Codependency and Creativity

INFJ personality types and INFP personality types tend to struggle severely with codependency throughout life. This can be extremely detrimental to our creative lives because codependency is a major block to creativity.

When we are in a codependent relationship with someone, we often will hold ourselves back from doing anything that is threatening to the other person. We will accommodate the other person’s preferences and desires over our own needs, and end up betraying ourselves over and over again. Creativity requires us to take risks, and often these risks can be threatening to other people, especially someone who might be the other half of our codependent relationship.

Within codependent relationships, INFJ personality types and INFP personality types also tend to play pre-defined roles. We may be playing out roles with the other person such as narcissist-enabler or rescuer-victim. Whatever roles are present in the relationship, both parties usually expect that those roles will not change, and that they will remain constant over time. In contrast, creativity changes us at a deep level, and the deeper we get into any kind of creative process, the more we will question our current roles in life and the energy of our relationships.

Every time we hit a codependent block to our creativity, we are being given the opportunity to shatter an old, outdated pattern that no longer serves us. However, we must choose to surrender to the process of the pattern being shattered. If we resist it, it’s likely that we will stay entrenched in codependency.

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[colonelgraff]

Codependency is like running a three legged race and the other person won’t move with you.

[reneknecht]

Healing from codependency has the biggest potential for personal development for INFJ’s. Because our energy field is in a state of leakage if we are not aware of the toxic patterns. It is a game changer if you start noticing it! If you become aware of the toxic patterns in relationships characterized by codependency and narcissisism a never ending development cycle will be started.

I learned a lot of the different courses and books of Lauren and for me it was a point of no return. This program is indeed spot on.

[cledosliop]

After I graduated from college, I started working at a service-oriented job that I disliked. The work didn't require the skills I had learned in school, and it mainly involved serving others daily. Although it was a safe and stable job, it was also very boring and some of my coworkers and bosses had narcissistic traits. I found it exhausting to constantly communicate with them and after two years, I finally decided to make a change. I quit my job, planning to pursue writing, but when I tried, I realized I was suffering from severe creativity blockage. It took me almost three years to heal from this, and that was when I began to learn more about the concept of codependency and how to heal it. Some of the points you mentioned in this video were my true experiences; really spot on.

[aquariusstar]

I feel like a lot of my creative self is trapped in my childhood. I was always trying to draw, write, but the heaviness of my mother wound kept that energy from flowing. I could feel her jealousy and i loved to sing and perform in private. I often hid this from my parents. Once seen by my mother it was shut down. Even when taking courses as an adult, i become so self-conscious and i have a hard time enjoying the process. Everything is about proving i am worthy or deserving of doing what i love.

[jla]

it's like being an energy dispenser

[sharonfuszard]

You're spot on Lauren about being the 'Unofficial Counsellor. Back in the day I would have 'Friends' who would only contact me when they needed access to my skill as unpaid counsellor. I've come to realize that to a' friend' who is a narcissist, this access constitutes a form of narcissistic supply.

[barbaracapes]

Love you Lauren!❤❤ You are so spot on with this! I enjoy learning from you.
Had a wonderful session with you this week in Sage Adderly's Quest back to Self. Thank you for all you do!

[yukio_saito]

I no longer care about whatever happens to toxic people. I walk away as soon as a chronic talker comes to me. 🚶‍♂💨💨🚩
Even a "paid" counselor has a time limit, so you don't need to keep on listening to those who disrespect your time.

[maitan]

I love you Lauren, thank you for all the work you do for us.