How women DISRESPECT men without realizing it: bursting the bubble

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This is the second installment of my two-part series on unintentional disrespect. The intention is to help prevent women from sabotaging the relationships they want with the men they want to have them with. In this episode, I identify two other ways in which women place themselves above men with their words and behavior, thereby enacting an assumed superiority. I also suggest that men are more sensitive to cues of disrespect given their relative preference for hierarchical arrangements and their lack of social protections.

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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #women #relationship

[psychacks]

This is the second installment of my two-part series on unintentional disrespect. The intention is to help prevent women from sabotaging the relationships they want with the men they want to have them with. In this episode, I identify two other ways in which women place themselves above men with their words and behavior, thereby enacting an assumed superiority. I also suggest that men are more sensitive to cues of disrespect given their relative preference for hierarchical arrangements and their lack of social protections.

Book a paid consultation:

Social Media




Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community:

Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com

Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.

#psychology #women #relationship

[doates]

Gentlemen, if a woman ever makes a disrespectful or sarcastic remark about you, *especially* in the presence of others, call it out *immediately*, and do not back down when she pulls the classic "It was just a She likely knew what she was doing, and is trying to use plausible deniability to make you look like a hot head or insecure rather than taking accountability for the disrespect. Get your apology, or get out.

[thrivepodcast]

This is so spot on. I, as a woman, am seeing these patterns and tendencies within myself and there's only so much I can blame on wanting to protect myself or childhood trauma. The choice is mine now. I see it affecting my relationship and I have no one to blame but me. Thank you for this wake up call and helping me in choosing another path.

[StardustMonkey]

This is golden. I am a man in a long term marriage with a woman. I realized with your first video that I had allowed some of this type of behavior to be normalized. So I did an experiment to see if I could return some ground in terms of boundaries. I am sharing because I think it might be interesting to men and women to hear: so my wife often interrogates me about what I am doing and how much money I spend on things. I am ok with us keeping each other accountable for financial responsibility reasons but it is done so much like a mother to a baby the way she demands I explain myself and keeps me on defense like a managed child. I realized I often have little white lies and secrets solely for the reason of avoiding this demeaning behavior. So for example I would lie about where I was, not because I am cheating but because she will interrogate me if it’s something I like to do and I feel guilty if it’s not something for the kids or her! As I thought about this I realized suddenly how crazy it is and I hated this very badly and this disrespect was one of the main things that was causing antagonism and a huge amount of pent up resentment in me that often comes out with me getting angry or doing something disrespectful back to her(just not as often nor as successful). So she asked me where I was and instead of lieing or telling the truth I said “I don’t feel like answering that right now” she flipped out and I always so shocked how much this triggered her. She started on the interrogating of Inwas cheating or did something wrong why can’t I tell her. And I held firm with zero emotion and said “if your not going to ask me in a respectful tone then we are not having a conversation” she almost got physical she was so pissed. It was then I realized how damn accustomed both of us are to this toxic power imbalance… it seemed like the end of our relationship for half a day… but I felt firm and when she was calm I walked up to her unprompted and I said “I love you” and kissed her really passionately then said “all I want is for both of us to be respectful to each other. If I was cheating on you I would make up a stupid lie, I am only saying that I wish for you to trust me and stop acting like the police. If you can’t do this I won’t cheat … I’ll just walk away and then it won’t be cheating because I’ll be single” now I said this in a very clear confident voice but also accompanied it with another kiss that spoke non verbally how much I hope she would choose to stay. The following week has been the best our marriage has been in a long long time. It’s too short to say that this is resolved but I thought if sometime is trying to establish boundaries know that it might get rocky before it gets better.

[ShonnMorris]

Women: "I should be able to question my man If he has a problem with it he is insecure"
Men: "I should be able to question my woman"
Women: "No! That is toxic and controlling!"

[chumleyk]

Man has boundaries and preferences, woman says he is insecure. Manipulation 101.

