Married To A Controlling Husband - What To Do Next

If you have a dominating and controlling husband, and you're trying to find your independence and to feel valued for who you are as a person, then this video is for you.

If you're looking for a video about how to control your husband, we're not talking about that here.

Control never works and will destroy your relationship.

First, for those women looking for how to define boundaries, speak up for themselves, and feel like an equal in their relationship, that's precisely what this video can help you with.

We cannot solve it in just a video, but I can tell you things that you can begin doing right now.

We at Marriage Helper have worked with thousands of relationships that have been affected by a controlling husband.

We want to help you as well.

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[louisaklimentos]

Feeling trapped is definately the word .

[jacquiventurini]

So many examples you mentioned here are abuse. These things can become extremely damaging to self esteem.

[dorkusamericanus]

Ok so then what’s your advice for when he freaks out and there’s a huge fight and things get so much worse after you say no? Have you ever said no and said “I’m gonna do whatever I want” to someone super controlling? It’s not like they say “Oh, ok. Cool!” And then everything goes smoothly after that. They get super upset and angry and threatening. They may not get physically threatening, but they threaten in other ways. They use anger, intimidation, and gaslighting. Even if they are fundamentally “good people, ” they do these things

[highpowerincontrol]

Sadly all the advice given in this video wouldnt work for me because in his eyes hes never wrong

[merilopez]

I know that my husband has issues from his parents divorce, and substance abuse took his mother's life, and recognized his father's bad behavior. He has mimic his father's behavior by talking down to me, constant control on my move, and making sure I know that he is the main provider and is saving for me after his death.

[lissahammonds]

He is a good person….and he is so stuck in his up bringing and parents divorced in early adulthood. He can’t see the problems.

[marjorieapicelli]

Perfect description of how I lived for 35 MISERABLE years!

[jenbatlak]

Controlling can be a very dangeroeuss thing, it can lead to seriouess mental illness.Some of these things are a bit similar in my situation.I am not the same person as I was before after I married him(mine).

[BJJ_Richie]

Bravo ! I was a controlling husband for 21 years ! Until God put me in the exact position my wife would complain to me about how she needed people, interaction etc etc, well I have had a huge humbling with this, and it took this to get my attention, it overwhelmed me with guilt so bad, and mentally that I’m on antidepressants now to just realize my marriage is not over and I didn’t destroy it completely, because my wonderful wife is STILL with me, I can’t tell you how this has and is still a transition for me, meds and therapy for the damage I’ve done, and how it was conditioned to me from my childhood, heed my words 🙏🙏

[jenniferannfox]

they know exactly what they are doing. If they didn't then they wouldn't be able to refrain around other people and only target the spouse. They suddenly are not controlling when a divorce is filed and they have understood they can't manipulate people. They ask for forgiveness. So yes, they know exactly what they are doing and what their intention is. They know how to use subtle control as well. For example, never repair the house or let the lawn grown up knee high in weeds and bushes around the house. That's one way to keep friends away and keep the spouse isolated. They forced their spouses to pay for their own food on little money. The list goes on and on.

[ivahelf]

I can not point to the exact time when it all changed but my husband turned into someone I did not recognized after 35 yrs of marriage & not getting his way on everything he accused me of being controlling, when he had control of finances, telling me that he was the one paying the bills; ...etc. Tried & succeded on putting my Alzheimer's mother in a home, told me exactly how the Divorce was going to go & stood his ground on no Alimony. After he got all he wanted tried to verbally mistreat me & I had enough!!!!

[bethmyles-geddes]

Maybe my husband is a ‘great guy’ but has chosen to control my basic freedoms because say his father abandoned his mum when he was small and does not attempt to change after decades, this is horrendous behaviour and if his spouse for years directly asks him to change because his actions are causing her suffering -this is a bad person

[adrianeelise]

Please pray for me. My spouse is very controlling he won’t let me make any friends I’m not allowed to speak to my mother and my sister were really my brother I’m not allowed to ever get together with anyone or make new friends or talk with old friends. He finds a problem with everyone. The only place I’m allowed to go is grocery shopping pretty much that’s the only place he lets me go by myself and that’s because it puts food on the table for him. I’m not allowed to have conversations with anyone that’s OK with him otherwise he freaks out. He says I love them more than him and if I loved him I wouldn’t need any friends or anyone else in my life.

[robertfisher]

No one needs to be controlling over the other person .if your in a relationship its meant to be equal .no man or woman should be telling the other person what they can and can't do .its a relationship so you sit down best you can be honest and try and resolve the issues in hand .I know its always easier then said unfortunately some people won't listen or not prepared to talk or just ignore whats going on between them .men and women have equal rights don't let your partners control you .its a receipy for disaster if it can't be sorted .

[emilyearl]

My husband literally said to me “I feel you need me in your life” as if I couldn’t function in life without him.

Is this demeaning or is this some type of manipulative control?

[nicoleharris]

My husband and I Ordered the PIES the other night. We wish we could do the save my marriage course now. But we will have to save up 😔. It’s hard when you have two kiddos to worry about. But that’s the whole reason we are working so hard to find a way to put our marriage back together!! We have two great kids who deserve both of us happy and healthy 💗

[taciasoares]

I really hope you have more of these controlling videos! My husband and I both really guilty of controlling each other. I would be very interested to hear how to recognize your own controlling behavior. I find it hard to separate am I being controlling or am I rebelling against being controlled?

[dorkusamericanus]

Understanding what leads to these behaviors doesn’t help. He may have good intentions. But it’s not going to help. His mother was very controlling and an alcoholic. I can’t be with him anymore, and while I’ll miss him, I don’t have any other choice. I can understand where he’s coming from all day and how he got this way. But it doesn’t help. He doesn’t give me access to our finances and that’s that. I have zero ability to do anything and that’s that. The end. He also won’t let me drink. He flips out and leaves and threatens to leave. And I have zero friends. And that’s that. So it’s easy to say just say no, that’s not how it works. I know I have a right to do what I want, but it’s not how it works.

[glenysshelton]

Being assertive starts at the beginning when you meet….you dont then control takes over years go by then you start being assertive then it gets dangerous stepoing out of being a doormat changes everything be aware and careful ive seen it soo many times