let's talk about dating culture

Peanut Chutney and Dating culture
Both very interesting topics, won’t you agree?

Quick pitch for this peanut chutney recipe: it’s DELICIOUS, nutty, spicy, and tangy.
Make it with Idli, Dosa, or vada and I promise you will love it!
Who doesn’t love peanut dips/sauces anyway?

Also, let me know in the comments if dating is accepted in you as a teenager.
I’m not sitting here and saying 14-year-olds SHOULD date :P That’s completely personal and up to them and the conversation they have with their parents. Also the dating culture.

Dating in general is not seen well among the older generation in most South Asian countries. What’s your experience been like?

#peanutchutney #indianchutney #Southindianbreakfast #idli #dosa #chutney #easychutney #easypeanutchuntey #peanut #vegan #spicychutney

[beextravegant]

Don't judge me for having watched Hannah Montana ;P

[Alishbaawan]

"My non existent teenage dating life"
I felt that
You felt that
The whole south asia felt that

[igotelf]

What dating life? It's just me and my bed all day together for 19 years now 😂

[Jarvis_Mari]

My dad (we're from the USA) was strict about dating and boys, but my mom however... My mom was my accomplice in sneaking my boyfriend in through the window (or back door) after my dad went to bed when I was sixteen so we could hang out together. My mom thought it unfair that my dad let my brothers do whatever and go wherever they wanted while I wasn't allowed to do anything apart from taking care of my younger siblings (since I was the oldest girl). So she wanted to personally help with my "rebellion", since I was the obedient child who never broke rules. Which, having been a teen girl herself before once upon a time, it made her sad that I didn't have certain freedoms that she had when she was younger.
She also approved of my boyfriend and thought he was a nice guy despite how he looked and thought that my dad's stubbornness in letting us see each other would eventually drive my boyfriend away from me and that I'd resent him for it.
A lot of people would question my mom's judgement as to why she'd help sneak in a 17 year old boy to stay the night with her 16 year old daughter, I'm sure. But since I'm still with the same guy 13 years later, I don't think she cares what anyone has to say. Especially since she calls him son now, lol. 😂

And no, there was no teen pregnancy involved to trap him or anything crazy before you ask, we still don't have kids and only will when we are ready and choose to. Just thought I'd add that bit cuz people always assume the men in these scenarios get trapped with a kid as if that's the only reason highschool sweethearts stay together. 😅

Because my mom took that step to help me, it gave me courage to stand up for myself against my dad's overbearingly strict personality and rebel a little like a normal teenager. So I got to eventually have a little bit more fun as a teenager as a result. My boyfriend's friends became my friends, I wasn't getting bullied anymore because he wouldn't stand for anyone disrespecting or hurting me, and since he was basically the leader of the alternative/goth/emo/skater kids at school, all of them had my back along with him. We had the relationship at our school that people would say "I wish I had a relationship like those two" about, and to this day we are the same way we always have been.

Just two nerdy goth kids with the same sense of humor, likes/interests and very good communication compared to other relationships I've seen. We also hardly ever fight, and NEVER yell at each other.

Even my stubborn dad likes him now because he knows I'm safe, happy, won't go hungry and knows that my bf is VERY willing and capable of physically defending me against threats if it came down to it. So I'd say it all turned out for the best in the end lol.

[Estelle]

Wait, we were supposed to be dating as teenagers??? I’ve just been vibing in aroace solitude-

[nipurnpanwar]

"If u are queer, u are screwed" - that's still a fact 😭😭😭

[siriuslyjyo]

as an Indian your description was quite spot on. Even with parents who would generally be considered liberal and are pretty free when it comes to their child making their own decisions, dating is a sour topic. I think it comes from a place of concern. but yes, as a teenager, I think Dating can go seriously wrong at a young age. it just ended up causing unnecessary trauma to some of my friends.

