Moist Meter: The Emoji Movie

The Emoji Movie (2017 Science Fiction / Adventure Film), starring TJ Miller, James Corden and directed by Tony Leondis , as reviewed by Charlie and Jackson.

The Moist Meter is an experimental measurement system that you can use to safely gauge just how moist a video game or movie is going to be before playing it or viewing it. Avoid the dry products and only use the wettest.

Moist Meter Scientists:

[disgal]

Even a funeral is more entertaining than this movie, it has fun in the name after all

[Theshabadaman]

He really didn't want to do this one

[alienelephant]

My pants were dry as sahara while watching the movie. Wise decision penguinz0 -_-

[bananamcstuffins]

Can't wait for the fidget spinner movie

[wat]

Some things will get you a lot of views on YouTube like:

-Combining fruit and pens together
-Korean people doing crazy dances
-Penguinz0 with a tone or emotion besides neutral.

[bootbro]

Wait wait wait...did u see this movie at cinemark theaters? Because yesterday i was with a group of six guys and 4 of us said fuck this at the dance number and left.

[CHouse_]

They replaced Popeye the sailor man with Emoji Movie...wtf

[Mustafa-qlte]

The fact that Charlie had to watch the entirety of this movie for the review makes me laugh uncontrollably

[Camad]

It is the most boring, inoffensive by the numbers piece of trash. It's bad not because it's bad it's bad because you feel *n o t h i n g* while watching it.

[gambledork]

My sister begged for us to go to this instead of SPIDER MAN HOMECOMING and I was so pissed when we actually fucking went

[Buhbuhfuzz]

"I can assure you kids will love it" I heard kids asked their parents to leave during the movie

[Gizmomaster]

It's not that the movie is the worst movie ever made, it's as one critic put it, you leave the theatre a colder person.
It's not just simply a boring or stupid bad movie, no... you start to resent the movie as it progresses and by the time it's over you feel anger towards not just the movie but yourself.
A dark and foreboding movie that forces the viewer to ask the question "Why am I here?" Then it spits in your face and laughs maniacally, yelling at you "WHY ARE YOU HERE!"

[servicebroke]

I swear, the kids in my theater were still and silent through the entire movie.

[scraps]

Fun fact: they made this pile of shit instead of a popeye movie

[Andysgal]

You just can’t comprehend the emoji movie when they make a poop joke that poop joke is a political statement when the poop character doesn’t wash his hands that is a message about global warming when they dance they dance because they have a deep connection to barrack Obama in fact in the after credits scene Obama gives every character an N word pass and it is very emotional

[maxwllcool]

Yay I guessed disgust. I'm a good boy

[meyerpictures]

You've raised a good point. Don't see movies that you know you're going to hate, that you know are going to be bad. Then they just make more of them. Even if you're a YouTube reviewer, because there are tons of them.

[PunpunIsNoFunfun-alt]

The emoji movie makes me really want to check out the just dance app now free on android and mobile

[rydercollins]

I watched it and there were kids standing up and dancing every time a song came on

[sagafor]

This movie was so dry, that since my girlfriend watched it, she can´t get wet. I mean nothing works, help me pls. She usually gets soaking when I put on my Thomas the tank engine socks and hum the sonic theme song, but nothing is happening now. I even showed her the video where you can see Charlie´s face, the world record one, and she´s still dryer than sand (believe me, I know how dry sand is when you put your pee-pee in it). How can a movie be so dry, that even Crit1kal´s magnificent face doesn´t get a woman wet.