer]

I agree with you, NT's producing a reality show about Autism for entertainment, contrived at best, not a fan of reality shows anyway. One could argue that this brings awareness to the mainstream, surely there are better ways to do this?