How To Overcome Psychological Barriers

We humans are extraordinarily and painfully vulnerable creatures. Especially in our early years, we are at huge danger of being psychologically damaged by those around us. Damage is in one way or another always caused by a shortfall of tenderness and care. As we might put it, it’s caused by a shortfall of love. Examples of shortfalls of love are very varied: perhaps at an early point someone went missing or someone died, someone was cruel or someone misunderstood. And as a result of this deficit, universally, some kind of wound was sustained…

FURTHER READING

“1. We humans are extraordinarily and painfully vulnerable creatures. Especially in our early years, we are at huge danger of being psychologically damaged by those around us. Damage is in one way or another always caused by a shortfall of tenderness and care. As we might put it, it’s caused by a shortfall of love.
Examples of shortfalls of love are very varied: perhaps at an early point someone went missing or someone died, someone was cruel or someone misunderstood.
And as a result of this deficit, universally, some kind of wound was sustained.

2. We are psychologically very ingenious creatures. In the face of any wound, we develop an array of very clever defence mechanisms. The purpose of defence mechanisms is to protect us against further damage, to help us to get through to the next stage of existence; to keep us going; in extremes, to save our lives…”

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CREDITS

Produced in collaboration with:

Natalkadesign

Title animation produced in collaboration with

Graeme Probert

psychology, self-improvement, self-help, emotional healing, mental health, self-awareness, personal growth, inner child healing, trauma recovery, emotional intelligence, defense mechanisms, emotional wounds, self-discovery, self-sabotage, limiting beliefs, unhealthy coping mechanisms, emotional maturity, breaking free from the past, inner peace, self-compassion, how to identify your defense mechanisms, understanding your emotional wounds, overcoming self-sabotage patterns, how to heal from childhood trauma, developing emotional intelligence, breaking free from limiting beliefs, achieving emotional maturity, letting go of the past for a better future, self-compassion for emotional healing, how to overcome psychological barriers

[rjrz]

I think School of Life should win a Nobel Prize. The content is soooo universally relatable; and I am always touched that these videos are overarchingly optimistic about each human's capacity to face their shit. In a world where our screens are constantly filled with garbage, this content is actually compassionate, thought-provoking, and useful.

[klausbutz]

Being nearly 66 now and working on this topic for quite a while i feel younger every day- its never too late 😊

[TheSonOfPlato]

I’ve been listening to the School of Life for over 10 years and never get tired of hearing Alain’s voice 😊

[maple.everything]

I appreciated the pause on the table of wounds and defense mechanisms.

[Crazysoul]

1) Grow Ambition of who want to become In future
2) Identify Defence mechanism
3) What was the purpose of any type of defence mechanism
4) why the specific defence mechanism needed and how it started
5) Feel proud that u had that defence mechanism
6) Now Assure to oneself that defence mechanism is expired
7) Figure out why it is becoming a hindrance in yourself and just get rid of it
8) now just waive it off and sail ur own ship

[Job.Well.Done_]

My psychological barrier is feeling worthless because my parents abandoned me.
At 43 I struggle with it everyday.
I frequently feel alone, Isolated, unwanted and that I have nothing to offer anyone.
-Best wishes to all who suffer I pray for you ❤

[jlnioannou]

It's really hard because after years in therapy and identifying many of my defence mechanisms - they are quite stubborn and let's just say 'putting them on a boat and waving goodbye hasn't got rid of them'. Still trying though!

[sullysullivan]

At lot of these defence mechanisms as causes apply to me.
1: mom was never there
2: dad was erratic
3:bullying siblings
I hope I learn to love people and trust them again.

[jram]

Its ok to admit and feel these pains. Be kind to yourself, u were just a child. Dont hate the defenses. Release the pain and grow. You got this

[ManonParis-ni]

I struggle with very low self esteem, so when I saw "sadness, depression" as a result of never having to feel hopeful because you're so afraid of being disappointed; I just felt like this was connected. It hits really hard.

[eclecticd]

Always a work in progress. I don’t want my past defining who I am.

[QueBarrbara]

I just had this conversation with my therapist. Extremely helpful to hear it explained differently while having a visual reference. Thank you.

[israeltorralba]

I love the pauses so that we could really take a moment to read what you guys were trying to tell us. Thought it was very powerful and useful.

I deal with being hyper vigilant (my anxiety is tough), depression, and even addiction.

It’s a tough life to live sometimes and I hope that I can get better and do better. Bc if I’m being honest, sometimes I don’t always do my best or all that I can.

I appreciate the timing of this video because in this moment in life I feel very aware of my defense mechanism and see how much they take away and have taken away from me and my life. Thank you for the video, very informative and affirming. Now I know I need to do the work to let these mechanisms go and live a better life.

[osheen]

The way this video was structured made me feel present in the moment. Never for a second did I check how much time had passed and how much time was left for the video to end. Something about the visuals, the voice and the overall content of the it, generated a feeling that had been absent for a long time. A sense of having understood and being understood at the same time. Thankyou

[jjrecon]

Take responsibility for yourself and respond wisely~
Hold yourself accountable without beating yourself up~
Balance ~ Stability ~ Agility

[BMTroubleU]

'Independence and self containment' really hits for me and I don't have many friends because I've learnt not to rely on them.
Thankfully, having a family with 4 kids has saved me. They're always there, kind of because they have to be... but also because they rely on me and I'm grateful for them saving me from loneliness.

[PYTEddie]

This is a very logical and detail way of explaining how to overcome psychological trauma from personality disorder friends/family. It is easy to just delete those people from our lives, but when those are someone close to us like family or relatives, long term relationship with these people develop mental health problems and confidence issues. This is a very well explained video which I highly recommend to those who are experiencing a close relationship with personality disorder people

[EmbraceTheStruggle]

This might be TSOL's best vid to date 😊 really well thought out and organized, and is quite synonymous with the path I've been trying to take lately. This vid honestly made my day and was extremely validating and brilliant 👍

[shydebhar]

I was literally journaling and pontificating on this very issue, trying to identify my normalised dysfunctional psychological issues then this notification popped up ❤

[lib.]

1:26 THANK YOU for leaving that on the screen to the point where u didn’t have to pause to read.