What I Wish I Knew Before DATING A GERMAN

My German husband and I have been together for almost 9 years now! So as an American, here are a few things I wish I had known about Germany and Germans in general before I started dating a German.

So my question for you is: What is your take on these things? And what’s been your experience with this in your own life?

Thanks so much for watching!! Subscribe for more videos about the German and American culture, life in Germany versus life in USA, travel, and languages! New videos every Sunday and most Wednesdays :)

[Mrkankan]

As a german, i guess it would take your boyfriend 2 minutes max to say everything you said here in 7:30 minutes :D

[Seegalgalguntijak]

This over-exaggeration of emotions is also part of the reason why Americans are often being perceived as phony or superficial (also speaking generally).

[ZoggFromBetelgeuse]

German awe scale:
American awe scale: but..."

[Lu-lhfi]

I'm german and
the biggest compliment i can get from my brother is

Not bad
.-.

[johannagrau]

I'm German and I actually learned in school to give positive criticism first before giving negative :D

[jwt]

I am an Americanand have been living in Germany for about 17 years now. In Germany you arent going to get a lot of small talk at the cash-register in the supermarket, your waiter/waitress is probably not going to entertain you, and if you delay for even a second after the stoplight turns green someones gonna start laying on the horn behind you.

Many (but most certainly not all) Germans love Americans but I have to agree that they often distrust the way Americans are overly polite, beat around the bush before getting to the point, and sugarcoat bad news. It makes them immediately think you want something from them.

Still, they aren't gonna rip a kid apart for a bad book report in school... there is clearly a difference between slamming a kids homework and how adults communicate. They just discard a lot of the bullshit and get to the point. There is a saying here "Saying nothing is compliment enough" - if you have done something wrong they are going to tell it like it is...otherwise, they are going to probably leave your good work uncommented and move on :).

I used to work for a German owned company in the States. When the Germans would come visit they were totally frustrated by days filled with meetings where the first 30 minutes of EVERY meeting were filled up with touchy-feely smalltalk before getting down to brass tacks....even if you JUST had a meeting with the exact same people :). Germans come to meetings, dig out their agenda and get it done.

[therodian]

How many Germans do you need to change a light bulb? Right, only one. We are efficient and have no humour!

[pottkind]

Ja für uns Deutsche ist „Da kann man nicht meckern” schon das größtmögliche Kompliment. 😅

[Lysa]

I dated a German man for a few years while he was living in my town in the US. At one point we spoke about getting married and me moving to Germany, so I took some German classes. After a year or so, I wrote a Christmas card in “German” to his parents. They sent it back with corrections😂. Thankfully I had been with him for a while and understood the cultural differences so I wasn’t offered.

[zanelefaultiervamp]

Ich kann mir deine Dates mit Mr. German Man bildlich vorstellen. Du:"Wie geht es dir?" Er:"Muss ja." Du:"Wollen wir ins Restaurant gehen?" Er:"Hab nichts Besseres vor heute." Du: "Schmeckt es dir?" Er:"Kann man essen." Du:"Der Wein ist wirklich hervorragend!" Er:"Ist nicht schlecht." Du:"Und wie wunderschön die Atmosphäre hier ist!" Er:"Kann man aushalten." Du:"Wie findest du mein neues Kleid?" Er:"Es hat an der Stelle dort einen Verarbeitungsfehler." Du:"Gefällt es dir nicht?" Er:"Doch, es ist nicht hässlich." Du:"Der Abend mit dir war außergewöhnlich romantisch." Er:" Ja, ich hab nicht's zu meckern." Du:"Aber es tut mir furchtbar leid, dass ich Rotwein auf deinem weißen Hemd vergossen habe." Er:"Macht nichts, ist versichert." 😂

[marcusb]

first thing a German does before driving someone else's car: ask if insurance also applies to them

[JenAvaShei]

I've been taught that everything anyone says before 'aber / but' can not be taken seriously.

[Rhapsody_Sky]

you forgot to mention the german reaction to a broken glass, car incident and the world burning: tja

[flugente]

Iam from Germany O.o I don't know anybody who talks hours about insurance

[mordantvistas]

As an American we are culturally hyperbolic. My Grandparents were German. I know the contrast. My very "direct" Opa threw me off a boat and into a lake while fishing BECAUSE I did not know how to swim. After thrashing and gasping and finding my way back to the boat (essentially a self rescue), he declared in that unenthusiastic direct Germaness, "Good, now you know how to swim." But now that I think about it, he did lose an eye, had a piece of mortar shrapnel in his leg, and lost a few toes escaping from a German POW camp, so maybe he was just cranky. Good times.

[sallygernar]

Insurance is one of the most important issues that keep me from ever moving to the us

[lifeofjoyandcreation]

It is the German precision. We say it like it is. We don`t overexaggerate or don`t act. If we want to act, we go to a theatre or something. This is just how it is.

[otisobl]

Most important difference: Germans deliver messages efficiently, rather than stretching 3 trivialities out over 7:36 minutes when they can be delivered in a minute or two.

[omaransari]

As an American, I actually really hate how some people here beat around the bush and try to water down their message. I find that people who have a critique will end up bottling in their message until they feel that they are "allowed" to deliver it, generating genuine negative emotion around it (along with confusing the recipient). If people felt that they could give direct criticism, perhaps it would actually be healthier both for the giver and the receiver.

[Dosnmeda]

I also find it funny how Americans keep spamming "I'm loving it!" Just stop and think about that word! Love. No, you don't love that burger, or that app, or that TV-Series. Love means there is some kind of relationship going on. Us Germans therefore reserve such words for occasions that truly warrant it.