Therapist Breaks Down Love is Blind 3 - SK & Raven - Did I See It Coming?

What's Anya Screen, Friends?
Today, I'm breaking down everything that we saw unfold between SK & Raven on-screen. It's so hard to make sense of what we witnessed versus the allegations that have been coming out. Did you see it coming? Let's discuss.

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[rielhawkrht]

Raven was the only woman who didn't try to manipulate her partner. I liked how awkward she was around him despite looking like a goddess haha

[matariki]

Apart from the whole "you should pay my bill" scene, Raven had the biggest redemption era I've seen in TV in a long time.
I loved how her whole "I'm a good-looking working out girl" persona was actually a façade, loved how she turned down Bartise and how vulnerable she slowly became with SK, how hard it seemed for her to be open and communicate but she put through the work and she compromised so much for the wedding...

She looked so vain at first but then you realize she was the most classy of all of them, like when she turned down Bartise in such an elegant way, even when SK dumped her at the altar she remained so classy and sweet with his mom...Some people said that Cole was the golden retriever of the season, to me Raven was the cat : seemingly vain and distant with her walls up but at the end so caring and sweet. Loved loved loved her.

[FariaMarjaani]

I find it strange that everyone focuses so much on how welcoming SK's mom was in their first interaction and at the wedding, but barely even comment on the scene when they were buying the headdress and his mom laid out all the expectations she had of Raven in this marriage. Raven clearly was not ok with those expectations and said that out loud multiple times, and yet no one really talks about that. In my experience coming from a traditional immigrant community, it's not the love that the mother-in-law shows in the beginning that matters. It's the expectations she has of her daughter-in-law, and whether the daughter-in-law can meet them. That is the basis of the relationship. The love is conditional on the daughter-in-law filling the role of serving her son. And if she cannot meet those expectations, that same love will no longer be received. That love is a transaction, and therefore niceness/open arms early on isn't extremely meaningful, when it hasn't been tested. Even if the daughter-in-law can meet the expectations, she's only getting the mother-in-law's love because she's taking care of her son. There is no love there that's independent of the son. And to me that brings up the question of how real that relationship even is. This is a really important aspect of the show that I haven't seen anyone touch on.

[Bones]

The pool scene when Raven said she's not interested in a superficial romance was the turning point for me

[LoveBug]

I personally never saw the romantic spark between them. There always seemed to be this weird/ awkward tension and disconnect. Although they would have deep conversations, I never sensed a comfortability between two ppl about to get married. The only time I could possibly see any romantic connection was during the wedding episode. It was more like they were good friends trying to see if there was a possibility of a romantic relationship.

[teamlovepanda]

I literally went Trya Banks on him..."I was rooting for you! We were all rooting for you!!" 🤣

[tamtai]

I started doubting S.Ks intention the moment he said 'no' to Raven. Before hand he had not really expressed any doubts about their relationship so something went off for me when he said no. I know from experience that children who come from polygamous homes (no matter how difficult it was) find it difficult to be monogamous...its just how it is..

[the.magic.catbus]

When SK started bringing up concerns about her family… I saw that as his way out of marrying her. I personally related to Raven a lot. I am mixed, have a small disconnected often toxic family, I have a chosen family with friends, and I love to work out. I also can’t sit still for very long and have to move around during work meetings and long conversations. I was so sad and personally triggered myself when the blame was on her for her family’s actions. When you don’t have a close biological family it’s good to find a partner who is understanding.

[kelly]

I disagree that SK was simply asking Raven whether anyone from her family was coming to the wedding. He said it was a “problem” that his mom had. She seemed triggered not because he was asking questions, but because her family’s lack of interest in her important moments is very hurtful to her and it was now being taken as a negative about her by his family who she so desperately wants to impress, even though she had no control over her family’s decisions.

[karitak]

Although I loved how non-problematic their relationship was, he seemed to always say the right thing during the relationship, which was a bit of a red flag.

[agrantverde]

Truly about her working out, maybe she just really enjoys working out. That's a thing too. A genuine one for many.

[kverbrugge]

I never felt like there was a true connection between them. It always felt a bit removed and guarded. While I'm surprised it ended the way it did, I was expecting them to separate

[jessimichelle]

So… apparently he was in a relationship prior to Love is Blind and had been continuing to date this person while still with Raven after he said no to her at the altar. The whole time he was with another girl, taking her on vacations etc

[AfroTae]

I honestly think people judged raven too harsh. I’m neurodivergent and see a lot of my self in her. People thinking we are stuck up and bougie but we’re just awkward and don’t know what to do with ourselves. Going to what we know what familiar with (her Pilates) her rigidness in change and what she wants/likes. Not really letting in at first having a emotional barrier up 😅. I’m not 100% sure but she opened up a bit more on tik tok. And I can really see it looking back.

[sweedy]

I found her YouTube by accident and her videos are actually solid 😂

[luanapires]

Hey Steph!
I'm a psychology student from Brazil and I've been watching your videos for a while and I really love them!
I don't know if you feel comfortable doing a review of other countries' "Love is Blind", but Brazil's just released it's second season and it would be amazing if you checked it out!
I'd love to hear your opinion in the relationships – especially one on the first season which includes a psychologist! I feel like people expect psychologists to be perfect all the time and not at all like regular people. So, it would be amazing if you could comment on it!
Please keep up the amazing work you've been doing! ❤

[Libra_One]

Coming from a Nigerian background (lol) I was always suspicious of SK. I did think he was going to say "yes", and was a bit surprised when he said "no". Although, the cheating allegations that came out....I was not surprised. It's a shame.

[angelafranklin]

I really never understood what was it about SK that Raven liked so much. He didn't seem interesting to me at all, lol. I think Raven has a huge heart which is probably broken, hopefully not, but even if it is, I hope she knows that one eventually gets over it and feeling heartbroken won't last a lifetime. I hope she finds someone who really appreciates her truly and fully, she deserves it. 💞

[monitawhite]

I love how Steph acknowledged how difficult it is for parents in law to suddenly have to step back and allow their children’s partners to fill a role that they once held. Not excusing the mistreatment of your child’s partner but that experience of ‘letting go’ as a parent is life changing and difficult and I feel like a lot of people don’t acknowledge that or think about what the parents might be going through

[Stormy]

After seeing Raven interviewed on Nick Viall's show, I believe it was a real relationship, at least for her. She talked about the challenges they had as a couple, some of focused around them sharing space, and I just can't see her being able to fabricate those details. Maybe he had ulterior motives, or maybe there was a layer to the relationship where they both did, but I don't think it was a publicity stunt.

After hearing Steph's take on Raven's bond with SK's mom/family, I also wonder how much of a motivator that was for her to fight to work it out. It seems like the family filled an emotional need that maybe she didn't even realize she had.

It is sad that it didn't work out, for all the reasons mentioned in the video. I really liked Raven's story arc. She won me over.