What They Don’t Tell Fathers About Raising Sons

00:00 - Intro
00:31 - The Three Stages Of Growing Up
00:38 - Their First Lesson
01:18 - What Just Happened To My Little Boy?
02:36 - When Things Began To Change
02:59 - Necessary Challenges
03:45 - Sacrificing For That Which Is Noble
04:47 - The Lesson Taught By Example
05:14 - Before You Know It...
05:40 - The Final Stages Of Preparation
05:50 - It's His Alone To Earn
06:25 - The Hardest Part Of Being A Father
07:20 - One Of My Earliest Memories
08:35 - Legacy
09:05 - When I Get Tired

[MarkJones-yurs]

Just finished reading ‘Raising Warriors: Preparing Your Children For a Godly Life’ and it really opened my eyes to some new ways of guiding my kids in their faith. Highly recommend it if you’re looking to strenghten your family’s spiritual life

[sillymonger]

I'm a trained counsellor and psychologist and this may be the best most well balanced take on masculinity, raising sons and the responsibility that fathers have towards our boys.

[mariecolin]

"Learning to stand for what is right, even when it costs you something, is the hallmark of a good man" -Nick

[shanemalcolm]

Im a 53 year old “Man among Men”, masculine and rugged.
Strong survivor of a broken home, abuse and child molestation.
Im also a survivor of military service, and a (now resigned) fire fighter.
I’ve lived a mans life.
And yet without the kind of paternal guidance shown here i had no idea that i had failed my children, and in so many ways, until it was too late. Something that i can only fully see now in retrospect.
I sit here and type thru the blur of tears and wish id heard this 35 years ago
You’re some sort of guru sir, and the calibre of man i only thought i was

[GarryCarlson-ir]

I pretty much grew up fatherless, my mom died of cancer when I was 17 so I was on my own. I vowed to myself when i was a young teenager that I want to be the father I never had when I had kids. Now, 40 some years later, I have two sons and a daughter, stable house, wife of 27 years and the knowing that my kids have the father that I wish i had at their age. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!

[FawehinmiOluwatobi]

The most touching line for me is this - "for those who do not have that it's a legacy that you begin. And there is something truly noble about a man who overcomes the absence of their own father to ensure that their son does not suffer the same loss..."

Merci, Nick.

[joshclark]

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭22‬:‭6‬ ‭

Thanks for this encouragement Nick

[falconheart]

I had a very weak father and a controlling, manipulative, smothering mother. I can confirm that if you’re not presented with challenges you have to overcome in spite of pain, fear, and discomfort, you DO remain a boy. When my parents died I was woefully unprepared. I’m 43, and I’ve got the life experience of a 24 year old. But I am making progress, and slowly learning. Thankfully, I have another father in heaven who hasn’t forgotten about me.

EDIT:
Didn’t expect this to get this much attention. But since it has.. some of the things that have helped me may help you as well. YouTubers like Nick. The lectures of Jordan Peterson. A book I found particularly helpful was No More Mr Nice Guy by Dr Robert Glover. Very helpful for understanding and overcoming the root of my problem: believing that masculinity is somehow inherently bad and should be suppressed rather than nurtured.

[pressureaudio]

"There is something truly noble about a man who overcomes the absence of their own father to ensure that their son doesn't suffer the same loss" - These words hit home, I am a father to a son and my father willingly left my mother and brother early in life. I don't have a template to look to but I will raise this boy

[Johnnymanitoba]

This is exactly what I needed to hear. I had no one to show me how to be a husband or a father, at least until I was 10 then my stepfather came along and had shown me what respect looks like. I’m a father of sons and a daughter and I’m trying so patiently teach them what their values are in their roles. I’ve listened to this every day on my drive home from work and when I pull into the driveway I say to myself, be present, be the light, don’t be a jerk and my hurt isn’t their hurt. And it’s been working as sometimes I have trouble shaking off my day. Thank you for this. I know this comment will slip through the cracks but this one is specifically for you to read if you do see it.

[JpGunsNRoses]

"For those who were blessed with fathers and grandfathers who showed us the way, its a legacy that you preserve. And for those who do not have that, its a legacy you begin".

[Coolbrz]

As a new dad with a son this advice is a great starting point.

[kirkdjackson]

I need more of this!!! I’m a father to three cubs and a daughter. No one is willing to speak about raising boys like this, but it is so needed now. Thank you!

