How to build instant rapport with strangers

If you struggle to connect with people, it's highly likely that you haven't learnt the skill of building rapport.

I've learnt to build rapport fast with strangers by matching and mirroring their energy, more specifically their body language and vocal foundations.

If someone is quiet, I adjust myself to be quieter. And if someone is extremely excited, then I also adjust myself. By meeting them where they are, you establish rapport instantly, and then from there you can take them where you want to go with your energy.

[dulapiip]

I'm alright at conversations but always struggle with keeping my tone in check at the back of my mind which takes my focus away from the actual ideas in the conversion, so this helps. You keep consistently posting genuinely the most practical, easy-to-do and objective pieces of speech advice I've ever seen from a public speaker. Thanks man.

[RunNoodles]

I was given the advice to respond one level above where the person, because they will match my energy most of the time

[johnpeters]

the problem comes when you treat everyone differently and they see you doing it and feel like you lied to them.

[chineduawduche]

Everytime I watch Vinh video I will learn new thing in communication.

[bluetiger]

Me matching the mentally ill people's energy and becoming mentally ill myself lol

[shaquillesmith]

You are one of the best communication coaches ever❤🎉Been following you for the past 3 years

[simplypawly]

I was having this exact conversation with my partner today saying how I m embarrassed reflecting back on the trip to the hairdressers yesterday. I m a bubbly (not overly usually) person and I consider myself to speak “normally” as a millennial/ borderline Gen Z (can’t usually relate though). But my hairdresser is your stereotypical Gen Z person who say things like “OMG GURL!” and uses a lot of “like..”, “literally”, “omg isn’t it just!”. She is lovely BTW.
And as my appointment went on, I find myself responding to her in a similar manner which is just not me! And I realized I was mimicking her, I think I was doing it because I want to make her comfortable with me and give me a good haircut maybe?😅 I don’t know if that was definitely my motivation but something in my brain was making me do that lol. I had a good time anyway but I walked out and I feel “icky” about myself 😂😂😂

[RS-fzps]

This works amazingly for persuasive speech.

[hilaryyaneztito]

Vinh- thank you because your videos are always so real and super helpful👌🏻

[ErikWilliams]

This is Andy Bernard’s way of winning over strangers!

[ber]

Imagine two people meeting for the first time and they're both trying to match their energy

[rosemarietolentino]

I match their energy when I am sparing in the ring as well.

[Zsac]

When the blonde asian dude gives a masterclass in nlp in a minute… thank you Vinh

[QueenOfHillCountry]

In partner dancing- we do the same- match people where they are. Life is a DANCE!

[Spiritual-Entrepreneur]

This is the classic method in NLP called mirroring

[mayraamato]

I always do that naturally. People need to be met where they are.

[Marcitelith]

I agree and love this, I do have a question though. Why is it mine, yours or anybody’s responsibility to meet others at their level. That takes energy from me, when everyone should understand deeply who they are and understand that not anyone is the same.

[rjba]

What do you do when they are using the same technique? Funny but serious question!

[benjiusofficial]

I do this with other people

but I have *never* had someone do this with me. I perpetually run at 11 and many people seem to find it tiring.

[glenncross]

Here's something else: Be genuine.