Why You Have That Little, Lying Voice in Your Head

If you feel something inside you say, “I really don’t think you’re strong enough,” you don’t necessarily have to trust that little voice—it might not know you as well as you think it does.

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[susanne]

(Depression.) I have a postcard beside my bed that says: "Don't believe everything you think!" - That has actually even helped sometimes. At least it makes me smile ...

[BriefBrainSnacks]

Clearly, early engagement in postiive child development, and reinforcing realistic perspectives of the self is very important.

[IceMetalPunk]

As someone who suffers from an anxiety/depressive disorder, this video touches on one of the most important (and terrifying) aspects of my experience with it: the seeming lack of evidence that anything is good about me. Don't get me wrong, I know *intellectually* that there are things I'm good at, things that are good about me. But when that little voice in my head decides today's one of those days where it's going to remind me how awful and inadequate I am, it's *so hard* not to listen. I consider myself very scientific-minded, and so in general I tend to align my beliefs with the evidence. But that's the thing: when it comes to beliefs about myself, I often don't know what evidence is real and what evidence isn't. For instance, if I'm sitting there remembering all the ways I've screwed up, and I'm having trouble remembering many times I've succeeded, how do I know I'm not a screw-up? The evidence isn't presented to me; in a way, my brain hides the evidence from me. On at least one occasion, I had a pretty bad episode, and I was curled up in a ball barely holding back tears because *all I could think about* was how much of a terrible friend I am and all the reasons my friends should leave me. My best friend (who I couldn't possibly appreciate enough) had to sit there and type out a several-page text to me explaining all the things I've done for her, all the ways I've helped, all the reasons she really does care and that I'm not actually awful. Only then was I able to get a moment of clarity (and relief). My brain couldn't see the evidence, so she had to spell it out for me.

Yes, it's awful living like this, especially when (like me) inadequacy is a major trigger. Because then you get into that "anxiety about anxiety" loop where the more anxious you feel about being inadequate, the more inadequate you feel for being anxious. Maybe one day I'll figure out how to actually like myself; I can't remember the last time I did.

[brittanygidonable]

Unfortunately, knowing that it is lying doesn't actually take away its power.

[nicolaiveliki]

I think I have a healthy self image, but when someone compliments me, my mind automatically jumps to 'they're trying to manipulate you', because yes, this has happened a lot.

[FuzzyTrekkie]

As someone who has had regular depressive episodes for over a decade, the reason why I tend to lean more towards people who say negative things about me is because when I'm having an episode and someone says something nice to me, I honestly think that their lying. I view the world in a darker light during depression. So when some says something dark about me, I view it as true.

[DramaticFlora]

now I've always been a bit curious about "the voice inside your head" because I've never had what I others described as a voice telling me things, I've just had basically me just talking to myself but without speaking and I can swap between the two as if there was no difference what so ever

[miumiumanzo]

I sometimes coin this “gaslighting myself”

[aceofacez]

With OCD, oftentimes your inner voice is just an endless stream of doubts, fear, and panic.

[EmonyLP]

A few negative interactions to get it in, years of CBT to get it back out again. :P

[CheesyFries]

I have depression and anxiety, and my little voice (despite good people in my life who tells me I'm loved and good things) tells me I'm such a terrible person. And with the teeniest of mess ups, I'm distraught and I honestly just loathe me. It's so hard sometimes to find good things about me. I regret moments and events and I feel worse. Therapy costs too much and I don't have the time.
I wish my mom was here to help me.

[bugjams]

I kinda always assumed I was depressed because people said negative things, I never realized I was subtly pushing people to say negative things about me BECAUSE I had depression. Wow.

[Luna_Christine]

For years, I believed what others told me about who I am.
For years I suppressed the voice telling me the beautiful woman I really am.
For years, I believed that I was meant to do what my parents wanted, get married to a beautiful woman, become a father, be the “handsome son” they wanted me to be.
It was so powerful, that as soon as I started to let her(the true me) start to have a bigger voice in my head, it nearly killed me. I was feeling so awful about her, that I had resolved to take my own life, because I felt death was more preferable than being me. After my attempt, I began to listen to her more and more, only to have her come to the forefront about a month later. I’ve been her since then, and I am much happier and healthier than ever.

[Obeken]

"It's like I'm paranoid looking over my back
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin"

RIP Chester Bennington

[AliceSylph]

Now imagine having a fractured mind so you can't be sure if that voice is yours or another's trying to influence you. It's very difficult to understand these things when you have not known anything different.
I'm glad people are investing in this. Brains misbehaving can literally ruin someone's life and end it. Thanks for these videos, to me and an alter of mine, we can better adapt and recognise our symptoms through learning :)

[drizzlingrose]

0:51 thats how bullys work, saying you are worthless for 6 years untill you belive them, even well into adult hood, and even when people you love and know loves you back say other wise, you still dont believe them.
oof, thats how i feel, and even being aware of it dosent help that much D:

[emedicao]

The Voice in my head is this guy who doesn't really like me, but literally can't live without me, so he makes hell outta my life, basically

[ktvx.]

After over two decades I finally fixed this. The voice that used to torment me now helps, I see myself better and I get more positive feedback that fuels it more

[Bellencer]

Why do people like me have their “internal monologue” voices take the form of multiple different voices, or even appear to come from outside our heads, yet don’t have psychosis or any other form of mental illness and lead otherwise entirely normal lives? My experiences and those of others have left most psychologists and psychiatrists scratching their heads trying to understand this phenomenon.

[nixxbi]

I wonder how people with depression lose their pleasure on previously liked activities, and how do we rediscover what we like. Is it biochemical? Is cell communication involved? Is it more environment and training or what?