Keeping your cool while dating

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In this video, I discuss how to keep your cool in the early stages of dating if you're someone who tends to get clingy and/or overly attached.

Intro music: Smooth and Cool by Nico Staf
Outro music: Lensko Let’s Go

Time Stamps:
0:00 Intro
0:34 Determine your boundaries ahead of time
2:10 Think strategically, not just emotionally
5:26 For jealousy, do the Opposite Action
7:35 Practice delayed gratification

[haki]

Step 1: Have a date. ( Its been 29 years... )

[monsieurfreerealestate]

Do you have any videos on how to chill out and stop being clingy when you're in a committed and long term relationship? I wasn't clingy in the beginning but now that things have settled in and are reliable and stable I can't stop feeling like my partner will just abruptly lose interest in me and end things even though there are no objective tells that this is something that will happen. I'm not used to a relationship this un-chaotic. I over-analyze everything and the anxiety over them losing interest and their love for me and I don't know how to stop.

[Paxility]

Nice to hear I already apply all of this advice.

It's important to remember that even if you apply it, it may still be difficult. It's just healthier.

I had someone get mad at me because I told them I am not interested in anything outside of friendship because they stood me up and that killed my attraction.

I broke up with someone recently because they clearly didn’t have the time to make the relationship more serious. And it really hurts. Even though I know it's the sensible thing to do.

[kenetik]

Paradoxically, the way I can keep my cool is by talking to multiple ppl at the same time

[srcarroll]

Babe this vid is two weeks too late he already left but don't worry I'm using this for next time

[adrianvasquez]

I want to see the other side of this, how to "warm up". I have no clue how to advance things when I talk to a romantic interest.

[fungouslobster]

i just gaslight myself into saying im not jealous or insecure and eventually it worked, just dont send that text but acknowledge your insecurity regardless, over time you will notice that you start to lose those feelings altogether

[Moshmn]

Take a lesson from Mr. Freeze: "Chill."

[allaboardthegravytrain]

I was watching this last night and it helped me a lot more than the other advice given out online. I didn’t realize how bad it was to show jealousy. I thought sometimes it’s excusable, cause I don’t judge jealousy that much (cause it’s normal for me) but it’s not normal to some people. What also helps is that I imagine in my head how I’m being perceived. But sometimes when I feel really triggered it’s so freaking hard. It’s almost like my partner is taunting me, and this happens with different partners over the years. Like Ana said sometimes this excited them and makes them prod me more to see my reaction. I find that cruel and irritating cause I won’t do that to them.

[m.g.]

I’ve gotten jealous in a previous relationship, but when I tried to ignore it and not talk about my jealousy, I started to feel a lot of anger and resentment for my partner doing things with this other person even though they weren’t romantic things (they had projects to do together). What could I have done to not feel that anger and resentment towards my partner during that time? I feel like their time together and kind gestures towards each other also made me question my partner more. Has he been this friendly with other women? Or more? Can he set boundaries with them or am I going to get hurt?

[Raven_Frame]

Thanks Ana!! I really needed this advice. I'm in a talking phase with someone who is long distance from me and its been making me pretty anxious
There's a lot of predatory relationship content out there that prays on that anxiety, but your content is always well reasoned and thoughtful

[Alix_L]

I didn’t know expressing jealousy could have those effects. Thank you for this helpful video :) ❤

[janamacklin]

Wow this is good timing! I really needed this video! Thanks for a really good video!!

[Anonymous-yebg]

You always explain yourself so well, subscribed

[ShesTiredd]

7:13

Thank you! That's what I've always done since I was very young and lots of people felt I just don't care enough/ I don't love someone enough

I just let them act on it. It saved me from lots of heartbreak, truly

[MaiDongNghi]

It's crazy how nobody is talking about the forbidden ebook Magnetic Aura from Borlest

[hirafilms]

these are good Dr, i learned some of these the hard way by going through it a couple years ago. Good to know that my reflections were close to on point. Thanks for the boundaries stuff before not only in s3x but in many other aspects too. Detachment is hard but so freeing.

[christina]

Stoke the flames of the jealousy? evil!

[lasshaley]

Easier said than done. I think most of us with these patterns of behavior know that our habits are self-destructive. The advice in this video pretty much boils down to “stop and think before you act, ” which is perfectly correct and salient advice, but not particularly useful as a self-soothing strategy when those feelings are activated.

[RainingPouringSnoring]

Oh my gosh I needed this. Perfect timing! Thanks 😊