[terrydaniels]

I have tears in my eyes listening to you Nick. I am a single Mom and my amazing Son was raised by me, my mom and my grandma. All the men in our family bailed and were absent. I believe I did a good job giving my Son the necessary tools, support and love and respect both verbally and with my actions. I say this, because today he is 38 yrs old, he is an amazing Man. He works hard, he understands delayed gratification to reach his goals and he is kind and thoughtful. I appreciate your wise words to all parents who have the good fortune to find this video. Thank you. Respectfully, Terry Daniels, California💖

[tlb]

I just turned 60 last week. I'm a husband of 38 years, a Father of three adult children, and a Grandfather of four. Yes, I capitalize those titles. Not because of anything I've done, but in honor of the Fathers and Grandfathers who taught me, whom I still strive to emulate.
My two brothers and me were raised by both parents and our grandparents on my Father's side lived across the street.
All four were instrumental in making me who I am today, the wonderful adults our children have grown up to be, and, prayerfully, in the adults my grandchildren will one day become.
My Father got up before everyone else and went to work every day in a U. S. Army ammunition plant where he worked for 34 years. He still made time for us boys.
My Mother stayed home and raised us till we all were in school. Then she took a job.
Dad and Papaw taught us so much. By the time we graduated high school, my brothers and me had learned to roof a house, paint a house, overhaul an engine, maintain a home, maintain a vehicle, raise a garden, maintain a yard, help our neighbors, and carry our own weight.
Mom and Granny taught us how to cook, how to mend clothes, how to sew and crochet, how to launder, fold, and iron our clothes. Also, how to can and freeze our garden vegetables and wild berries picked in season. And how to sweep and mop the floor, take out the trash, and change a diaper.
We got our share of whippings. We earned them all and often reflect on how thankful we are for every one we got.
We learned to love, protect, and preserve family. To respect and honor women and our elders. We learned to value our freedom and those who earned it and preserve it.
We learned to vote and to be responsible citizens who contribute to our community, not take from it.
We learned how to work hard and enjoy abundant, fulfilling, joyful living.
I'm glad your videos and shorts showed up on my feed.
And I hope you do get to enjoy the unequaled joy of becoming a Grandfather and the precious moments and memories that come as you enter your golden years.
We're so blessed that all our adult children are well adjusted, responsible adults, citizens, and parents and all have good careers. They all share the beliefs and values handed down through our family for decades. Together, we all are passing them on to our grandchildren who are very receptive at their current ages.
We all, however, are very aware of the challenges that exist in raising them in our current world where so many bad influences, wrong information, and political agendas are being thrust at them when children should NEVER have to deal with such things.
May God continue to richly bless you and yours.
Please keep your videos coming.
Our country and the world needs the truth you are speaking and the laughter your shorts inspire as they also teach.

[magdabadrena]

We had six sons. The amount of times my husband would take me aside and tell me what to do or not do about different situations that arose with our sons. Every time he was spot on and I was glad I paid attention to his advice.

[corndawg]

I grew up without a father, and now my wife and I have been blessed with a son. I've worried no end that I won't be able to show him the right path, but you talking about the nobility of fatherless men setting their own legacy for their sons, really hit a cord. It made me realise that I do have it within myself to guide him. Thank you!

[matthadden]

As a boy who learned how to be a man in his 20's, I cant thank men like yourself, JBP, and Jocko enough. Keep pushing the message and help this nation repair the problems that start at home. You are a guiding light in the ever growing darkness!

[dylanholding]

I honestly desperately needed to hear this video. My son is 4 and it feels like I've kinda just been present in his life. I dont know what im doing, and I have no idea what a father is supposed to be. My dad sat in his room high off his gourd on prescription pills after my mom died and i just raised myself.
So thank you for this. It felt like the first actual guidance and advice I've ever heard since i became a dad.

[DerekIngram-ue]

As a child my life was brutal, until the age of 12, then homelessness until 17, at the age of thirty I had a son, he is now 33, and I have from time to time questioned if I had done enough, I stumbled across your post by accident, and all the values you have highlighted are pretty much the ones I’ve
Shared with my son, and I am truly proud of him, he is now a father himself, and i watch him with his daughter, and he does all the things I used to do with him as a child. He absolutely touches my soul, so thank you for your post, great advice. :-)