[angelicagtle]

"No dating while you live under my roof" but also "I want grandkids before I die so hurry up"

[sarahshake]

“and if you happen to be queer… you’re pretty much screwed.”

i took great humor in hearing that statement. as a queer woman growing up w/ an muslim-indian father in america, i was discouraged from befriending boys AND girls from other cultures. i greatly envy romance and dating culture from other cultural backgrounds because i feel as though if i’d experience even a little bit of it i’d feel less socially inept. but for now, i’ll continue to fantasize what i wish i could’ve had. :)

[ishoe]

One funny thing with Indian parents is they expect not to talk to boys in our teenage and then again in our youth they will beg us to meet matches who are stranger's 😂

[rayanura]

Dutchie here 🤗 Not really there, I spent most of teenage years spending time with friends. (I also watched a lot of non-romantic animes, so I was not really interested in boys.) Funnily enough, the first date I ever had turned into a relationship and an engagement. Even funnier, my fiancée is Indian. 😅 We also had to hide our relationship for two years from his parents. Not only because of the dating part but also because I am white 😂. But luckily his parents have accepted me now and are always happy when they see me ❤

[nikaswords]

I'm from northern germany...parents usually want you to become independent / your own person and make your own decisions early on. While the parents who can afford it will still support you financially well into your 20s, they want you to move out at 18, right after finishing school to move to another city for university. This is so you can become your own person, make your own decisions, have new experiences, learn how to keep a home and handle your money. Of course, dating is also an aspect in this freedom. Even in school, parents allow us to have relationships...but you have to somewhat formally meet your partner's parents before staying over a lot. In the case of my family, there was always an awkward dinner for these occasions. I'll admit germans are reserved and a bit awkward when it comes to these topics nevertheless...but they'll support their kids finding their own way. And my parents would never intervene in my brothers or my dating life unless they had serious concerns. I'm actually happy about that. I only feel comfortable talking about details with my friends anyway, and them not questioning us kids' decisions shows a high level of trust.
Also I want to stress that there's no difference in expectation for sons and daughters when it comes to this. That's where I feel real equality when I look at other cultures...except for stupid and immature teenagers, nobody would ever slut shame, catcall or something like that.

[SallyChun]

I am Thai here. Actually my house is pretty chill about dating as long as I keep up with all my studies and do well in school (in which I do) but I have never dated anyone in my teens because I prioritise studies and career over boys. My family used to joke with me for being single all those time and maybe not getting marry at all. I date with my bf when I started working and funny enough he is an Indian person. My parents were skeptic at first but they were cool with it. His family seemed to be cool with us dating too so I guess it varies from family to family. 😅

[abcdefghi]

I live in India, never had any boyfriends in school life . My parents were always chill with me having guy friends but had told me not to waste my teenage life having relationship with boys and instead studying or practicing my hobbies which I didn't understand back then. However after seeing my friends having fucked up relationships and constantly thinking of boys instead of themselves made me realise how wonderful advise it was. I really enjoyed my school life with many wonderful friends and still cherish those memories.❤

[fathomD]

I was a virgin till 28 years old. Married now finally 💀💀💀 #asian parents

[LDawg_]

For me as a white American I chose not to go down the complicated dating route and I’ll deal with that when I’m older. Sometimes I do think I’m missing out but i just look at my siblings and all the complications they had and chose not to deal with it.

[anwesha]

I once watched Hannah Montana kiss a boy and my mother got so upset, she shouted and shut off the tv 😂😂

[ramya]

I was raised by Indian parents but they were so chill and wouldn't mind if i was talking to any other boy unless i spend a lot of time chatting with them. I even share small things with them Its so nice

[imastarrrrrrr]

Honestly, in Mississippi, our parents just ask about their future occupations or current. They also ask what your favorite truck is and what your favorite singer is. They won't ask who your parents are because literally everyone knows everyone 😭🤣

[Riya_sinha]

I just got over my last teen year . I am into my early 20s .Now I understand why do our parents try to refrain us from getting into relationships . Not every relationship you're gonna get into is going to bring you peace & happiness .Most of the relationships end leaving scars on people .Our parents just want to safeguard our tender heart .They don't want to keep us caged.They don't want to us to have non- social life .They want best for us & they have gone through these relationships stuffs in theirs days . They know it consists of suffering .They just don't want us to suffer .