The Rise Of Individualism: Why Community Is Dead

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#community #individualism #selfimprovement

Timestamps:
Intro: 0:00
The 5 Biggest Factors: 0:41
Political Interest: 1:42
Civic Engagement: 3:02
Religious Participation: 4:15
Unions/Workplaces: 5:27
Informal Social Connections: 7:24
Honesty, Trust, and Reciprocity: 9:51
Shortform: 12:13
Urban Sprawl: 13:46
What's Left Unexplained: 15:35
What's The Solution?: 16:16
How To Make More Friends: 20:28

Topics: why community is important, how to make friends, the rise of loneliness, why loneliness is bad, isolation, individualism vs collectivism

[ColeHastings]

Let me know what you guys think about this in the comments.

[Simon-tcmc]

Gen Z here and I hate this virtual world we've become dependent on. Everything is fake and it's so bad for our mental health. Let's all take the steps to rebuild our communities and actually have face to face interactions with people.

[sDude]

I'm 41. Growing up house parties where a big part of making friends and finding partners. I could never afford a house to create my own social events. No one young now can afford a house to create social events. I didn't choose the internet and social isolation. I suspect a lot of so called internet addicted people are just working with what they have.

[agedefyingfitness]

People look at me strange for attempting conversations lol Very odd times indeed. It's comical how disconnected we are from each other however it's much more disturbing than comical.

[danielcausevic]

I was actually reflecting about this today, and I found out that it's because there's no need to be a part of a community anymore. We got institutions for everything. Back then if you were excluded it was pretty bad, nowadays you can just move places easily and people are too tired these days to make any new or lasting friendships.

[sasz]

I think there is more to this lack of a sense of community than what you've said here. There was already a lack of community in the U.S. in the 80s and 90s. I remember asking my parents about this. They felt that TV as a source of entertainment was a huge one, since before people spent time talking to each other more as entertainment. Neighbors used to know one another. I asked them why that was. Oddly - they said the fact that everyone has air conditioning now and keeps their windows closed was another reason. Before people kept their windows open because they didn't have air conditioning. Before, women were not in the workforce the way they are now. They were home more. This led to women hanging out over each other's houses and talking to each other more. People also had more kids. Now, a lot of people have no kids, or they have maybe 1 kid, maximum 2 kids. Before people had 4 and 5 kids. The kids had friends, and the parents met their kids' friends' parents and made friends that way. Church was a major source of community that most people don't participate in now. Families used to sit down and have dinner together. We weren't allowed to watch TV during dinner. Who does that now? There started to be less trust between people when bad news started to be broadcast on TV more. In the 70s, you heard more and more about people who went missing when they went hitchhiking, or about people kidnapping children, etc. People began locking their doors more and began letting their children play outside with the neighborhood kids less out of fear. If someone rings your doorbell, who even answers the door now? If someone calls on the phone and you don't know who it is, do you pick up the phone? Before we didn't have caller ID, so you always picked up the phone because otherwise you might miss a call from someone you wanted to talk to. What about the fact that everyone is working now? No one is home during the day, so people just don't have time for socializing anymore? People are tired. It's sad, but true.

[kexerino]

I think hustle culture could also be a part of the equation. If you're focusing on making money and think that social activities are a distraction or just something to improve your social status, then you're not gonna help build real communities.

[tonatiuhnino]

I think it's because no matter how much you try to make new friends, they end up leaving you for new jobs and opportunities.

[hal]

I miss the internet when it was just a tool for communication, not a distorted extension of our reality. It creeps me out.

[TheRealestTiller]

"We can never get a re-creation of community and heal our society without giving our citizens a sense of belonging." ~ Patch Adams

[juanjacobomoracerecero]

This isn't happening just in the United States but in the entire western world, even in Latin America, at least in the big cities. My Dad and uncles have preserved their friends from childhood and different stages in their lives...but since my generation (Millennials) people don't preserve their friends of the past, your friends are the two or three you hang out with currently and if you move or change your job, you lost contact with them, I say that currently friendship expires very quickly, it is disposable. But even families are not united anymore, I have cousins I haven't seen in years and I know currently people my age that say the same, they have lost contact with uncles, cousins, the only family they keep in contact with are their parents and brothers/sisters.

[davidedigrande]

I'll mention one thing. As a 28 y/o if you don't like partying or that kind of stuff, you're screwed. It seems that's the only way to create community nowadays. Whenever I get invitations to do something, it's always a drinking night in the club or something like that. I regularly go to the gym, to a yoga studio and do group trekking almost every weekend. I've used Tinder and a similar app but for groups eating out. Yes I've managed to socialize with A LOT of people this way, and made somr stable friendships, but they don't even know each other as they individually have their own groups. This way genuine connection seems impossible, and let's not talk about creating a network. Most of those people seems to already have their own life and social circles that won't include me, of course.

[Finaius]

Sadly, the trend is hard to reverse. I personally have found that one way to foster a sense of community is by pursuing arts and creative work. They provide me a sense of solace and comfort in times of loneliness.

[katiez]

I found society in the 1980s to be much more mean spirited. People may have interacted more but our culture was stifling. Everyone was expected to follow the exact same life script and anyone who did not were socially ostracised. Most of my friends felt like our parents had us just because that was what was expected instead of because they really wanted us.

[cureforintroversion]

The irony is that social media was supposed to be a solution to the problem

[TehWhimsicalWhale]

Your message is truly so sad. I'm even on a local soccer team but the focus is too much on winning and the playing of the sport and less on building friendships and a community. It's been so hard to find a community that isn't religious.

[gachamovies]

I also think the fact that American suburbs have nothing to do forces us to be online. I’m 17. Every Friday I am happy that school is over, I get home, and then it’s like: “now what?”. it forces me to be on my phone for hours. There is genuinely nothing to do here. My mom and her friends have the same problem. On top of that it’s always very cold and there are no pretty sight. I walk outside and it’s 20 degrees outside and all I have to look at are dead trees and dead leaves.

[Odyssey]

People in my country (Pakistan) desire a more individualistic lifestyle because of too much "community". People at your place want vice versa. Nobody likes what they have!

[jonnygraham]

“People have to work two jobs just to exist at this point and there is no time to actually build a sense of community”

Damn

[kolter]

Community is only dead if you allow yourself to pull away and don’t engage. Most people on social media aren’t actually SOCIAL. Most people don’t comment on things they see or watch, most people don’t engage with things they see or the people around them.