[RyanPatrickFlanagan]

A large majority of women will dislike this video because he's telling the truth. I'm still going to share it with them anyway! Thanks Doctor!

[Vision-ddfl]

My Ex told me to Shut The Fvck up, over a little disagreement. I immediately checked her, she didn't even apologise, didn't even aknowledge she did anything wrong. I walked away from her house the following morning, as I felt disrespected. She sent me a text message and ENDED the relationship. Got disrespected & dumped on top of that. Two days later she starts blowing up my phone, trying to get back together with me. She gave me an apology with the promise that she would behave better in the future. I stupidly gave her another chance.. Only 4 weeks later she went into an agressive rage in a disrespectful way, because I laid down a boundary about using social media at the dinner table. I told her to leave my house, and never spoke to her again.

[JLMcFarlin]

Was at a family reunion. There was a young woman with a hoodie that read “I love it when men shut the fuck up.” I didn’t like it. My wife made a big deal about my not liking it. It’s amazing how her contempt for me made it impossible for her to see my dislike and side with me. Her feeling that women have been oppressed made her side with open contempt. Her response: “Why are you letting that stupid shit bother you?” To me, it was clear that she was at some level in agreement with the sentiment. It became a major issue and I have begun drawing lines, neither to give nor accept disrespect.

[allenlin]

The problem is most women do believe they are above men in relationships, which is why they disrespect men.😂

[stillawake]

Some version of “Hope you can handle my sarcasm” is EXTREMELY common on women’s dating profiles.

[Sir_Viver]

This set of videos can also help men who feel disrespected by the women in their lives but don't know how to articulate WHY they feel disrespected.

[goldrushpro]

Pretty simple, just don't accept anything less than decent and respectful - PERIOD!

[JuniperLamplight]

One important behavior I learned is, when faced with disrespect, especially publicly: “you do not speak to me like that.” If she defends herself, double down then walk away.

[drumsnbass]

I put up with plenty of disrespect in our marriage. Oddly, when I started calling out her s**t is when the marriage came to an end.

[benrayfun]

I’ve had this conversation with my gf & she kept up the negative behavior to the point she’s now my ex & have seen me with other women on dates. The relief of letting go was immediate…💯

[Khan-rzqi]

I completely understand the “Infantilizing Surveillance” bit you touched on. My mother used to be like this when I was growing up, I had to sit her down and tell her that she doesn’t get to tell me anything and if she continued she’d just lose all contact with me all together.

She thought I was joking, I ended up cutting her off for 3 years. We reconnected, and she ended up fixing her behavior. I like peace and quiet, no woman in my life gets to disrupt my peace. Either they fall in line, or bounce.💯

[Uncle_HXNY]

I thought i was insane for hating to explain myself to women 💭 Mind blowing 😳👌💯

[juliebjorn]

This has been an interesting series, and in my experience absolutely correct. Been with my husband for 30 years; early on, he set hard boundaries about being disrespected, especially in front of others (it rarely went the other way). Thankfully, I knew he was right and changed my behavior, so it was never a conversation that needed to be had more than once. In case it needs to be said, he treats me with the same respect I treat him, it absolutely goes both ways.

We are adults working as a team, and treat each other accordingly. I'm not his mom, his boss, or his HR department. As a result, we have always had a strong relationship, and are able to model the same for our kids. Hopefully, when they grow up and start relationships, respect will be their foundations, as well.

[whocarescrapsa]

Modern women really have a hard time with this respect issue. I keep hearing them ask why they should have to respect a man. I suggest that they try imagine a man that they love so much that they would give up their life for him without question or hesitation. You choose to dive in front of that bullet to save him. If such a man existed - how would he have to treat you? If he told you that you were his 7th option - would you die for him? If he was disrespectful and humiliated you publicly - would you die for him? They say this is old fashioned thinking because men won't die for women these days! Oh, do you mean like what is going on in the Ukraine right now?