How To Shut Down A Narcissist’s Griping

Dr. Les Carter is a best selling author and therapist who has semi-retired to Waco, TX. For 40+ years he maintained a counseling practice in Dallas, conducting more than 65,000 therapy sessions and many workshops and seminars. He specializes in anger management and narcissistic personality disorder. Since creating his YouTube channel, his videos have received more than 115 million views.

📣 Dr. Carter's new course, Anger Games, is live! 📣

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[BaraSchmidt]

"When they gripe at you..." So, 99% of the time! Exhausting! They don't deserve your response, but when one is given, make sure it reflects your position. Not theirs! Stay Healthy!

[ceraroberts]

My boss was going on about women one day and I had already had a gut full. I looked at him square in the eye, and in front of an audience and told him when guys complain this much their estrogen is high and they are looking for a dopamine hit. He went red and stopped talking to me. It was the best week of work I had up to that point.

[breakthroughmoment]

It takes mental discipline to be brief and succinct. Often we feel we have to give long, flowery responses to our tormentors, but less is more! Yes, to calm confidence!! Thank you, Dr. C.

[nomansland]

If you have boundaries and push back against bad behavior, don’t let them tell you that you’re the narcissist.

[jane__]

Note to self: Keep your composure, be calm, state your position. Move on. Thank you for this simple wisdom, Dr C!

[anshikasrivastava]

They will listen or rather tolerate you only when you are the only source they have for their needs or for their motives. That's it.

[dianearena]

I love this. Every time I listen to you i learn more about how to stay calm & answer calmly, while staying true to myself. You have taught me so much. I appreciate you & your advice.

[amandaliverpool]

I had this exact experience today. I said to my son, 'You can continue with your behaviour. However, the consequences will
I managed to stay calm AND confident 👍
I'm so grateful for the knowledge I have gained here 🙏

[neesiecarman]

My ex, an N, always said that I had a 'poker face '. It took a while for me to understand that I needed to take that as a compliment.

[queenjjking]

Or just walk away and ignore. It works.

[jasonsneeden]

It works so perfectly. They actually leave and start calling you names. When the narc starts calling me names i know theyre out of material. Its kinda sad really once they begin to self sabotage. Even then, its very difficult to acknowledge that they do have the choice to make, especially when its someone yoh love, i love. Uggh.

[caroleminke]

Calm confidence & no response works! Thanx to Dr C ♥️ I’m now narc free & healing myself after a lifetime of pain

[paulbarker]

The key comment you made is “I’m comfortable w/ that”. Once, I shut down my primary mNPD enemy w/ this, proving that making me uncomfortable was his reason d’être. Fool faded away. Love your succinct shorts.

[stanleydrive]

Oh Dear Doc, it's like you knew my mom! Thank you so very much!!!!

[kkvcckt]

I'm just trying to survive, and I am not a narcissist.

[PixieCropCircleDuster]

It's amazing how easy it is to flip that script even when they have you on the ground with their boot in your neck, you realize why they have to dominate, because they're so insecure, afraid & weak. Thanks Dr. Carter. (Don't concede boundaries kids)!

[marilynschmidt]

Me: Yes we think very differently. Are you finished now?

[jamieswithenbank]

They are going to gripe and they are going to complain - more so when they can't control you or manipulate you - but sometimes you just have to let go, and don't let them control you.

[qvnwdqf]

Brilliant approach dr Carter. I understand, you and I think differently, I am comfortable with my decision, nonetheless I am satisfied with what I have decided and I trust myself. Calm confidence is key to success when dealing with the narcissist.

[MsDanyelleM]

My "calm confidence" 100% of the time caused my now ex to have actual temper tantrums. Screaming, cussing, stomping, slamming doors tantrums!