Why is it So Damn Hard to Ask for HELP?!

Recently I've been wondering why I have such an aversion to asking others for help-- in work, in home life, you name it. Today I discuss a bit about why this might be the case, and how important it is that, despite our reservations, we all take the risk of asking for help when we need it. Enjoy, and then go ask someone for help with something! Please! ;)

[gracemagisana]

All of your videos are so thought provoking and it's awesome. I love it.

[MiaFromTheBlock]

Go girl :) Yes, just because there is some thought that wispers in our brain, it doesnt mean that its true. We tend to believe by deafult that all our thoughts are true. Love your videos. You really are inspiring. Keep up the good work :) Greetings from sunny Europe :)

[armijojax]

I actually started a new job a week ago and it is so terrifying that I am constantly having to ask for help especially when it feels like all the other newbies are picking it up quicker than me, but I need to remind myself its an important part of learning and I need to respect the pace I need to go at in order to progress.

[Ellenwilson]

Thank you so much Nicole for making these videos! They are always so well considered, reasoned and thought provoking. Still can't believe that you haven't been offered a TEDTalk yet, it's absurd.

[IndieFanGirl]

That is so hard to ask for help/advice because it's only been a couple of years I'm actually doing what I want in life, making my OWN decisions despite what other people could say and I'm proud of that. I feel asking for help or advice would bring me back to a time where I couldn't make a decision myself... Though I do feel like a hermit sometimes because I came to a point where I just feel self-sufficient on every points in my life and I'm not sure I'm happy about it on a daily basis.

[leilalaraibish]

It's good to have you back, you were missed. Speaking of help if you ever need something translated to french or arabic, feel free to hit me up.

[xjewelsx]

The thing is, for me, a cockblock to asking for "help" is I want it in the business sense. I'm a writer. My book is mine. "Tell me what I gotta do to get it out there. NO, dont change it. NO, it doesnt sound better like THAT" and I hit a known wall. Because I KNOW that I need my work proofed, edited, viewed in an unbiased way to expose the essence and truth that will resonate with an audience, but I cant. I cant let go of the creative - the so emotionally invested, "no this is how it happened and this is how it felt" aspect of it that it professionally---and I bow my head in shame---creatively, inhibits me. My work is my baby. I know I need to let it go and get the input from the sources accessible to me but I cant yet. The workshops...the read alouds...the experience so luckily available to me, I can't take. I am not ready to let my baby go. And you, this video, just resuscitated - much needed, much appreciated - feelings. Being "creative" is so unique, personal, and revealing that "how dare it be up for change?!" makes me cringe. I know I need the help...but being ready to ask for it...moreover, willing to 'accept it'...*sigh* - you get my gears turning NP, thanks.

[Mrschapeau]

Great video ! I've let you a message, for helping On what I can observe. Continue, you really create good thing around you. : )

[nlmj]

I have a very hard time asking for help. Not only does it make me feel weak, incompetent, and idiotic (most times) I also feel like I'm being a burden to others. Like my inability to do or understand something places so much on their shoulders just to help me. And self confidence wise, I never feel like I am deserving of that. Asking for I dont think I'll ever be good at that.

[jackmewhalle]

Okay I have not listened to the video yet. But I will but you are the first woman I ever heard say it's hard to ask for help. Every female in my life I ever encountered had zero problem asking me to do some outrageous s***. But I'll give you a listen and I will keep an open mind. I'll let you know after I finish the video what I think. Anyways I know this is 4 years ago I hope you're still breathing and you have a good evening.

[somechick]

I only ask for help with small things like opening jars. I even am struggling with hospital bills because of my cancer i told you about on twitter. But even though my gf offers to help i always tell her nah because i feel uncomfortable asking for that help.

[mannysoler]

nicole if you need my help let me know