Faith Crisis: What Do We Do When We Feel Nothing?

“Dad, I can’t do it anymore. I’m gay.” Michael Mclean’s son had come out to him. “Dad, I’ve tried to do everything you said. I went on my mission. I was an Eagle Scout. And I don’t know how to get through it.” Michael felt his son’s pain and wanted to support him. So, he turned to God in prayer.

Michael had received answers before. He knew they would come, but he felt nothing. It was the first time in his life the heavens felt shut. His prayers couldn’t get past the ceiling. Michael begged God to talk to him.

It was challenging the first weeks and months, but as two years passed, Michael questioned, “What if I got it wrong? Is there really a God who hears my prayers?” He asked himself, “Can I keep the promises I’ve made when my heart feels nothing?” Michael got on his knees and prayed, as he had countless times before.

While Michael prayed, he said, “I don’t know if You’re hearing this, but I’m going to quit whining and moaning. I’m going to trust You. I’m going to trust that, at some point, You’ll communicate with me, and I won’t feel so lost.” Michael didn’t give up hope, but he stopped trying to make himself feel something.

Michael writes songs for a living. After nine years in his faith crisis, he had an extraordinary experience. One day he went into his study. It was as if songs were being downloaded to his mind. He wrote for 10 days and completed 12 songs. Michael’s answers came in those songs. He felt that God had answered him in a way only he could understand. They came directly from God’s heart to his. Michael was overwhelmed by His grace.

Have you ever had a crisis of faith?
What do you do when you feel like God isn’t speaking to you?

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

[Oscar-yfhh]

I've always been against religion, lately I've been feeling down and watched lots of videos from this channel, now I think there is something out there a greater power that wants us to succeed

[jennhoff]

Last night I was begging God to help me feel that He is real. I was so exhausted and discouraged I just slept for 14 hours. Then I woke up and saw this. I mean.... This is amazing. I just made it my homepage so I can watch it every morning for a while.

[ErwinSolorzano]

I typically swipe off Mormon channel YouTube notifications but the title of this video didn't let me this time. I felt like I had to watch it and I'm glad I did. Thank you for sharing your experience! I can't believe I have been taking for granted all this times heavenly father has been trying to save me either. They are more than 25 for me and I have been feeling lost for about 5 years until now. Thank you

[ingvildkvakestad]

I cant Even explain how hard this hit me. I have struggled with numbness and emptiness for years I have struggled with wanting to be here at all. I really related to the have I offended god. Thank you so incredibly much for sharing this I really needed it.

[bryanhill]

"Do not be deceived, Wormwood. Our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys." ~C. S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters

[williamk]

Nice to see I’m not the only one who struggles with feeling nothing.

[Katharine]

I have been struggling with my trial of faith for five years now. This morning I woke up in such deep despair that I wondered whether suicide was the only way out. I have prayed about my struggles and every time I received the simple answer to "have faith." Even though the answers I receive have felt sparse, I try to hold on to every revelation. I had another moment of despair a few weeks ago. As I drove home from church I heard in my mind that "the path will appear when it is hardest to see." I tell myself that the more despair I feel, the closer I am to seeing the path.
I am grateful for this video appearing when I needed it.

[primarycoloredsoul]

I’ve been talking with my teenage son lately about his concerns that he feels so numb despite his efforts to do what is right. I have prayed night and day for him since we first talked, and when I saw this video, I knew it was an answer I was supposed to share with him. I have a feeling it will help, just to know he isn’t the only one who has times like this. The candor expressed in these videos is so touching and a lot more helpful than making everything look perfect in life. We all struggle, and we all have stories to share. When we share, we can bear one another’s burdens more deeply and more effectively. Always a fan of your music, Michael McLean; now I’m a fan of your heart. :)

[tecumseha]

This is LITERALLY what I need to hear right now. Thank you Brother Mclean. I'm going on a nearly 9-year trial of faith now. What you said speaks to my heart. 💙

[markjackson]

We need more "outside the box" stories from saints who struggle and are strong enough to admit it. I never really knew the whole Church, until I was visiting an LDS addiction recovery meeting, and listened to a brother, wearing a BYU t-shirt, talking about his years of heroin addiction.

[UXSpecialist]

This was for me. The best video from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I have seen in many years. I needed to hear this, in fact, I needed this about 18 years ago. Thank you....

[dcrbdh]

I love this story. 20 years ago as a young missionary I listened to his song "Hold on, the light will come". It helped me to keep moving forward as i struggled with mental illness. As my own son now has come out and struggles with whether he wants to stay in the church his ideas are still there to help. The Lord has instructed me on how to act with him, and I dont know how it will all turn out. But I know that God gives peace and help.

[letsjustgetalong]

Amen! A few years ago my life took a turn on a course I never really imagined. I kept trying to put it 'back on track' but I couldn't no matter what I did. And I felt scared, and angry and resentment. And then, I said, God, my life is yours. All I have, all I am is yours and he gave me the eyes to see that my life his on HIS course and it doesn't look like everyone else's and ITS OKAY. In fact it's meant to be.. and I put my trust in Him and that's when I began feeling peace.. real peace..

[aidinthedark]

I may not have struggled the same way, but i have struggled for longer, and god has blessed me this day for bringing me an answer to my prayers from years past. Thank you Mclean.

[naturefleur]

I love everything, everything about this video, ESPECIALLY that he deeply experienced the grace of God and mentioned it twice. We members of the Lord’s restored church, like all human beings, need his grace every hour of every day *and* we need to express this until every Latter-day Saint becomes familiar with this concept. Not just the Atonement, but also the power that is called grace that flows to us from it. Because of Jesus. ❤

[magaliguardia]

"His grace was trying to save me"
So powerful ♥️

[DoNotGoQuietly]

The feeling of numb emptiness you told is what I've felt for 5 years now. Thank you for sharing this message and helping me to see the blind eye I have turned to all of the many blessings I have had poured out upon my life. You have helped inch a lost one back to the light.

[nightshadow]

For 26 years, I never received an answer as you hear in primary, or Sunday school, or at every testimony meeting. I had always known there was a God because I could see his effect in peoples lives and I had a few things happen to me that indicated which way the wind blew, but I"d never had that burning bosom feeling everyone talks about. I didn't have thoughts come to my mind, I just didn't have anything that fit the box I'd been taught about. I thought, "well maybe God just doesn't talk to me like he talks to everyone else". I also had to learn that God deals with us individually. He answers us individually in the way we can learn. We can't always see it because we get into our habits or think we know what to look for, but he's always there, whether we see it or not.

[sophielong]

I was just praying and had the thought to look up a Mormon message on YouTube. This was the first one to come up. As soon as it started, I realized I’ve seen a longer version of it before! I used to show this video to others while serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I had completely forgotten about it and all the memories of the things that I would testify about after the video, came flooding back to me. I can’t believe that I have forgotten so many of these spiritual truths that I used to know. I’ve been struggling lately, and I know this was an unexpected way that Heavenly Father answered my prayers. I really love God and Im so grateful for Him:) this is just what I needed.

[numa.k]

All day yesterday I thought THE EXACT WORDS of this title to this video. Then I came across this video, I would say randomly but no, no this was divine intervention. I needed this ❤️